To ask If you have terrible neighbours how do you cope?

[Ulysees]

We live in a street with mainly rented houses. We own. They're good solid houses that people were keen to have years ago. Now they're rented out to mainly ok and decent people but some are dreadful.

I thought our new neighbour was ok. They've been there a few months now. They haven't done anything personally but the door is always being almost kicked in, windows broken. Yesterday we had gcs staying and as they were sitting watching a film next door and board (no window now) was being bashed and a man was threatening indoor guy and swearing. I actually phoned the police who came after. This isn't rare either.

We're not young and dh is a lot older. It's so stressful thinking about moving. We have been looking but would need to cash buy. We could sell ours too but obviously that won't be instant.

We're going to talk to the local councilor but doubt there's anything that can be done? Has anyone had success with this sort of thing? I pity anyone else going through it.

I own

My nightmare neighbours also own so there is no recourse unfortunately other than selling up an moving.

It can be utterly horrific. Issues include;

They have 3 dogs that are never walked, left out in the garden 24/7/365 & bark constantly

They rarely clear up the dog shit so it stinks

They hose their dog wee over their patio and it runs under my fence

ine dog is viscous and has broken through their fence into my garden and they do nothing to stop it...i have had to baracade it on my side but the dog savages the fence every time i walk in the garden

They have VERY loud rows with language that would make a tailor blush.dd has learnt some delightful words

They have the TV so loud I can hear it over mine

They play exceptionally loud music and sing louder along with it badly

They have drunked parties with weed smoking etc

And then they have the audacity to complain dd makes too much noise between 3pm and 6pm...she doesnt finish school in a village 5 miles away til 3.10 and is in childcare til 6pm cos I work full time

They have come round screaming abuse because they couldn't park outside their house...we live in terraced house with no off road parking. Apparently because they have lived here longer inhad to move my car so they could park near their house...err nope first come first serve.

We went away for a weekend, my parents had my dog (they live about a mile away) and we came home to the wife coming out the house to scream at me that my dog woke her up at 2am barking in the front yard. MY front yard isn't fenced in so the dog is never out the front alone...never mind the fact the dog wasn't here

Abused me on Facebook because the dog was barking at home and disturbing them...I have cameras so sent them the feed showing them the dog was sound asleep...they record whenever they capture movement...she hadn't moved in about 2 hours (she is very old). I phoned a friend and asked her to pop and get the dog, didn't tell neighbour. Dog was collected about 15 mins later...3 hours later they started more abuse the dog was distressed and yapping etc...my mate posted a picture back saying BS dog is in X village about 5 miles away!

They are CRAZY.

I think they wanted to buy the house themselves to extend theirs into it and were pissed off that my offer got accepted and theirs didn't.

I tried killing with kindness and after nearly 5 years inhave given up. We don't make excessive noise but I no longer curb dd from making noise and may have actively encouraged her trumpet practice in her bedroom whilst wearing noise cancelling headphones

My mental health has suffered terribly since we got new neighbours in December 2020. I won't go into the full ins and outs but he has an alcohol and anger management problem and the two don't combine well, he goes at the drop of a hat and we are his targets every time because I asked him twenty million times to stop blocking our driveway with cars.
We're desperate to move but after DH being made redundant and my business performing very poorly for the last two years, it's taking longer than we hoped. Shame because I loved this house and loved being in it. Now I hate being home when he's around and I'm scared to go in and out too much and run the risk of bumping into him in case I look at him funny 🙄
In the interim I've decided to try and take care of myself more this year because I can't go on with the heightened level of anxiety constantly. It's physically affecting me.

Unfortunately, whilst there are ASB laws in place, these only work if you have reasonable people and guaranteed if your neighbours are causing issues they are by definition not reasonable people. If they rent you can contact the landlord but you are forever waiting for the noise to start again. It takes over your life and really effects your mental health. The only thing you can do with appalling neighbours is move ASAP.
I do not know what the solution is with people who are poor neighbours because they have to live somewhere. These days you really need to research the area you are planning to move to. Turn up at different times of day and hope that your neighbours do not sell up and move elsewhere.

Another random thought, if you have the letting agent's name and DoB, can you look them up on 192.com? If you have a vague location, likely to be local....They're probably ex directory though but maybe worth a try.

As you can tell, I was driven so mad by mine I investigated all avenues.....

I’m sure this kind of shit was far less of an issue 50 or even 40 years ago. Have people just become a lot more selfish and disrespectful?

i currently have new nightmare neighbour. If there not having super loud sex throughout the night and i mean loud and every night , there screaming at each other at all hours. There smoking weed which stinks the street out. They Sit outside at all hours talking really loud or blasting 80s love ballads with the patio doors and windows open. They are a bloody nightmare. I hate spending time in my own bedroom and back garden because of them. I used to love my house but since they moved in, they have really affected my happiness. Cant do much as they bought it.

@Onceuponaheartache that's horrific. I'm so sorry you're going through this 😞

I'll give it a try? I'll probably go to the building they're in though. Thanks.

@DelilahBucket I'd be reporting him to the police over and over. That's harassment.

Complain to whoever owns the house and keep complaining, hopefully they will at least start keeping an eye on their property more. Try and be out more. Put your house on the market and move.

