What's your timeline for throwing away wedding invitations?

[sockmuncher]

A relative dropped off her wedding invitation on Saturday morning.

I complimented the beautiful invitation. Then I copied the important details into my calendar and set the invitation on the side with the recycling.

We chatted on for a few hours & had a lovely catch up.

She has text me today to say she's been wondering whether to say anything or not but shes hurt the invitation was 'dumped' so quickly. It's got my back up, I appreciated the invitation and how beautiful it was but how long should I keep it for so it's been appreciated enough?

I'm not going to send anything back other than to apologise for hurting her feelings, but i have done this with every wedding / party invitation. Am I in the minority?

There’s not enough room on my calendar for all the info contained in a wedding invitation so I just put ‘wedding’ and keep the invitation on the fridge to refer to the time, address, gift list info etc. then get rid after the wedding.
I can see why she was miffed that you threw it away so quickly. A bit odd of her to tell you but at least you won’t upset anyone in future in similar situation!

There is no timeline for disposing of them. I usually keep invitations until after the event, just in case I have missed something important or noted anything wrong, but that's just my personal preference. There is no right or wrong as far as a timeline is concerned.

However, what was wrong was throwing it away in front of her (could you not have waited a few hours until after she had left? It would still have been in your recycling the same day). The couple have likely spent time designing the invites, and money paying for them. That was very, very rude, and I would have found that hurtful too (for my own wedding, I knew the majority of the invites would end up in the bin, in fact, my DH and I had a joke that only two invites would ever remain intact - one that we kept ourselves, and one that my own mum kept - no idea what has happened to any others. But I would have found it both hurtful and disrespectful for someone to have done it in front of me).

You shouldn't have done it in front of her.

So you don't put birthday cards in show for a week or so? That's the minimum I'd have done with a wedding invitation too,

What's my timeline for throwing away wedding invitations? Erm, I still have all that I have had over the years. Not that many tbh but it's lovely to see them when I am looking through the box.

I always bring it with me to the wedding!

Agree with others about your timing!

I do tend to keep until the wedding. Then I’ll probably find the invitation in a drawer a few years later and at that point bin it and wish I’d done it earlier.

There's usually loads more detail in invitations that is worth copying out. Accommodation links, who to RSVP etc.

Even if there wasn't it's so obviously rude to chuck it out in front of the person who gave it to you that I think you know it is really and just want to be told it's OK to be rude.

I think it's really rude what you did , I keep mine on the fridge til the wedding and then I usually keep them in a box I have with any bits and pieces from weddings I've been

I do the same.

Thanks all for your responses.

In future, I'll at least wait until the person has left the house before I bin any invitations. I think its very interesting how long others keep invitations for.

My manners left me and I would hate to think I've upset a relative I'm very fond of.

I would keep it until the wedding and I would take it with me as it contains the time and location which I might have mis entered into any calendar.

Regardless of whether you actually take it with you, I can’t believe you discarded it in front of her. I find it even harder to understand how you don’t see how this would have been upsetting. Good on hear for raising this with you.

You put it in the recycling in front of her?

It’s really not that interesting.

Sorry we cross posted. Just saw your latest update.

I think that's a wise move!

I used to take a pic & bin them straight away but I have a notice board in the kitchen so keep them up there until the wedding now.

I can understand why your relative was a bit upset as she probably put lots of time & effort into them but I guess with weddings, it’s only really important to the B&G

So you don't put birthday cards in show for a week or so? That's the minimum I'd have done with a wedding invitation too,

I don’t, I don’t like cards. 😅 But birthday cards for your own birthday are very different to a wedding invite to someone else’s wedding anyway imo.

No, I bin them after reading them. However, not in front of the person who has just given me the card.

I have a baby on the way and I'll definitely keep any of the cards he gives me but that's obviously a bit of a different situation.

It’s not really about how long to keep it, you were just outright rude. I actually don’t believe this even happened so I’ve reported this thread.

You recycled it in front of her?! That was incredibly insensitive.

I always keep the physical invitation until the event and take it with me. I have been to some weddings where there was light security, eg in one area of a hotel or stately home that has been closed to the public and is only open to wedding guests. I was very glad to have the invitation on one occasion when we had been given a day invitation by mistake and were only expected for the evening. Having the physical invitation meant that we could show we were there legitimately rather than through cheeky fuckery. We offered to leave and come back but they very kindly made space for us and got the caterer to make two extra meals.

I was going to ask - how on earth did she find out you had recycled the invite. I had this vision of her going through your bin a few weeks later !

You actually threw it away in front of her ! Savage !!!!!!!!!!!!! This is something I can imagine DH with AsD doing .

Im not being rude to you but this is hilarious !

I keep them up on the mantlepiece until the wedding, usually. They are usually pretty and look nice to display. Birthday, valentines, thank you, Mothers day etc cards usually stay up for two to three weeks or until the next occasion's cards displace them!

Awks.

Ohhhh, scary!!

I can't even send Mumsnet a photo of the invitation in the recycling because the bin was taken on Tuesday morning so this is very unfair

I also would recycle almost immediately (and do with Christmas cards tbh as they're just clutter) BUT I would never do it in front of someone's face... I'd at least fake that I was going to keep it! What they don't know doesn't hurt them but what they do know might....