No alcohol wedding

[KK05]

So I’ve just discovered that my friends wedding in 3 weeks is alcohol free. I was always expecting to pay for my own drink on the day but it turns out they aren’t having alcohol at all. This was a shock as they both enjoy nights out with alcohol and her hen was messy.

My issue isn’t the fact we can’t have a drink, I would still be going either way it’s that we’ve only just found out.

All in all we have spent almost £300 for a hotel the night before and night of the wedding. Night before was so we didn’t have to try and check in either after the wedding or try to squeeze it in at some point throughout the day. Would never have stayed for even one night if I knew I could drive. Too far for cabs/public transport but would have happily driven there and back. Think country estate. Plus it’s a hour away from home (bride and groom live same town as me). Trying to cancel so fingers crossed I get some money back.

There was nothing mentioned on the invites and nothing was said until last night and even then was just mentioned in passing.

My question is it unusual to mention this on invites? I’ve never been to a wedding with no alcohol so not entirely sure. I also know that a few people going could be doing with the extra money in the bank even if only staying one night or trying to arrange transport to and from the nearest town.

Would it be unreasonable to mention to the happy couple that they need to make people aware before the day? Or AIBU suggesting this?

She’s a very good friend if that helps and it’s not the no alcohol that’s the issue but the extra expense that we didn’t really need to spend. Money isn’t a huge problem for us but I’m still annoyed I’m out of pocket.

I see the inability to read the thread or grasp the point remains strong in the last lot of posters.

I had this situation at my wedding. Solved it by not inviting the person I thought would cause issue to the whole event, only the evening. They turned up drunk 🤦🏼‍♀️

You do know you don’t have to have a drink, just because you can - you can save money on accommodation any time you like 😁 it’s an option.

🤦‍♀️

It's not about her not being able to afford it.
The issue is that it's a POINTLESS expense if she's not drinking

This thread is hilarious. I don't really drink any more but for goodness sake, the presumption at most weddings is that they're a boozy affair (absent any religious reasons or a teetotal wedding party.) I think it's entirely fair to presume that there will be alcohol at a wedding (at the guests cost at the very least) and it's entirely fair for guests who are expecting to enjoy a glass of fizz (or more- no judgment) to decide to book a room rather than pay for an hour long taxi fare each way. I can also understand the logic around booking the room for the night before too (because lots of places won't let you check in till 2 or 3pm which is often slap bang in the middle of the ceremony so hardly ideal.)
Even though i don't drink i do still like to book a room at a wedding if it's in a hotel (sometimes its somewhere peaceful to escape to for a breather, or to change out of silly heels into dancing shoes- and avoids night driving which i hate.) However, given the lack of alcohol and the new knowledge around this, of COURSE many guests who are more confident drivers than me would prefer to drive than incur hotel costs. Bleedin eck.

The funniest people on this thread are the ones that think you should have to ask if there will be alcohol at a hotel wedding of drinkers. You people are batshit.

Umm so cancel the hotel? I don’t get what the big deal is.

You would understand if you’d read & be able to understand all OP’s posts🤦‍♀️

What a bizarre situation.
And the irony is that in all probability, the alcoholic who they’re trying to keep “safe” will end up in the bar area getting drunk, while polite guests stay in the reception room drinking water. So it will all have been for nothing!

This would really annoy me. Not the alcohol free wedding itself but being cloak and dagger about it. I like a drink but often choose to drive to weddings because alcohol tends to be £££, and they're often in difficult to get to areas so a 'dry' wedding wouldn't bother me personally but It's pretty important to let people know about something quite fundamental! It's very normal to drink at weddings especially ones where the B&G are not known for being against alcohol.

Having said it wouldn't bother me personally, it would still be a bit weird I think!

How boring. Alcohol is one of the things which makes weddings tolerable 😂 id be taking a bottle in my handbag

Have you read OPs posts?

What a peculiar situation, most people will expect there to be alcohol there and will probably be annoyed if there isn’t and they haven’t been forewarned, especially if they’ve got babysitters and are looking forward to a party. I would imagine that most venues factor in making money from the bar when working out costs so they’ll be annoyed too. They may well end up with an empty room if everyone decides to go elsewhere in the evening.

You are my kind, it would be like asking if there was going to be fish at a pescatarian convention!

Fucking hell people really can’t go without a drink. Been to plenty of alcohol free Christian weddings, just as lovely without a tipple. Geez.

Please can anyone adding to this extremely lengthy thread at least read the OPs posts. Then if you still think this thread is about whether an alcohol free wedding is ok or not, reread them until you understand.

If you rely on alcohol to have a good time and enjoy a wedding something is seriously wrong. I also wouldn’t be upset ag only just finding out….Lordy! First world problems at their finest

I always thought this thread was about the cheek of B&G not stating outright (only later) that it was AF so that people would book rooms enabling B&G to get a discount.

The last lot of posters have only come to it having read the daily fail article and not the actual thread I see...

To be fair there’s a massive difference between an alcohol fuelled party and a dry party and if I’ve paid for a hotel room and babysitter and been looking forward to a good old fashioned piss up I’d be really annoyed to turn up and find it was dry and I could’ve driven myself home and saved some money on the room and the sitter.

IT IS NOT ABOUT THE ALCOHOL PEOPLE- rtwt!

If only you hadn't missed the whole fucking point!

Sanctimonious you are!

Crazy decision. For religious reasons, fine, but otherwise it's daft, people will be disappointed, as weddings are celebrations, and most look forward to a few glasses of whatever.

As for the reason being one person who has alcohol addiction, that's also daft. An entire wedding vibe changed for one individual? Nah I don't believe this.

I wouldn't go, but I understand OP will, as it's more about the (now) unnecessary accommodation costs.

I couldn't bear a dry wedding, I love seeing people happy and merry, and I DONT DRINK ALCOHOL!! Shocker.

I can't believe how much this has blown up.

Anyway I will be keeping the room. We will take some alcohol for the room and can use the bar.

Don't know much else from the B&G but I do know they are now starting to tell others as I've had messages about it.