God this is the most depressing thread I've started

Meant to add but it's good we can vent.

I've just found them today but there's no contact. I'm looking into it though.

We have had our fair share. We've been unlucky.
They move eventually.

We had a guy who had hot tub parties at 4am. Then he'd kick them all out and they would stand outside our house talking loudly and kidding themselves that he was meeting them in a minute. Lik fuck he was. They were there another hour before phoning for a taxi, chatting absolute drunken bollocks.
It became a running joke that our neighbour was the weekend slag pied piper.
Another neighbour expected me to be a childminder. She suggested we share our gardens. Erm...I don't think so.

The house next door to us is owned by a slum landlord with several houses in our city. He doesn't care who he rents to as long as he gets his money. He lives in London, whereas we are in the midlands, so he doesnt give a damn. He has rented it out to various undesirables over the last five years and one time he rented to someone who put up 6 months rent advance, no surprise, it was turned in to a cannabis factory. After it got busted he moved the current tenant in who is a young woman with 5 young kids and she moves a different undesirable bloke in every few months. The latest one isn't as bad as previous ones but the house is filthy and the garden a disgusting tip. There's a lot of shouting from the house, usually at the kids, however, there have been worse tenants so I just try to think it could be worse and pray that it doesn't get worse. I do detest the landlord and other greedy exploitative lanlords and fantasise about them dying a slow, painful death.

Of course it's got worse. Everything has.

I always seem to attract the alcoholics for some reason! In my rented flat I had an alcoholic living upstairs who (when drunk) was a f*cking horrible prick. Then, we bought our house 18 months ago and low and behold, an alcohol next door! 🙄. As they've lived here for 30 years all the neighbours pretty much don't believe that has said/done the vile things she has, but us and the previous owner of our house know the truth lol.

I know, but like a lot of people on this thread, if we do that it affects us when we sell. We've got a lot of CCTV footage of his behaviour though, the threats and such like. If we sent it to his public service employer he would lose his job in a heartbeat. If it goes up a notch that will be our next step, but at the moment he has a wife and kids and as much as she has been an absolute bitch in my direction, having never even said hello to me since the day they moved in and repeatedly talking about me behind my back to other neighbours (yes it is like being back at school 🙄), I still feel sorry for her. I used to be with a man like that, and I had his card marked the day I met him due to past experience, and it's no wonder she's just as vile. She's reliant on him and his income.

@DelilahBucket well I'd be sending the evidence. You'd be doing dcs a favour probably. There's some vile people about.

Social housing . Took years to get a flat and was over the moon. Found out once if moved in that it was a " sensitive let " . Definitely wasn't advertised as such as if never of bid on it . Was assured the neighbour was " as good as gold "
12 months later I'm band 2 on housing again due to severe harassment and threats . Submitted letters of support from the police and my doctors .
Downstairs neighbour is an alcoholic with a love of Ketamine and a definite hatred of women . Has threatened me on at least five occasions with violence and we share a communal entrance so I feel scared all the time .
Was moved here after struggling from years of DA so feel incredibly cheated and so sad . I mostly cope by using noise cancelling headphones and praying he will at least fall asleep at a reasonable hour so I can . I've struggled with suicidal thoughts , can't have my granddaughter over anymore either. Complained to council ( eventually ) as was loathe to draw further attention to myself and involved the police too ( he currently is bailed with conditions I E. Not to talk to me or cause disturbance in his flat that will be likely to distress ) . Hoping I can get out before we end up in court .
Feel for all the people out there suffering in this way ...x

My stress levels go up when my neighbour gets home and I can hear her tippy-tappy high heels across the floor. The smell of weed often follows later.

It has got worse. I always lived in terraces or flats made out of a property and I've never had noise and nuisance until I lived next to a HMO and then the 2 horrible neighbors.

The trouble is with our council they are naive or don't care because it doesn't affect them. One woman I rang at the council thought it was funny!

I worked in a stressful job throughout the pandemic. The hot tub neighbors were furloughed so they had a great time in the sun. The other side didn't work so screaming all night whilst high on coke didn't bother her. I survived on 3 hours sleep a night. Going out didn't help because I had to come home to it. But both sides were very sensitive to any noise that wasn't them.

The hot tub side tried to put off my potential buyers with loud music and splashing around in the hot tub. So she didn't want me there but didn't want me to sell. I think she got off on upsetting me. I think she also hated that she knew nothing about me.

People like this know they are noisy. They just don't care.

All quiet on the western front. Probably because it's peeing down? Over the road are often on the front arguing or friends are fighting. Plus various strange people hanging around. They're always home. We work shifts so are home different days but the people who cause all the problems obviously don't work or if they wfh I'd like to know what it was? 🌿🌿🌿

Glad it is quiet today. Long may it last. I'd still recce the building though if that's your best option.

The fact that you're noticing it's quiet is a thing. When it was loud, I was stressed, when it was quiet, I was stressed wondering when it would get loud again. It's no way to live.

@murasaki it's not often that bad. Saturday was bad as it's been. We actually had worse neighbours a few years ago, over the road in the other noisy house. He was evil I won't say things he did as it'd upset people. He ended up in prison and died there. In his 20s. Shocking what went on.