To think my DH is being a big girls blouse about the the washing?

[KarenNotAKaren]

For years my DH Has allegedly been sensitive to wet washing - it makes him sneeze, wheeze and gives him itchy eyes. Apparently. He’s getting worse - when I simply take the washing out the machine he says within 30 seconds “Have you taken the washing out? It’s getting to my eyes already!” 🙄

I actually did an experiment in our last house. We had a kitchen living room open plan thing and when he was watching TV I very quietly unloaded the washing machine (he couldn’t see, TV was on loud too so couldn’t hear either) and left it all by the machine, and left the room. Came back 20 minutes later and he didn’t complain one bit or even clock on that he was in the same room as a pile of wet washing.

He won’t line dry his things because it makes his eyes itchy (🤷‍♀️). I can’t even have a sock drying on the radiator because it makes him sneeze apparently. I’d LOVE a heated airer as we spend an absolute fortune on tumble drying, but he’d make a right song and dance no doubt. Tumble drying is the only way he will dry his clothes. Even if I line dry mine he gets all dramatic if I come too close - “Oh god has that top been line dried - my eyes are itchy!”.

Weve just moved into a new home that has an integral washer/dryer. Well it doesn’t actually fucking dry anything? The ‘dryer’ part is a massive lie, so he wants to buy a separate washing machine AND dryer because apparently “I can’t live in a house with a condenser dryer it get to my eyes nose and lungs”. I sneered at him and he got really annoyed. I’d rather just stick with what we have and line dry things or get a heated airer.

I know I sound unsympathetic but I think he’s being so dramatic - I’ve asked his mum and he didn’t grow up with a tumble dryer, everything was dried on heaters and the washing line. He somehow survived childhood unscathed and his mum said he never had any issues. Yet as an adult all this OTT sneezing and “oh god it’s getting to my lungs that is” is going on - I just think he is being an attention seeker. No asthma. No respiratory issues.

Am I a horrible cow who needs to understand his sensitivities better? Do other people suffer like this just from being in the same room as a freshly washed sock? I’ve never heard of a single person who can’t be around wet washing. Or is he being the drama llama I think he is?

I get itchy eyes and can't stop sneezing if I put the wet clothes on the radiator. There are some washing detergents that really get to me but all of them do to some extent. I always do an extra rinse. I just have to live with it as if I don't do the washing no one else will!

He's ex army. Could he possibly have ptsd that's that's manifesting in this way?

I looked up "big girl's blouse" out of interest ( too much time on my hands obviously 😬🤣) and there doesn't seem to be an "original meaning". It was a phrase that seems to have first been used (but not explicitly given a definition) in a TV program in the 60s and repeated in the Guardian (in the 80s) where it was defintely used "as a slur" to insult the skills of male footballers. So I'm not sure where people are assuming its "original meaning" from. I think some people use it as a misogynistic term, and some people obviously use it simply to mean flimsy or weak. When I was at school (70s/80s) it was a term used to imply boys were effeminate or weak (back in those lovely days of casual sexism).

As for your actual question OP - I think I'd be suspicious if your dh isn't reacting when he doesn't actually see the washing. But it could be a psychological thing that he doesn't really have much control over. Maybe tell him he didn't react when he didn't see it and see what he says to that?

What a wimp. Let him do his own washing.

PTSD manifesting in sensitivity to detergent?!

No, the big refers to the man, not the blouse or the girl it belongs to. Its Like saying you big wimp or big baby.

You're derailing the thread. I'm out.

My granny says "Big girl's blouse." Love it . 😀

With you saying he’s ex army is it less about the actual washing and more that the smell of damp is like a trigger for him.

