5 year old said something triggering this evening

[Fivesidedstar]

He’s currently obsessed with killing and death in general.

He said “Mummy, I wish I would die” then laughed it off. I was so triggered I felt like I was going to burst into tears there and then. I felt really shaken up too.
I almost shouted at him “Don’t say that!” He just laughed and continued playing.

I’m also a believer in manifestation and speaking things into existence, which is why I’m now in a panic.

Oh come on. Dropping a thread like this in AIBU and including the little detail about believing in manifestation… what might we deduce about that, hmm? 🤔

But anyway, no one is mocking someone with a mental health condition. That’s just something you and @Icelandic9 have decided, it’s not based in fact.

People with OCD are actually more susceptible to intrusions that involve magical thinking, for example believing they can "think" things into existence. It's very common. I really do hope OP doesn't suffer with this condition, because if she does, I can tell you first hand that reading the replies on this thread will make her feel a million times worse.

The Internet Doctor has signed in.

@Snowdogsmitten

I used the word "potentially", didn't I.

I have not "decided" anything. I've said it's possible and if I'm correct, then the responses are potentially very damaging.

If I'm wrong - good. I'd prefer to be wrong. As otherwise there's someone struggling with those type of awful intrusions and reading these replies. Having first hand experience of this condition I honestly dread to think of that.

@Deathbyathousandcats

I actually am a Dr 😂

I couldnt have said it better myself. 👏

If she does have OCD, it sounds like she's been reading/watching the wrong stuff too.

'Law of attraction' etc would be even less constructive to be into if you're prone to intrusive thoughts.

@Fivesidedstar Watch some Doreen Virtue. She used to be a famous New Age teacher and now shows the issues with it all

OP, do you have any friends with children of a similar age? Because I have a 5 year old and in the past year or so they, and other children we know of a similar age, have between them:

Been obsessed with the death of the Queen and the subsequent introduction of the new King as a result (all parents are staunch republicans).
Reported having dreams about themselves, people they know, or the whole world being dead.
Asked if paving slabs with names on them 'have dead people underneath them'.
Asked if common illnesses will 'make them die'?.

It is completely normal and you need to stop making this about you.

@porridgeisbae

Oh I agree entirely. I wouldn't recommend that sort of reading for someone with OCD with those type of intrusive "magical thinking" type thoughts. Then again, people with OCD are compelled to do a lot of things that ultimately don't help and reinforce the intrusions. That's where therapy comes in I guess.

Again, we don't know if this is what the OP is struggling with. It's just hypothetical. But not impossible from the OP.

@sofedupandtiredofthis No it's not impossible that she has some OCD traits but she's also reading the wrong stuff or something presumably, based on the jargon she used.

I think people are being a bit mean about the speaking things into existence.

It's actually not that uncommon to be a bit irrational about speaking of death. Plenty of people will say touch wood or cross themselves or invoke their deity if they say anything about a person dying in future who is still alive.

@Fivesidedstar don't worry it's just a 5 year old exploring language and life and mucking about.

Google box breathing for some calming exercises.

I think for me a few things stood out in the OP: the response is quite extreme - almost bursting into tears, feeling shaky, and feeling compelled to shout don't say that, etc. If one of my kids came out with similar id be disturbed and a bemused, for sure, it wouldn't sit comfortably. But I don't think id have that intensity of emotional response as the OP describes. She then goes onto say she's in a "panic" because of beliefs about thinking things into reality, or manifestation. Again, that wouldn't enter my mind if this happened to me - I'd simply be a bit hmmm that was odd, and taken aback, but probably quickly move past it.

My point is, the OP's response seems to fit more with a pathological/ anxiety-driven one, and maps onto some of the traits of OCD.

This is where my suspicions come from.

And if I'm wrong - If OP confirms either way - then I will of course apologise to her.

At around age six my child was obsessed with prison! what sort of food they served, how long did people get sent there for, who could go and see a prisoner, what happened at Christmas time. Nobody we knew had ever been in trouble with the law let alone had a custodial sentence nor did anyone they knew work in the criminal justice system. Guess they must have glimpsed something on tv or heard something at school.

I think that's a common age to start thinking about death and young kids can kind of 'mess around' with the concept by saying things like your DS - I wouldn't think too much of it. Our oldest first became aware of it at that age, worried briefly about it, then moved on.

It's probably that he realises death is taboo, so he thinks it's funny to say what he did - he has no concept of it being upsetting.

"Triggered" Seriously ? The cloud that you inhabit must be very soft, gentle, pink and fluffy or do you just mean you were a bit upset you to hear your child say that ?

Ha, that reminds me of when I was three! I said I was going to marry my father. My mother said 'what about me?' I said 'it's ok, you can be the bridesmaid!'

To be fair, you don't know if the OP has issues with death. I agree that her post is odd, but you never know what's going on in people's lives.

When I became a parent I let go of my believe in manifestation because of situations just like this. It made me realise how anxiety inducing it is!! I just focus on trying to think positive now.

Like other posters have said, your LO probably doesn’t understand death at all! So, even if manifestation ‘did’ work - it wouldn’t in this case x

Manifestation my arse.

This.

It’s for MLM grifters only, isn’t it?

@VanityDiesHard

Agreed. Sadly not many people appear to care what's going on in people's lives and how their words might affect them.

My 5 year old DS keeps saying "Mummy's willy!" loads over and over. It's driving me mad but it hasn't turned me into the opposite sex yet... ! 😆🤔😅😎

Surely this is a wind-up? Even the "I'm a believer in manifestation" phrasing sounds fake.

He might be upset about something. Try to talk to him.

I would be vigilant in your position, but I don't happen to have been blessed with DC.