To wonder what happened to Janet and is she ok?

[letsbepositive2024]

Trying to keep this concise and sort of lighthearted as it's weirding me out.

DH friend Dave was/is married to Janet. He met up with Dave for gigs etc as they have a shared music interest. Janet also went to gigs with them as did her best friend, Sally. I met Janet and Sally quite a few times and all very friendly.

Six months ago Dave and Janet suddenly split up due to his excessive drinking, apparently. He's now sober and came around last night, and introduced Sally as his girlfriend! We had a pleasant enough evening but I just wanted to ask 'where is Janet? Are you still friends with her Sally? Was this an affair? Does she know?

I know it's none of my business and DH doesn't know anything but it's like Janet never existed and that her and Sally were never bestfriends. Sally was talking away quite happily about their plans and future and they're moving in together, but no mention of Janet.

It's makes me want to shout JANET and see if she metaphorically appears.

She did exist as I met her!

Am I losing it? Is this weird? Should I ask?

Actually, I also really want to know what happened to Janet now!!!

PMSL. 🤣

#justiceforjanet

Just placemarking, tbh 😄

I would guess that Janet and Dave didn’t split up due to Dave’s drinking at all. They split up because Dave was with Sally and the drinking is a cover.

YANBU.
Please let us know what you find out about Janet! Hope she is ok.

I would insist DH asked what's going on with Janet in a 121 situation.

Too awkward to bring it up in a group with Sally presence, but entirely reasonable to ask your mate how things are going and what they're doing about the divorce.

Given that you've met Janet, I think it would be fair to ask either Dave or Sally "What's Janet up to?"

There once was a woman called Janet
Who disappeared from the face of the planet
She discovered her husbands affair
And facing an horrendous despair
She ran off with a policeman to Thanet.

lol pp

I hope Janet is on here and sees all the comments

How the hell do you live with these men?

Thankfully DH loves all info, i can't imagine him getting through even arranging the couple coming to the house without an "Oh what happened to Janet?" He has literally texted me one time and written on paper another to tell me major gossip during a call.

I hope Janet is living the high life and having a lot of fun.

Poor Sally has caught him on the rebound and is going to get her heart broken 💔

Obviously, if she was messing with Dave before he and Janet broke up, she totally deserves it.

[Intended to be light-hearted!]

There's no possibility you husband had been helping his friend by pretending to Janet they were together when he was actually sneaking around with sally is there??

I'm just imagining Janet from the Good Place appearing when you shout her name.

Dacadactyl

Your DH sounds just like mine. He wouldn't even THINK to ask what happened to Janet! And if I asked him to find out via Dave, he'd just say "oh it's none of my business".

I don't know any woman who wouldn't be itching to find out the story.

YANBU. I want to know what's happened to Janet too. Hope she's OK.
Exactly all of this!

Poor Janet, find out everything you can OP and then update us immediately!

LIke he just cut and pasted sally in

There was a bloke at my sports club who was intending to do exactly this kind of thing at our Christmas party.

He was married, but had been having an affair. When I asked if he was coming to the party, and bringing his wife (we'll call her Ermintrude), he said "No! I'm bringing my girlfriend." I was surprised, as he hadn't mentioned that he'd split from his wife, and asked her name. I also asked if he wanted me to give the rest of the group a heads' up, as most of them knew he was married and DIDN'T know that he had had an affair.

He then said there was no need to tell anyone anything, and that no-one had met Ermintrude anyway so would assume that Girlfriend was actually Ermintrude, and he saw no reason to disabuse them of that idea.

I think I actually stood there opening and closing my mouth like a goldfish for a couple of minutes before energetically telling him why he was a twat.

Can you please let us know as soon as you have any information

😄 yes...OP you must find out, and when you do tell us!

I'm guessing Janet and Sally are no longer mates.

Is Sue OK?

I would’ve just said “and how’s Janet?” With or without putting my head on one side. I’m not sure.

Poor Janet. Dave and Sally are dicks who were at it behind Janets back. I hope she is happy and finds a deserving partner and friend.

I’d need to know that Janet isn’t under the patio!

Wanker

This is similar to someone me and dh know
He was going out with a brunette called Emma.
They split up and he was sad and single for a bit.
He then started dating a new lady called Emma, also brunette. Had a kid really quickly (must have been conceived on the first date) and likely during Emma 1 time.
DH didn't say anything for years, kept meeting up with them I was itching to know. Turned out DH hadn't even noticed that Emma 1 had been upgraded to Emma 2. He started embarrassingly referencing a time when we went out with Emma 1 and would not accept it wasn't Emma 2. Soo cringe. He made all the right noises during the break up but literally must have not been listening or paid it so little mind it flew out his head like a goldfish.

And I still don't know anything about Emma 2 because dh didn't bother asking because he thought she was Emma 1 and now we meet I can't make small talk as I have no idea how they met, what she does or who she is. And I've no idea what happened with Emma 1 so don't know how awkward a subject it is. Damn men!

Please update about Janet. I feel it may offer me a weird sense of closure.