Sorry but he sounds like a massive wet wipe 😂

@AutumnFroglets was just illustratrating with her latest irrevant comment how 🤔 ridiculous the easily selectively offended by allmost anything and everything is,

The irony was lost on someone like you @FayCarew
how hypocritical is that,
that you said that @AutumnFroglets must have underlying issues L.o.l 🙄😂

this is exactly what i think about easily hyper nonsensical sensitivity offended by everything bridage such as yourself,

It bores the pants off 🥱 yawn me

It reminsant of Mary Whitehouse of the 70s or 80s with her bible bashing like minded ones about society ills ect,

It's like they they are the lot of them hyper sensitivity easily offended by allmost anything are channelling Mary Whitehouse beyond her life and now the grave,

I suspose it makes their boring mundane lives a bit more interesting than it really is
adds a bit of contrived spice to stop their lives being endlessly groundhog mind blowing 🤯 mundane boring 😴

Laughed way too hard at all that! 🤣🤣🤣 I note that @FayCarew has buggered off now she's been called out as a snowflake?! With the big girls blouse excuse of people derailing the thread?! Oh dear, well never mind! Bring back the old sayings all day long for me!!! I've been referred to as a big girls blouse as a kid, I didn't faint with the outrage of it all, I thought it was funny... And suck this up snowflakes, still do!!! 🤣🤣🤣

It's the fact the easily hyper sensitivity selectively offended by allmost anything brigade, are so po faced like they are sucking a lemon 🍋 with cats arse backside expression on their faces allmost constantly,
on endlessly quest a mission a self righteousness virtue 😄 signalling one to try to nit pick , analyse and find fault with anybody or anything that they hear about or come across..

Literally slept in puddles 🤣 naked I assume 🤔 my husband is just as pathetic at times but about different things 🤣 I think it’s normal behaviour for men!

Victoria maiden 🤣🤣

Yah I sneeze when hanging washing up.
I can smell it in a room, especially if it’s got even the faintest whiff of stale water eg been left in the washer. I wouldn’t sneeze if you left it in a pile but once you wave it about or put on rads.

I have a condensing tumble dryer, line dry and use rads. I use fairy non bio and I don’t use fabric softener. I think it’s the fabric softener that does it coz it’s essentially a type of soft plastic to smooth fabric.

I use white vinegar in place of fabric softener as it softens clothes and keeps damp smell away. I use a dehumidifier in room if drying loads of washing and I don’t dry it in my bedroom.

I don’t know why you wouldn’t just believe your husband. Why would he lie? It’s a bit mean tbh. He could bring some solutions I guess though.

I’m sensitive to smelly washing powders/conditioner. Try Fairy Non-Bio or some of the supermarket own brand non biological detergents. I detest whatever it is my mother uses!

The insult is saying that he is weak or offering no masculine strength.

I am a big girl. If I wear a blouse I can assure you it's very weak at the buttons 😬

I just want to say -
BIG GIRL'S BLOUSE, BIG GIRL'S BLOUSE, BIG GIRL'S BLOUSE
because it is a great phrase. I think I first heard it used by Bet Lynch in Coronation Street about 50 years ago and she was one tough woman.

It's a shame that the Blouse obsessives have scared the OP away

Just do yours. He can take his to laundrette

I agree that Big Girl’s Blouse is a great phrase and I’m not sorry for using it.

Bought the annoying fecker some anti-histemines today and told him to get his sniffly self to the doctor’s. Will try a new detergent too, many thanks for the suggestions. But if none of this helps he’s on his own in terms of the washing

To a PP - no he didn’t sleep in puddles naked 😂 when he was on exercise if it pissed it down, their tents would be swimming and they’d just have to tolerate it. He says it was the best time of his life - I assume nobody had freshly washed clothes on 🤣

10,000% he has (undiagnosed) PTSD that probably manifests itself in a thousand different ways. But really when he gets no help despite my persistent pressing him to, it’s hard to continue to sympathise with him

‘Big girl’s blouse’ to me always meant you’re being pathetic which means you’re being a big girl. Like the phrase ‘you’re being such a woman’ or ‘you throw like a girl’. Hate all that crap.

Oh and I don’t use fabric softener! Horrible stuff, makes clothes slimy!

By the smell of my DH's kit when he used to come home, I can categorically state they didn't wear fresh changes of clothes! I'd open the washer, add the powder and some Oxi and leave him to load it and switch on!!! 🤣🤣🤣