To think Boxing Day is for family and not football?

[Felicityfennel]

So sick of it! Every year, DH and DS want to go to DH’s hometown to watch the Boxing Day game. Plans have to be worked around this and given it’s an 8 hour round trip, it’s pretty much an overnight stay. If we’re with the in-laws for Christmas, fine, crack on. But when we’re in our home town and have other family to see, really?! It also means an early night Christmas Day as they want to be up and out to get to the game on Boxing Day the next morning 😭

He is spending it with family...with his son.
For us BD is the day we see OH mum...but that doesn't require travelling. It normally (especially when kids were younger) involves an early start and a long walk somewhere for fresh air.

When I was younger we would have family round, but often had to wait for them to have been shopping in the sales fist.

Lounging around and eating chocolate is never something done for a full day, and is not fun for the kids. It's boring and really screws up any sleeping for rest of the week.

Your DH is starting a tradition your DS will remember. My DH always went to football with his dad as a child and continued to attend the Boxing Day game with him as an adult, right up until his dad died. He has lovely memories of it, and takes our DS's to continue the tradition.
It could be worse- your DH could be into a hobby where he leaves you with the kids and doesn't involve them, making no effort to spend time with them/ develop a shared interest.

Boxing Day is 100% for football. The family can do their own thing 🤷

Boxing Day football CAN be a family thing. You can all go and watch it, soak up the atmosphere, have a pie and a nice alcoholic drink! Then come home and take it easy.
Personally I like it, probably because I've grown up in a football family.
But the thought of another Christmas dinner with another bunch of family, round a table with the kids beginning to act up after being stuck in the day before.. I'd take football!

Football matches locally, yes for certain.

The one traditional Boxing Day activity I would like to end is large shop openings for sales, which probably started before Christmas or are only in reality a few items. Give more people a chance just to have a day off, whatever they decide to do or not do.

Plan what around them?

They're out all day.

Do what ever you want. Have family over, go out, take the other 2 swimming... watch TV all day...do whatever you want.

Why do they have to be there for family to drop by?

I can take or leave football and I resent it dominating my weekends but Boxing Day matches are a big Christmas tradition and they want to do it so let them crack on I say.

Boxing Day football is a thing. We don’t get to go often but it’s always one of my favourite games.

Your post smacks of “I don’t like it, therefore nobody else should do it”. You can sit around eating chocolates in your PJ’s another day. Sounds like a boring Boxing Day to me, but each to their own.

I get you OP and would feel the same. I wouldn’t expect to run a marathon every Boxing Day and assume my family would be happy to fit around my hobby every single year. We tend to spend Boxing Day with family or friends rather than just us relaxing at home though.

I've sod yanbu but only because of the travelling. Should be able to go to amatch locally. I'm in Manchester and if you can get a ticket going to matches are greT for those who like it but usually manage a festive family meal of some sort too.

Running a marathon is a solitary event though, the dad is taking his son to the football, its a famiy event

Sitting around in PJs eating chocs and waiting for some random relative to arrive is not a family event

And that’s fine that you feel differently to me.

I think the issue here is probably that they have to travel so far to the football. Most people will only be away from home from 2-6 to go to the match, so of course it's a perfectly reasonable thing to do, and there's plenty of the day left.
But the match affects OP from Christmas night until the 27th. She has to have the other kids on her own, and her family don't get to visit them all.

So yes, I'm torn. On the face of it it's a nice tradition, but it impacts OP more than it does most people on this thread.

So you would rather your DS sit around all day doing fuck all instead of having a great time watching the footy with his dad? I shall look forward to your post in a couple of weeks about how sulky your DH and DS were over Christmas and how they "ruined Boxing Day" for you.

To all the people saying, "it's tradition", I think starting a tradition is exactly what the OP is worried about.

Try to put yourselves in the shoes of one of the many millions of people who don't give a shit about football and ask yourselves whether you would be happy for half your family to go halfway across the country EVERY Boxing Day to watch some men kick a ball around a field.

It would be more reasonable for them to do it only in years they spend Christmas with the in laws and the match is local, or find an alternative team to support on Boxing Day that doesn't involve an 8 hour round trip.

Of course you're being unreasonable. And a bit of a controlling arse too.

You don't have to work around anything. You want to laze about eating chocolate in your pj's all day, which is fine. No planning required. Your family are still able to maybe pop in, are they not? Or does your front door seal shut whenever the full family cohort isn't present to welcome visitors?

You each get to do whatever you want without impacting the other. You also each get to see your respective parents, and have bonding time with your children. What's not "family" about that?

And it's never bloody happened before so you're being unreasonable for implying otherwise. Dramatic, controlling and bang out of order.

I don’t give a shit about football, but can see what a lovely tradition it could be for a father to take their children to the Boxing Day match each year.

The OP wants to lounge about in pyjamas eating chocolate, and no one is stopping her. To me, that is a shit tradition, but different people like different things!

Yes but is it a lovely tradition for the spouse and children who aren't football fans to be left for 24 hours every Boxing Day meaning that there isn't even the possibility of them doing anything else together as a whole family?

Not so much.

’Find an alternative team to support’

🤣🤣🤣

I could no more support a new team than grow a new head. You don’t generally chop and change your teams based on your geography and if you do, you aren’t likely to be your average match going supporter.

< shrugs >

As far as anyone who doesn't care about football is concerned this is a completely imaginary problem and shouldn't be made into their actual real problem by family members who want every Christmas to revolve around their hobby.

So 1 year you visit oil and dad/son go iff and leave you with your in-laws. You don't see your family.

Following year, you can see your family Boxing Day but again, father/son off to go to football and see the pil. Your family don't get to see either.

Your Boxing Day enough get to wrangle the younger kids. Or stay with in laws which is ever that fun without the actual child of the in law.

It doesn't sound particularly fair. Pil get to see their son every year and your family get your grandson never?

You want to sit on the sofa in your pjs, they want to go and watch football. Seems like you both have what you want on Boxing Day. Why do you need them at home to watch tv with you? Seems quite selfish.

I hate football, but no one is requiring me to play it or watch it. Boxing Day is for whatever you fancy. For me, weather permitting, it’s for climbing a mountain that requires a pre-dawn start.

🤷🏼‍♀️ this is the first year the OP’s poor husband has tried to do it and she’s already kicking off. It’d be far more practical to find a new wife than a new football team.

I can't believe this team has a home match every single Boxing day. And as for "find an alternative team to support" 🤣🤣🤣