To not be thrilled about these tattoos?

[MrsHoney123]

Just wondered how others would feel if their DH of nearly 30 years whom they’d raised three kids with decided in his late 50s to get both his upper arms completely tattooed? Pictures are a skull, a load of roses and a snake.

@MrsHoney123
I don't see anything wrong with tattoos...

A mid life crisis is not sexy.

Tattoos that are meaningful and well done (go to the absolute best they can afford not just the local dive) are nice. But a skull, roses and snake sound like not much thought has gone into it.

Well DH knows how much I hate tattoos and they actually make me feel physically sick so pretty sure he would never get any.

If he did I would be furious and quite likely leave him

I wouldn't care, it's his body.

LOL at midlife crisis. Such an ageist and narrow minded attitude.

Perfectly put - and yuck.

maybe. But there's something midlife-crisis-like about doing something that you've never ever done before, when you get to middle age. You know, doing something totally uncharacteristic.

His choice to get tattoos. Your choice who you have sex with.

You have the right to have an opinion. If his choice means you're no longer attracted to him, he has to live with it.

Personally, I find what you described gross and I don't think I could look at him the same way.

Not quite the same but my DH (partner of 32 years), who I thought disliked beards as much as I did is grown one over Xmas. I hate it, but it’s his face. Not permanent, though, so at least he can shave it off at some point, but as I would not expect him to comment on my hair, clothes, tattoos (I don’t have any, but I’m menopausal, so who knows?!) I can’t dictate to him. You have my sympathies, though.

Those tattoos sound tacky and I would absolutely be upset!

I'd book him in to see a psychiatrist as it would be so incredibly out of character that I'd know something was wrong.

Honestly it would depend on the tattoo. Arms I would have no problem with (assuming they're well done). I have a fair few friends who have facial tattoos (apparently very cool right now) and that I'd have an issue with if ny H did it because it would no longer look like H (these are crap tattoos too, like a viking helmet tattooed all over a male friend's face complete with an entirely black nose, or a really pretty friend who decided to tattoo everything from just under her mouth down to her chest just black).

I generally like tattoos but can be a bit judgmental (my siblings are both professional tattoo artists and will refuse to do something shit so sometimes I do just look in horror at really bad tattoos). It sounds like your DH is going neotraditional which can look great if well done.

But generally a sleeve doesn't in any case affect how someone looks overall so no I wouldn't be annoyed.

I'd have a bloody fit!

@MrsHoney123 Has he had it done yet? Have you told him what you think of the idea?

It is a big change, plus they sound really cheesy.

I think that you're effectively paying for them is relevant, too. He seems to have forgotten that...

How though? He doesn’t have to explain his choices to you, it’s his body. So what exactly would you be having a fit about? You can say ‘I don’t find these attractive’ but you can’t pitch a fit about it.

I'd assume he didn't want sex any more.

I'd be disappointed he'd gone for something so banal and stereotypical, and probably - if I'm being 100% honest - would feel rather let down / hurt that he didn't think making a permanent and not insignificant change to his body warranted at least a "heads up, this is what I'm going to do" discussion first. Not least because decent tattoos aren't cheap, we have shared finances and we make decisions about disposable income outlay together.

Both DH and I are pretty anti-tattoo. I wouldn’t leave him over it as I wouldn’t throw away decades of marriage over a tattoo. I would probably have to be honest with him though that I thought getting substantial tattoos was ridiculous.

To be fair it's probably the real issue. These things aren't exactly cheap.

It's a bit unusual to discover a love of tattoos later on, but whatever. I got my first tattoo when I was about 40 and have since had two more done. They aren't massive though and I did agonise over the designs and run them past my husband at the time.

Old school designs though - I would be more intrigued by the choice of design than the tattoos themselves!! Why did he go for those?

I'd wonder WTF this basic bastard was claiming to be my DH. Seriously, it just would not happen, barring a psychotic break or similar needing emergency medical intervention.

Both myself and my husband dislike tattoos and would never get any.

If for some bizarre reason he wanted one or some and had a conversation with me then I would tell him that I find it unacceptable and would consider it a reason to split up.

If he just went out and got one or some and came home and showed me that would be it, I would divorce him.

His body, his choice

Exactly ! People are being surprisingly laid back