To think they should have cancelled?

[Madwife123]

We invite DSIL and family for Christmas every year. They arrive Christmas Eve morning and stay until Boxing Day as they travel 3 hours to us.

We both have children, similar age and it works well for us as we have the bigger house to put them up and they enjoy not having the cooking etc.

Anyway, they arrived this morning as planned but nearly 2 hours late. Apologised for being late and explained they had to keep pulling over as nephew has a vomiting bug and was being sick.

Why on earth did they still come!!

I have expressed I’m not happy they still came and their response was, they have no Xmas food in as they had planned to come to us and they can’t just cancel Christmas.

I think it’s really selfish to come and infect all my household and am pretty pissed off. Partner thinks I’m overreacting and it will be fine.

My sister did this - arrived with the baby after a long drive and announced baby had been sick all night - I was annoyed - by evening sister puking, then her DH, they left and went home but we ALL got it, I was absolutely furious!!! So utterly, utterly selfish. In the past we all came down with Norovirus on Xmas eve and had to postpone the great big Christmas dinner until New Year's eve - managed to let everyone know just before the shops shut!!

This reminds me of the time my in laws asked to come stay the night after a flight that arrived into the local airport late night. When they were all settled into the guest room and asked how their trip had been they were telling me it was awful as there accommodation had a bad bed bug infestation!!

How we didn't end up with one ourselves was a miracle. I probably should have kicked them out but I was just too shell shocked to know what to do!

I am so angry on your behalf OP but understand how hard it is to force them to leave.

When I was a child, we were always the ones who hosted for Christmas because we had the biggest house. One of my cousins brought a D&V bug with him (similar length journey, and similar throwing up story). Within 48 hours every single person apart from me had come down with it. It was the Christmas from Hell. You have my wholehearted sympathy, OP.

YANBU.

I threw up yesterday morning and tested positive for Covid yesterday afternoon (gastrointestinal issues apparently an uncommon symptom). Christmas visits/ hosting are all cancelled as whatever it was, I wouldn't want to pass it on.

It could be anything. They're very selfish for still coming to visit you. The shops are open today so I'm sure they could have got something and had a lovely Christmas at home.

Fucking hell. I'd have asked them to go right back home again.

Appalling behaviour.

OP somewhere around 9.00 tonight do you think you could convincingly start being sick? Rushing off to the bathroom with added retching noises?

Wow that's so selfish of them, tell them to leave op.

I’d guess poor OP won’t have to fake it in a few days 😭

What's wrong with people?

Since contagion happens before symptoms appear, chances are one or more of SiL's family is already spreading germs.

It may be too late, but I'd be insisting they wear masks (DH and I would probably wear masks also due to both of us having compromised immunity) and I'd insist on frequent hand washing and have anti-bac hand wipes or gel in every room. In short, I'd 'reinstitute' all the old Covid protocols. I'd also set up a card table for them away from the main diners since gathering around a table would be a huge 'spreader'. I'd also use separate serving dishes and utensils. If nothing else, the 'inconveniences' would remind them of what idiots they've been

I realize this may sound like overkill to some people, but to tell the truth DH and I have noticed that we've gotten fewer colds & sickness bugs since we've adopted the custom of masks in crowded settings. Where we live no on thinks twice about it.

I can't believe anyone could be so selfish.

That's incredibly selfish, not just to potentially inflict everyone else with the bug, but to drag the poor boy across the country when he just wants to be at home in his own bed.

It might just be something he’s eaten, kids are often sick, there’s no saying anyone else will catch it.

If DH is colluding with their selfishness he can be on mopping up and disinfectant duty.

I agree that I’d another one of them shows signs of being ill, they go home. As it is proof that whatever is going on is infectious.

Selfish and to make their son travel when he's obviously not well. My DD ended up in hospital fighting for her life because a parent sent their child into school knowing he had been sick the night before. Said oh he seemed ok in the morning we thought it was something he ate. There's a 48 hour rule for a reason. Because my DD couldn't keep her meds down she ended up in hospital at first HDU then transferred to a children's hospital for intensive care.

Not too late to ask them to leave!

Bang goes your Christmas OP. Hope you've got plenty of bowls and buckets at the ready. Can you at least isolate them into a separate bathroom....

I absolutely agree they should have cancelled but we’ve managed previously where someone has a tummy bug and others haven’t caught it. Hopefully the same for you.
I do take charcoal tablets in this scenario as potentially good for stomach issues but even if only a placebo they make me feel better! Good luck!

If This happened to me I’d tell them to leave immediately and drive the 3 hours home

Very selfish towards you and their poor son.

We planned to visit family 4 hours away for Christmas, but DD has tonsillitis and was quite poorly this week so we had a contingency plan for if she was too unwell to travel. She isn't infectious (day 10 of tonsillitis now) but it didn't seem fair to make her travel if she was feeling unwell. We definitely wouldn't have gone anywhere if she'd had a sickness bug. Shops are open today so they could have got food in.

Selfish beyond belief. No consideration gor their sick child or anyone else. I would be raging

They should have phoned before setting off and given you a choice in this. Too late now as they are there, but I would be raging.
My brother has form for behaving similarly, turning up with a vomiting 3 year old who has then been 'banished' to a bedroom, which then meant SIL stayed there most of the time too.

Incredibly selfish .
My adult dd and ds were meant to visit yesterday but dd came down with it - I wouldn't even go to drop presents off - I hate sickness bugs , we will have our Xmas another day ! Why subject everyone else to catching it ? Selfish twats .

I'd be livid

Shops are open today so they could have picked up something to roast on the way home/some other bits

I'm emetophobic of other people's sick so I'd be panicking and stressing! I mentioned this thread to DH he's way more soft than me as he would be ok with it if already arranged?!

I'd be so angry it's selfish

I keep hearing how it’s not fair on their older child to miss out etc

But they don't care about your children missing out on any other Christmas plans you may have, like seeing your family in the days after Christmas Day. Arseholes

YANBU. I can’t imagine stilling going to stay with family knowing that my dc had a vomiting bug. I really hope the rest of your family don’t come down with it. Also your poor DN, can have been nice having to travel when he’s poorly, I’m sure he would have been better off staying at home. At the very least they should have been open with you beforehand and checked whether you would still be happy to come.