No alcohol wedding

[KK05]

So I’ve just discovered that my friends wedding in 3 weeks is alcohol free. I was always expecting to pay for my own drink on the day but it turns out they aren’t having alcohol at all. This was a shock as they both enjoy nights out with alcohol and her hen was messy.

My issue isn’t the fact we can’t have a drink, I would still be going either way it’s that we’ve only just found out.

All in all we have spent almost £300 for a hotel the night before and night of the wedding. Night before was so we didn’t have to try and check in either after the wedding or try to squeeze it in at some point throughout the day. Would never have stayed for even one night if I knew I could drive. Too far for cabs/public transport but would have happily driven there and back. Think country estate. Plus it’s a hour away from home (bride and groom live same town as me). Trying to cancel so fingers crossed I get some money back.

There was nothing mentioned on the invites and nothing was said until last night and even then was just mentioned in passing.

My question is it unusual to mention this on invites? I’ve never been to a wedding with no alcohol so not entirely sure. I also know that a few people going could be doing with the extra money in the bank even if only staying one night or trying to arrange transport to and from the nearest town.

Would it be unreasonable to mention to the happy couple that they need to make people aware before the day? Or AIBU suggesting this?

She’s a very good friend if that helps and it’s not the no alcohol that’s the issue but the extra expense that we didn’t really need to spend. Money isn’t a huge problem for us but I’m still annoyed I’m out of pocket.

Why don't you rely on reading the OPs posts and interacting appropriately!

Jesus!!!

Oh oh oh alcohol, I must tell them how fucking pure I am, I don't even need alcohol I'm so bloody entertaining without it!

Well quite that’s the whole point I think that they’re being a pair of CF’s and not honest. However it seems to have turned into drama and hysteria - ‘OMG you expect a glass of fizz to toast the bride and groom. Off to rehab you go’

Honestly MN is a batshit holier than thou parallel universe at times

Maybe a drink would render some of you capable of reading the thread.

What’s the verdict among others OP, @KK05 ?

OMG you're going to consume alcohol......

Faints!

The shock, the horror, the fear!!

@KK05 and what are they saying ? do they all agree its very strange ? 🤔

Said the charmer who feels the need to reply to comment sShe doesn’t agree with 🤣

no, I didn’t miss the point. I just think they’re chatting BS and backtracking to save face!

the internet must be so hard for you 🥰

If I was you I'd stock up your room like a speakeasy and flog drinks- there will be a queue of thirsty guests down the corridor and you'll easily earn back the cost of the room!

Joking aside, I think your solution sounds like the ideal compromise. Please do update us as to how it goes! It's been a most intriguing conundrum (even if the thread has been somewhat frustrated by people who can't read.)

You haven't read the thread properly then have you?

@CantFindMyMarbles what's eshe? Is it a non alcoholic beverage?

I'm a bit late on this one. I'm sober and have been for nearly 16 years. I'm perfectly committed around alcohol and am in fact the licencee of a licensed restaurant.
However, I bloody hate weddings or any sort of party because so many people get pissed. Drunk people are tedious.
Because of this I don't go to parties and try to avoid weddings.
No judgment on whether the people getting married are right or wrong and no judgment about those pissed off about it being dry.

Oh I hate ‘bossy’ weddings like this. Unless it’s for religious purposes (so few weddings are these days) I can’t stand it when the B&G make decisions for them and not their guests

What about judgement on the B&G who are trying to keep the dry aspect quiet so people book a room for their financial benefit.

Y'know, the real point of the thread which I'm sure you're aware of after reading all the OP's posts? 🙄

It’s the word she with an accidental e in front of it.
you responded to so many comments….do you need help? Seriously….I mean no normal person does that. Write your comment and move on. Bless your heart…

Have fun!! Let us know the fascinating reason why?? I agree people should have a choice. Especially with forking out ££ s accommodation these days. I'm 20 years away from drinking, I agree I like to see others enjoying their champagne. I also don't eat pork but I don't boycott the serving of sausage rolls 🐷 it's a personal thing. Enjoy !!

What do the messages say out of interest? I am glad you are not being implicated in the previous lies, and pleased for the guests that they can salvage the day themselves either by cancelling expensive hotel rooms, bringing bottles of wine or deciding to drive home/ or being the first to find the bar.

@AnnOtherLife it’s because there’s an alcoholic in the family. OP has found out.

@CantFindMyMarbles I think you'll find I'm
Not the only one pointing out your lack of comprehension ability.

Take your sanctimonious attitude elsewhere, this thread isn't about "the i can enjoy myself without a drink brigade" ! No need to cares about that, OP never said she wouldn't enjoy herself without a drink, she said she wouldn't have stayed over.

Your point is totally mute, it's not what OP ever asked?

You've just come on a thread to tell people how you are so wonderful and others all have a "first world problem!"

When that wasn't even the question in the first place!

Try reading and comprehending, if you can't then move on.

You mean, you are prepared to pay for two nights at a hotel because you expect to drink too much alcohol to be ablr to drive, but have just learned you will not be drinking alcohol so could drive up and back on the day and save the hotel bill? Am I understanding correctly?

Surely, if paying a hotel bill is a squeeze, you could just keep off the alcohol and be able to drive anyway?

Why does it matter so much when you are told it will be alcohol free if you were willing to pay for the extra night(s)? I simply do not understand why not having alcohol makes any difference, especially when you say money is not a problem. Just enjoy the night away and the hotel breakfast.

People make too much fuss about alcohol. Many people do not drink for a vast array of reasons. Life without people getting drunk is so much better! I can't help thinking that not having alcohol is really what is upsetting you or you would not have bothered to write this. As for, 'Would it be unreasonable to mention to the happy couple that they need to make people aware before the day? Or AIBU suggesting this?' Surely that would be unkind? To criticise her so soon before her important day? What good would that do?

I find this topic baffling. I had no idea that alcohol ran people's lives to this extent.

Most people find your response and lack of comprehension baffling. Hope that helps

How can you not understand this thread? Have you even read it? I can’t be bothered to explain it to you.

And yet another.......

Lack of comprehension amongst non drinkers is rife...

@Itsdifferentnow you need to read OPs follow up comments. She was happy to not have alcohol but had chosen to stay over because she believed there would be alcohol she wanted to drink, and living in Scotland she can't even have the toast bubbles and then drive home, legally. However, the bride told her that she was worried if they told everyone it was a dry wedding then they wouldn't stay over and they'd lose their venue discount for not filling all of the (expensive) rooms

It's not about alcohol vs no alcohol at a wedding. Its about people not being given all the information in order to make their own decisions about whether to book rooms.

The most worrying aspect is not the deception of the hotel rooms bank rolling some of the wedding, nor the ‘dryness’ of the wedding that has been kept quiet. It’s the ridiculous number of people not capable of seeing or understanding the issues and continue to bleat on about the benefits or disadvantages of alcohol! Fuck me. Do these people actually vote????

Oddly enough I tend to drink far less when people around are drinking too much.

So you would never find me squiffy on NYE, work dos or weddings.

Anyway OP has made her decision to keep the hotel room for 2 nights, hopefully the breakfast is good and they can also enjoy walks if it's country.