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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would you say yes if at front of line and was asked to let a disabled child first ?

230 replies

Nearlyfinished2023 · 19/12/2023 16:06

Today my DD with her aunt went to some Xmas pop up thing, which had a character meet n Greet with one of her fav characters.
her rang me on the way home whilst I was talking with a friend and said how when they got there the line was massive and she took DD to the front to speak to the lady ( DD has visible tubes ) to ask how long the wait was in which they replied 2 hours. Aunt told DD there was no way she would stand in that cold for 2 hours and that maybe they could do something else. The worker then asked the front people if they didn’t mind if they Let her quickly run in to do the meet and greet, they were fine with this and DD got to go in.
my friend was mortified 😂 she was like I would be fuming and what about the people behind the first family what if they cared ?
she thinks it was very unfair as it was such a long line that everyone had to wait.
would you have minded ?

OP posts:
Giggorata · 19/12/2023 17:24

I wouldn’t mind - but it's kind of embarrassing for the staff to have to ask the queue if they mind. I would prefer it to be a stated policy that disabled people who can't stand or be in the cold go first.

IveOnlyEverHeardOutwithONHere · 19/12/2023 17:25

No, of course not. It would be a right miserable bastard who would.

TiredCatLady · 19/12/2023 17:26

Wouldn’t have minded at all. Glad your DD got to enjoy it.

SiliconHeaven · 19/12/2023 17:26

The problem with allowing or asking the general public if they mind is it gives them a chance to decide who is deemed to be worthy of such special treatment.

I often find myself falling short in the 'worthy of compassion' stakes so I am sensitive to this.

The poorly looking child with the visible tubes provokes an almost universal response of 'of course we would let them jump the queue' the middle aged woman in a wheelchair with a resting bitch face not so much, I find.
Best to find another way to organise it.

itsmylife7 · 19/12/2023 17:26

brickastley · 19/12/2023 17:23

@itsmylife7

Ridiculous question.

A child with tubes and/or in a wheelchair needs no explaining.

And a child with a non visible disability doesn't need explaining to you either. My question wasn't ridiculous.

I've really got nothing to say , apart from I don't remember asking you to explain anything to me .

AGirlWithAHandOnHerArm · 19/12/2023 17:27

I would not have minded at all - I hope your daughter had fun!

BerriesNutsConkers · 19/12/2023 17:28

Letsgetouttahere2023 · 19/12/2023 16:11

That's unfair. If your dd isn't well enough to wait you should have arranged with the organisers to come back at another scheduled time rather than let her push in front of little kids who've been waiting 2hrs in the cold, that's out of order

Wow, where is your empathy and Christmas spirit?

I would have gladly waited a few minutes more.

brickastley · 19/12/2023 17:28

@itsmylife7

I've really got nothing to say , apart from I don't remember asking you to explain anything to me .

You mean you have nothing to say becsue you know your comment was awful.

Clarinet1 · 19/12/2023 17:28

I wouldn’t have minded at all and I don’t think I’d be letting the friend take your DD on any similar trips out without you!

LightDrizzle · 19/12/2023 17:29

It’s normal in Portugal. There are usually signs and people will gesture for you to go to the head of the table queue.

Teddleshon · 19/12/2023 17:29

My goodness, who in their right mind wouldn’t let a disabled child go ahead of them. They could have used the extra queuing time to count their blessings.

Clarinet1 · 19/12/2023 17:30

PS at this time of year puts me in mind of Tiny Tim - “God bless us every one!”

Mulhollandmagoo · 19/12/2023 17:30

It puts everyone back in the queue by five minutes, if that! Whereas it would be the difference between your daughter being able to partake in the activity or not, so of course she should have been able to slip in the front of the line. Amazing way to teach those kids about inclusivity and kindness too!

Your friend is BU!

Digestivechocolatebiscuit · 19/12/2023 17:30

No not at all.. some children have hidden disabilities.. ( Sunflower lanyard is brilliant).. or maybe phone ahead.... places make provisions.
Your friend needs educating.

GreatAuntMaude · 19/12/2023 17:32

Teddleshon · 19/12/2023 17:29

My goodness, who in their right mind wouldn’t let a disabled child go ahead of them. They could have used the extra queuing time to count their blessings.

I am sorry to pick on you but no. My disabled kids are blessings. The neurodivergent ones and the one with an incurable health condition. I know you mean well. But we don't need pity. Really.

Original poster
Nearlyfinished2023 · 19/12/2023 17:32

The reason I mention her tube is visible was because obviously she didn’t actually asked she just asked the length of time and then spoke to DD. Weirdly her visible tube is the least “ bothersome one “ she has quite a few under her clothes ( IV line ) etc which you would never know about. So I understand that not all disabilities are visible.

OP posts:
Lochness1975 · 19/12/2023 17:33

I wouldn’t mind. I let a disabled man go in front of me and book in whilst I had my covid jab, then held his place in the queue whilst he sat down. He was visually disabled and in pain. I think we should all give each other a helping hand. Simple act of kindness can mean a lot to someone else.

brickastley · 19/12/2023 17:33

Teddleshon · 19/12/2023 17:29

My goodness, who in their right mind wouldn’t let a disabled child go ahead of them. They could have used the extra queuing time to count their blessings.

Christ yes. These poor disabled children let's all be blessed not to have those. Sad

Echobelly · 19/12/2023 17:33

Yes, I'd always understand someone with a disability having a need to not wait for things - my mum's in that position and has an invisible disability so sometimes has to deal with nasty comments when she gets to skip a queue, so I am totally on the side of people who aren't able to stand etc.

FilthyforFirth · 19/12/2023 17:34

I wouldn't have minded at all and would have happily let her go in front. Some people are so miserable.

Lilibert456 · 19/12/2023 17:35

I would not mind at all. I hope your daughter enjoyed herself.

Treesinmygarden · 19/12/2023 17:36

Letsgetouttahere2023 · 19/12/2023 16:11

That's unfair. If your dd isn't well enough to wait you should have arranged with the organisers to come back at another scheduled time rather than let her push in front of little kids who've been waiting 2hrs in the cold, that's out of order

Aren't you just lovely!

Unitedthebest · 19/12/2023 17:37

@Letsgetouttahere2023 well aren’t your children going to grow up to be kind, empathetic individuals…😳no hope for them is there 🤔

Original poster
Nearlyfinished2023 · 19/12/2023 17:38

I don’t don’t find the count the blessing thinkg offensive tbh … I love DD more than the world it self and she is an absolute blessing in every way. That’s not how I take that comment …. I would take it has count their blessings that they have healthy children. I would cure my daughter tomorrow if I could and make her healthy … not because I don’t love her but because she endures so much and the risk of losing her over the years of course I wish she didn’t have her condition.

OP posts:
peachgreen · 19/12/2023 17:38

Anyone who would mind is an arsehole, pure and simple.