annoyed woman wont move seats on train

[PrettyPleaseXo]

Currently on the train with my 5 year old. There’s loads of individual seats but none together so I’m stood next to my daughter who’s sat down next to another woman.
AIBU to be a bit annoyed she’s turned her back on my daughter to avoid eye contact and hasn’t moved to another seat so I can sit next to my daughter?

if there were no other seats I’d completely get it but there’s loads of individual ones

Can people not read? The OP did not even ask this lady would it be possible for her to move to another seat. She assumed it, and then gave out annoying vibes.

It is entitlement (parental entitlement).
It's not the same as blocking a seat with a bag (no seats are blocked).

Crikey, that’s a long tunnel the OP is going through.

no doubt

Really? I don't see why the woman should have had to move but wouldn't dream of putting a bag on a seat next to me with the intention of stopping other people sitting there.

@comeagainx so you’re saying in the case of a person just sat on the seat with no other factors inhibiting them from moving, most people would? That’s not the message I’m getting from this thread. I’m assuming here there aren’t any of your listed extenuated circumstances as the OP hasn’t mentioned any. What I’m reading is that actually many posters seem to think the fact that the OP even expected someone to move is outrageous because why should they be inconvenienced for even a few seconds for a strangers comfort.

I wouldn't move. First come, first served.

Exactly. There is no way I would ignore a parent and child if I could just move to another seat nearby - because I have DC and know how hard it can be travelling with them. There is no way I would sit my child down next to complete strangers and move away from them on a train. No way.

What is wrong with some people?

I might move if I was asked nicely - but I certainly wouldn't for passive aggressive behaviour.

so you’re saying in the case of a person just sat on the seat with no other factors inhibiting them from moving, most people would?

No. I'm saying it depends on the circumstances including things like

WERE YOU ACTUALLY ASKED TO MOVE?

how personally inconvenient it would be for you

whether it matters to you (claustrophobia, travel sickness in one or other direction, physically easy to move)

what other seat options are available to the person asking

what other seat options are available to you

why the person asking is asking (good reason or trivial reason - wanting to chat to your mate is a trivial reason).

I think most people if asked politely for a good reason where it wasn't inconvenient or didn't matter to them would probably be willing to move - but there are a lot of factors many of which maybe unseen or not willing to be declared (physical need to be close to a toilet, claustrophobia) that sort of thing.

If there's loads of seats close by then choose two of them and sit near to your daughter? She's 5 you can sit across the aisle from her quite safely

May be you should have reserved seats OP.
Most people do this these days to avoid likely confrontation.

You can't on many trains.

Only on Intercity types.

Where I am you can go on a journey that's 2 hours or longer and it's still just a local 'commuter' train. No reservations.

Why is everyone still posting?

OP's not come back for hours and is likely there now :)!

Why this particular woman rather than any of the other people (including men) in the carriage?!? I bet you've alighted on a middle aged woman as well haven't you OP?

@EggyBreadBrekkie

because we are being provoked by Entitlement Trolls and we enjoy it!

Maybe she wants a window seat and doesn’t want to disturb someone else. If you didn’t reserve seats you can’t really complain. All you can do is ask people and hope someone might move. Yes it’s a little selfish of her but she might have her reasons and you may have been staring daggers making her turn her back…

Bit different but I’ve had so many cheeky people on the aeroplane, one wanted to swap as ‘he needed more leg room and I was shorter’ - one wanted my aisle seat to sit with his girlfriend (which I like to be able to get up often), I always just say ‘I’m keeping my seat thanks’ and they get really pissed off.

Moving seat might well mean more than a few seconds inconvenience though!

I would move to let two people sit together, whatever their age. It’s not entitlement to expect people to have basic good manners. The last time I got on a Tube with my 10 year, we sat apart but a kind person immediately moved so we could sit together. I thanked them. It really isn’t hard to take notice of what is going on around you and make someone’s day a bit better.

If there were lots of other available seats then in this scenario YANBU!

But I would have gone and found a different single seat next to someone who looked more likely to move and let you sit together.

At the very least I would have asked if she would consider swapping, and if not no worries. (and then sing 100 verses of the wheels on the bus)

I had this on a train journey once. Me travelling with 3 kids and every single table of 4 had ONE person sitting at them. So I sat all three kids down together and told them I'd be sitting over there and enjoying a peaceful journey. The woman I'd sat them with then offered immediately to give up her seat and sit elsewhere.

I’m on your side OP. She’s a twat. Most of the parallel universe which is mumsnet seems to support selfish women, but if a man did this no punishment would be too harsh!

It's also basic good manners not to assume entitlement to a seat someone else is already quite happily sitting in.

She's a twat for sitting in her seat, which nobody has actually asked her to move from? Maybe she is picking up on OP's passive aggressive entitled 'vibe' and choosing, sensibly, to ignore it.

It is not entitlement to expect people to have basic good manners.

What happened to asking instead of just assuming?

It's possible she had an advance ticket - which is only valid if you sit in your specific reserved seat. I wouldn't risk being fined in those circumstances.