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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Boxing Day is for family and not football?

348 replies

Felicityfennel · 17/12/2023 19:38

So sick of it! Every year, DH and DS want to go to DH’s hometown to watch the Boxing Day game. Plans have to be worked around this and given it’s an 8 hour round trip, it’s pretty much an overnight stay. If we’re with the in-laws for Christmas, fine, crack on. But when we’re in our home town and have other family to see, really?! It also means an early night Christmas Day as they want to be up and out to get to the game on Boxing Day the next morning 😭

OP posts:
WhereIsBebèsChambre · 19/12/2023 07:07

Do the rest of the family get to choose if they partake in the forced jollity at home?
'Right get up, do NOT get changed or have actual breakfast, you WILL sit on that sofa in your pj's and eat chocolate ALL DAY, like it or not!!'

bastin · 19/12/2023 07:13

The football on Boxing Day is the highlight for many over the Christmas period

Stupidliefromfriend · 19/12/2023 07:28

Let them go with love OP. It's a lovely thing for them to do together including the travel. Build traditions of your own for boxing day.

gannett · 19/12/2023 07:40

I'm a football hater and even I a) know how important Boxing Day football is, and b) would rather go to a match than be kept at home for enforced "lounging around and eating chocolate" which is something I can do at any time. If I married a football fan I would also expect to have to take football schedules into account in my life because that's part and parcel of his life. If you don't want football in your life don't marry a football fan.

Also fail to see how your husband and son going to the football means you have to plan around it at all? You don't have to go, you get to lounge around and eat chocolate if you want.

Coffeeismyfriend1 · 19/12/2023 08:30

DH always used to go, I made plans to see
my folks and they did food for us all when DH got back. It was important to him, Boxing Day is a big football day. At the moment our kids are a bit young to go to football and he works Boxing Day now.

Metallicant · 19/12/2023 08:53

I thinks it’s brilliant if some of the family go out on Boxing Day, by that stage I’ve had more than enough of people and relish some quiet time to watch a film or read a book.

plus your dh and ds are doing something they enjoy together, which is really important. That won’t last forever.

ChristmasSugarplumFairy · 19/12/2023 09:01

I see your Boxing Day match and raise you Christmas fucking Eve.
He's not even taking any of his children. I'll be at home wrestling with all three of them alone instead of having the nice chilled out family day I had I mind when I saw it fell on a Sunday this year (none of the clock watching waiting to be allowed to leave bullshit like when it's a working day).
Not impressed.

ActDottie · 19/12/2023 09:40

Wouldn’t bother me there’s lots of other day between Christmas and new year to see family.

BitOutOfPractice · 19/12/2023 09:48

@ChristmasSugarplumFairy my team is playing on Christmas Eve evening. It’s appalling and I say that as a pretty obsessive football fan. I feel particularly sorry for away fans. There’s been an outcry but it’s fallen on deaf ears.

northernbeee · 19/12/2023 10:19

I'm not a football fan but if DH and DS were, then the Boxing Day match is quite a big thing.

lorn195 · 19/12/2023 10:27

It wouldn't bother me at all as DH isn't into football. DS16 on the other hand is, so he would either be watching a match ( which I suspect he will be looking at the local fixture for Boxing Day) or refereeing. Thankfully for the latter he's put himself as unavailable which means no mums taxi for me 😊

Khara · 19/12/2023 10:48

Count yourself lucky - they used to play matches on Christmas Day and only stopped in the 60s I believe.

Sartre · 19/12/2023 11:06

Don’t really care about Boxing Day so I wouldn’t be overly bothered about this. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are the major family days imo, Boxing Day is always depressing overspill.

Daftasabroom · 19/12/2023 11:12

@Felicityfennel I think you should go for a Boxing Day cold water swim just to show them who's really boss.

ChristmasSugarplumFairy · 19/12/2023 11:25

BitOutOfPractice · 19/12/2023 09:48

@ChristmasSugarplumFairy my team is playing on Christmas Eve evening. It’s appalling and I say that as a pretty obsessive football fan. I feel particularly sorry for away fans. There’s been an outcry but it’s fallen on deaf ears.

That's really shitty. Why do they do it?
Ours is 12.00 kick off, opposition less than an hour away, but with all the faffing around with the supporters bus he'll be away most of the day.
I do understand that a person can get another spouse easier than another football team but JFC sometimes I do question the priority list.

BitOutOfPractice · 19/12/2023 11:43

ChristmasSugarplumFairy · 19/12/2023 11:25

That's really shitty. Why do they do it?
Ours is 12.00 kick off, opposition less than an hour away, but with all the faffing around with the supporters bus he'll be away most of the day.
I do understand that a person can get another spouse easier than another football team but JFC sometimes I do question the priority list.

Show quote history

They do it for money, tv money. Not for the fans that’s for sure.

MadisonAvenue · 19/12/2023 12:12

Remember the signs on stands during the pandemic? Football without fans is nothing, or words to that effect.
That was soon forgotten.

The Christmas Eve game is probably a trial to see how it works out before putting it as a game day next season.

I’ve just looked at the Boxing Day fixtures in the PL. Forest supporters have got to travel to Newcastle, Google says that’s a road journey of 3+ hours and of course there are no trains that day. Same kind of travel time for Sheffield United supporters to drive to Luton.

StaunchMomma · 19/12/2023 12:19

Oh I LOVE Boxing Day footie - but from the sofa, with a lap full of snacks.

Is there really much difference between Boxing Day and the day after Boxing Day? If your DH looks forward to it and you don't have any specific plans for BD other than lounging around the house I'd just tell them to go and insist they're home for a cosy family day the day after.

They can't change the date of the football but you can change the family day.

Boxing day isn't really that special, is it?

Toomanypetpeeves · 19/12/2023 12:25

It seems to me there's a tradition and family time going..you just seem to be excluded.

Football is a massive thing on boxing day why don't you embrace it and have some quality time them?

Remmy123 · 19/12/2023 12:26

We are going to Boxing Day match it was my idea as I can't handle being stuck in for two days but it wiii only take a few hours out of our day

peakygold · 19/12/2023 12:33

When my children were little, Boxing Day meant sitting on the in-laws' sofa for hours, whilst everyone watched football matches on the telly. One memorable year there were three matches, back to back, involving teams which no-one in the room supported. But they sat, goggle-eyed, at pundits and players for freakin' hours. I despise football and soon learnt to take the kids bikes with us, and get to know the local walks. YANBU.

ihavespoken · 19/12/2023 13:17

Goodlard · 18/12/2023 18:23

Your DIL sounds utterly controlling, I would've advised my DS to run a mile!

Show quote history

No she doesn't!! I am very much on the football-supporting OP-is-wrong side here, but @Pottedpalm 's DIL was just making sure that she and the DS had interests in common before their relationship got going in earnest - very sensible! She wasn't trying to control him, just working out if they'd be compatible 🙄

Goodlard · 19/12/2023 13:22

@ihavespoken no she didn't, she based her desire to be a good husband as not liking football!

He could kind
Generous
Loyal
Good work ethic
13 inch dick

But if he liked football he was not an option!

Weird!

mondaytosunday · 19/12/2023 13:24

Sounds like a lovely father/son thing and I'd encourage it. My son lost his Dad at 6, and I can tell you if my beloved husband was alive today I'd do anything to foster this kind of thing. Lounging around eating chocolates (and being bored) doesn't sound that fun in comparison at all.

ihavespoken · 19/12/2023 13:43

@Goodlard but you have to get along with the person you're spending your life with. If starting from scratch I would not choose to date someone who didn't support my team, still less someone who wasn't interested in football at all!
No point compromising at the start