Should I tell her he's been sleeping with me

[Damaged27]

Changed name for this as its really outing. My ex and I have been sleeping together since we broke up kind of a fwb situation. Where not together and free to do whatever with whoever. However iv just found out, not from him that he has been in a relationship with another woman for almost a year and she is a minimum of 12 weeks pregnant with his child. He has not said a word to me about this. Aibu to tell her or should I just walk away and let them have their little family.
Yabu. Don't tell her
Yanbu. Tell her what a cheating asshole she is with.

Oh dear.

What's your problem?

I don't have one.

So why are you concerned that I have children and about the way I spell

Op could be dyslexic….

You quite obviously do.
You replied just to call OP thick, and tell her not to have children until she knows her there/their/they're and were/Where's

Doubt it

Far out, you MUST tell her, imo.

What if it was you.

This woman needs to know that if she's only 12 weeks, there's still time for her to decide if, after having this information, she wants to continue with the pregnancy. She might decide to abort, get rid of him, then move on with her life, cutting all ties, or she might forgive him or leave him and keep the baby. Either way, that's up to her to decide, but not knowing takes this very important life decision away from her.

I'd give him the chance to tell, or I would be telling her if he didn't.

What you should not be doing is having any relationship with him in future, whether you say something to the mother of his child to be or not.

What exactly was the point of that?

Well, you’d be ‘fucking furious’ at the wrong person.

You’d be far better directing your fury at the cheating, lying arsehole.

The OP is now doing the right thing, in my opinion.

Putting the responsibility where it lies - with the man at the heart of this shit show. It’s not up to the women to sort this out for the ‘men’ (using the term loosely).

If he decides not to say anything, she can make further decisions as needed. But put the responsibility where it actually lies first.

I think the line we’re all looking for when someone comes on to derail is: ‘anyway……’

🙏 let’s all just ignore and not get sucked in?

Typing on a phone is no excuse, especially when OP has constantly used the wrong spelling each time.

If you like.

I think the girlfriend should know as it is such a health risk for her and her baby. This is a right carry on! I hope you teach your children about contraception when they are of that age and break this circle.

Don't tell her. Get a (mutual) friend to do that. She needs to know but coming from you won't do any good. She needs to know that you didn't know he was with her.

And give him hell. He's a cheating louse and you are well shot of him.

Most of all, take care of yourself. Raise the bar to the skies for relationships because you deserve love and respect. If you don't show yourself respect, why should anyone else?

Sending hugs and healing x

Just think about what you would want if you were her.

Just walk way and leave it alone. What is itls done is done you can't change anything. Just walk away.

Get a (mutual) friend to do that

Yet another suggestion for the womenfolk to sort out the boys’ nonsense.

When did we start having such unbelievably LOW expectations of men….?

Yes, the guy’s a shit. But why not at least give him an opportunity to step up? If doesn’t, then make further decisions.

Raise the bar to the skies for relationships because you deserve love and respect.

And this is great advice! But the OP will say she is very much not looking for a relationship. Just sex. So when you’re looking for just sex, you get what you get, I guess…..

What do you want to get out of it? Did you think you two may get back together?

Do you really think you are helping her?

Are you just meddling?

Personally from a non emotional perspective. I'd just stop sleeping with him and move on with my life and mind my business.