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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF ILS - anyone else want to vent?

285 replies

CheshGirl · 31/12/2023 11:44

Cooked and hosted Christmas dinner for in-laws as well as my family including my 2 small children (also currently 12 weeks pregnant).

In-laws asked what they could "bring" earlier in Dec, I said nothing really as I had it ordered from Ocado.

By this MIL assumed it was all prepared as her response was "how lovely, Christmas in a box", throughout the day she continued to question what I had made and what had come "done".

We agreed they would bring "drinks"...

Considering there were 7 adults and 2 children, any guesses what they turned up with...?!

OP posts:
MrsSparkington · 01/01/2024 18:35

I'd have uninvited them as soon as MIL said 'Christmas in a box'

She sounds thick as shit

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 01/01/2024 18:41

MrsSparkington · 01/01/2024 18:35

I'd have uninvited them as soon as MIL said 'Christmas in a box'

She sounds thick as shit

Or she just misunderstood what had been ordered.

ColleenDonaghy · 01/01/2024 18:55

MrsSparkington · 01/01/2024 18:35

I'd have uninvited them as soon as MIL said 'Christmas in a box'

She sounds thick as shit

Why on earth would not knowing what ocado is make someone thick?

Morgysmum · 01/01/2024 18:59

I was invited to my grandmothers birthday party 90.
There were adults and kids, of varying ages. But the drink selection was crap for the non alcohol drinkers. 13 grand kids and my mum who doesn't drink alcohol as she has a sensitivity to it, I can drink, but i don't. There was 2 bottles of lemonade, and a bottle of orange squash. It wouldn't have killed them to have some blackcurrant juice, I prefer blackcurrant over orange, my son is the same. Or something other than lemonade, or more than 2 bottles, as most of the non alcohol drinks had gone about an hour into a party, which was 3 hours long.

Gettingbysomehow · 01/01/2024 19:03

Well it's your own fault for hosting wankers when you have your hands full already with your own children. Why can't you just have a quiet family Xmas with your own children at home. I cannot understand this requirement to half kill yourself when you are pregnant.

MrsSparkington · 01/01/2024 19:07

@ColleenDonaghy it's got nothing to do with Ocado. It's to do with thinking Xmas would come in a 'box'. It's just a weird/thick thing to say!

Keepingitmoving · 01/01/2024 19:07

i feel your pain! One year in laws were having Xmas day and Boxing Day with us and asked what they could bring. As we had everything for
Christmas Day my dh asked if they would bring some nice bits for Boxing Day breakfast - croissants, pancakes etc. They turned up with a defrosted loaf of white bread from their freezer….

Riapia · 01/01/2024 19:14

Typical MN MIL.
She’s just following the rules.
MN rule 15a all MIL’s must be mean/ obnoxious.

jools7 · 01/01/2024 19:16

She said the agreed to bring drinks

Easipeelerie · 01/01/2024 19:18

You don’t have to have Christmas with people like this.

ColleenDonaghy · 01/01/2024 19:23

MrsSparkington · 01/01/2024 19:07

@ColleenDonaghy it's got nothing to do with Ocado. It's to do with thinking Xmas would come in a 'box'. It's just a weird/thick thing to say!

It reads to me and several other posters that she thought Ocado is a meal prep service rather than a supermarket. She thought OP had ordered pre prepared food that just needed to be bunged in the oven.

Like when people would say "I think I'll get it all from Marks and Spencer" back when marks just just did posh ready meals.

Original poster
CheshGirl · 01/01/2024 19:24

Ecghelpplease · 31/12/2023 22:05

Not the point of the thread @CheshGirl but did you post once about having to drive some fish fingers down the M6 🤣

Yes - sounds like me.
I spent half of my working career chauffeuring food for my son to his own grandparents house.
Grin

OP posts:
DoodlesMam · 01/01/2024 19:25

wow. Shes a meany pants.

Beautiful3 · 01/01/2024 19:44

3 bottles of pop and 4 bottles of wine?

MoonWoman69 · 01/01/2024 19:44

Hee hee! I remember them, Christmas staples in the 70's!!! Happy memories! ❤

RocketDog101 · 01/01/2024 19:45

...penis beaker...waahhhhh! Lol memor-rieeeees

MoonWoman69 · 01/01/2024 19:57

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Nice one!!! If you know, you know!!!

hot2trotter · 01/01/2024 20:26

You knew all this about them already - more fool you for hosting them. I take it you won't make the same mistake again.

Pottlee · 01/01/2024 20:27

With regards to the “Christmas in a box” comment - Did she maybe think Ocado was like a Hello Fresh food delivery thing?

Original poster
CheshGirl · 01/01/2024 20:38

@Pottlee she looked down on that it was ordered online, and some bits were M&S and prepped (only sprouts and cabbage!)

OP posts:
Salome61 · 01/01/2024 21:04

So horrible, I am sorry. My MIL was the bitch from hell, I still can't understand how my husband was so lovely considering he'd been brought up by her.

GrottySnotty · 01/01/2024 21:16

Maybe she was thinking of ‘Christmas in a van’ 😂 (Good life Christmas special 1977).

Sorry OP they sound unbearably tight!

I guess if you ever invite them again you’ll have to spell it quantities.

My SIL is a bit like this - I was cooking for ten - she declared that she would do pudding (didn’t ask her to but thank you). She turned up with a small tub of supermarket value vanilla ice cream and a packet of biscuits (money most definitely not a problem - she is just embarrassingly tight and horribly passive aggressive). I find the behaviour so bizarre.

Thefsm · 02/01/2024 00:29

My in laws hosted us and paid for all the food etc which was lovely. The thing I would like to rant about is that my mother in law called my sons girlfriend fat and went on a fatist tirade which thank god she didn’t hear because my son would never have spoken to his grandmother again. She also mentioned casually while I was making breakfast for myself that she was disappointed I hadn’t taken the events of last Christmas as an opportunity to make life changes because maybe my husband would t have had his head turned if I lost weight and kept a tidier house. Bear in mind last Christmas I found proof he was having an affair with his coworker and ended up spending new year in a psych ward for my own safety as I was so broken. She also likes to mention that it was a terrible waste of money doing that and I should have just come to her house instead.

oh and my father in law who is usually lovely refused to call my oldest by their chosen name or pronouns and told my husband we were stupid for coddling them and allowing them to think they were trans. So weird and not like his normal mild mannered character.

such a relief to be done for another year.

Foxyaus · 02/01/2024 01:25

My in-laws are lovely but MY family are another thing - my sister "forgot" to bring the lamb roast for Christmas lunch three years running and the fourth year, when we were having a picnic lunch at a local park (Australia) she brought 2 tiny pieces of steak and 2 little potatoes, for a family of four. Both parents were on very good incomes and did not even bring a drink for their DC - on a 35'C day!
My Dsis would also disappear into the loo when it was time to do the dishes.
After all the other neices and nephews had opened their gifts, Dsis brought out huge sacks of age inappropriate gifts for her two, and the other little ones had to sit and watch them be opened.
Needless to say, that only happened once.
This year, we cancelled hosting and stayed home, it was wonderful.

QueenMegan · 02/01/2024 01:44

Just set your boundaries stick to them. I don't understand why you drove down the motorway with fish fingers but if it's to feed your child then why not just do a delivery. Maybe she didn't really want to look after your child.

Or employ a child minder. Be clear on expectations.

Don't have them again for Xmas and just say no to your non alcohol drinks. They sound like they make you miserable so don't bother