Federal superstate was coined by a remainer IIRC.
Call it what you will. Ideology, project, objective. It's the same thing. Unless you're hoping that it will never happen and don't want a word for it.
I'm sure plenty of countries do value their national identity. But that is often in direct threat to the superstate. Being a member of the EU means putting the interests of the EU first, not national interests.
The closest the EZ (and maybe the EU) has come to splitting was in the GFC around 2010. The ECB (controller of monetary policy for the EZ) wanted to impose fiscal constraints on the Greeks which were being strongly rejected. The Greeks of course were running their country on an unsustainable fiscal path which was a direct threat to the EZ. But were unwillingly to compromise because they believed as a nation they had more right to choose how they spend their money themselves than cede authority to the EZ. In the end they were threatened with expulsion from the EZ and they had to comply with the ECBs wishes. But this didn't happen without a massive amount of social unrest and ended up being a pretty close run thing as to whether Greece would be expelled from the EZ and ultimately the EU.
This is a clear example of how the belief in the primacy of national identity/sovereignty over the superstate presents a direct threat to the stability of the superstate. So no, not "nonsense" as you describe it. I suggest you read the book "Adults in the Room" by Yanis Varoufakis for an interesting insight into how the negotiations went.
As regards NATO and the EU, one of the concepts of statehood is that a state defines its own foreign policy. With the US appearing to be less interested in NATO and pivoting towards China as the area where it focuses its military, it is going to be less interested in contributing to and maintaining NATO. The EU has a chance to step into that gap and form its own foreign policy and military component to defend itself (as any state should) - ie further integration of both foreign policy and military - another step on the way to becoming a superstate.
It's not at all clear to me that it will be in the UKs interest to be part of a military collaboration with the EU due to it's strong ties with the US and the anglo intelligence community/co-operation, so I would be interested in hearing why you think that is the case that we would be better off in Europe, which to date has been unwilling to spend enough money on defence and has a far inferior intelligence gathering capability compared with the US.