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Original poster

To ask if you have sex on your period

324 replies

Toothurtyoclock · 10/12/2023 21:47

Regular user but name changed for this.

I had a day out with a friend yesterday and we had a lot of girl chat. Somehow or another I said something along the lines of 'but I was on my period, so obviously we didn't have sex'. My friend was genuinely surprised by this and that I've never had sex on my period, ever. Not with DH, nor anyone prior. Honestly, it's not something I've even considered doing, kind of like one of the rules of life, death, taxes and can't have sex on your period. My friend says this is not her experience at all and says bar maybe the first few days when it's at it's heaviest and she feels the most uncomfortable, she and her DH have sex as much as they otherwise would.
I spoke about it with DH to ask his thoughts and he's in the same boat as me, says he's just always assumed you don't do that and the few guy friends he has that he does talk about sex with, they don't have sex with their wives or girlfriends on their period either.
I don't actually have many friends that I speak this openly about sex to so was just wondering what the wise women of Mumsnet think.

Honestly, I feel like crap the first few days of my period but after that, I feel my normal self and it annoys me that I 'can't' have sex for the next 4 or 5 days so maybe this is something I need to reconsider but it's something I've not even considered before, I just always assumed it not done and never challenged it. Now I feel a bit foolish as I can't now work out how I really feel about it. DH says he's up for giving it a go if I'm comfortable with it but I don't know if I am yet.

OP posts:
beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:00

Keilagh · 10/12/2023 22:58

Me and my ex always had sex 3-4 times a week except during my time of the month. Finding period sex gross doesn’t mean you have a dead bedroom. What a strange assumption.

Show quote history

That wasn't the assumption at all. The dead bedroom comment was literally linked to people talking about being germphobic and not liking 'smells' when normal sex involves both of those. Try reading before responding.

SkySecret · 10/12/2023 23:00

@Peablockfeathers I use a cup which has allowed me to learn a lot about my period, and one thing I have learnt is that it doesn’t smell at all. If I stick my nose a centimetre away from it (poured into my hand in the shower) I can smell an INCREDIBLY faint iron smell. That’s it, nothing else whatsoever. DP and I can look like we’ve just left a murder scene, but we can’t fucking smell it ffs 😂😂 it’s definitely not that strong!

mrlistersgelfbride · 10/12/2023 23:01

I don't have sex much anymore 😆 but when I was younger I would have had sex on my period, unless it was day 1 but thinking about it I've done that once or twice

It wouldn't be my preference but I don't mind it.

TooOldForThisNonsense · 10/12/2023 23:02

Not really now at 50, both sex and periods are less frequent than before! But yes I did used to. It never made any more mess than non period sex tbh!

ButterCupPie · 10/12/2023 23:02

One Saturday morning DH got out of bed to answer the door in his dressing gown to a (luckily, very cool) friend of mine who burst out laughing and said 'You've got blood all over your face'. We still grin about that 20 years on.

SylvieLaufeydottir · 10/12/2023 23:03

I don't get what all the urrghing is about. Yes, I do, and enjoy it. Orgasm is the best thing for cramps. Just chuck down a towel if it's a heavier day.

TheKeatingFive · 10/12/2023 23:04

Each to their own sort of situation really

Hopskiplou · 10/12/2023 23:04

Absolutely- it’s natures way of dealing with cramps! Never had a man bothered by it either.

TheLeadbetterLife · 10/12/2023 23:05

SylvieLaufeydottir · 10/12/2023 23:03

I don't get what all the urrghing is about. Yes, I do, and enjoy it. Orgasm is the best thing for cramps. Just chuck down a towel if it's a heavier day.

Came to post this video. Can't believe it took six pages.

SkySecret · 10/12/2023 23:06

Those who feel they have to have sex during a period strike me as rather lacking in self control and don't have much else to think about.

@LBFseBrom and you strike me as being a narrow minded and judgemental prude. You’ve no clue why anyone has period sex. I could go a week without sex when I’m not on my period because I don’t fancy it, but if I then fancy it when I’m bleeding, then I’ll do it. Take your ridiculous insults elsewhere 🤣

Mindovermatter247 · 10/12/2023 23:06

I actually had sex for the first time on my period, so my mum wouldn’t get suspicious… it was alright and I was nearly finished… I haven’t since, I don’t even like DP looking anywhere near me when I’m on these days.. 😂

Keilagh · 10/12/2023 23:07

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:00

That wasn't the assumption at all. The dead bedroom comment was literally linked to people talking about being germphobic and not liking 'smells' when normal sex involves both of those. Try reading before responding.

Show quote history

Yes and I’m one of those people who wouldn’t enjoy a period blood aroma when having sex. It’s really not linked to dead bedrooms at all 🤣

I read it perfectly fine mate

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:08

Keilagh · 10/12/2023 23:07

Yes and I’m one of those people who wouldn’t enjoy a period blood aroma when having sex. It’s really not linked to dead bedrooms at all 🤣

I read it perfectly fine mate

Show quote history

You are literally still not reading it. I am not linking not enjoying period sex to dead bedrooms. I am linking the pearl clutching about germs and smells to dead bedrooms. Is that clear enough for you?

SheIsStuck23 · 10/12/2023 23:08

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 22:52

Agree you're not uptight if you don't enjoy it but let's be honest, the pearl clutching and downright weird comments from those who don't are just as bad...no wonder there's so many dead bedrooms with so many 'germaphobes' and people who 'don't like a smell'

Show quote history

A “dead bedroom” ?

What a really nasty and unnecessary comment written purposefully to try and sneer at women who don’t want to have sex whilst menstruating.

What next? Are you going to say that the women who don’t feel comfortable having sex on their periods are to blame if their partner starts complaining because he’s being denied sex? Maybe women should just do it regardless of how they feel because God Forbid they be responsible for a “dead bedroom”. They’re just asking to be cheated on….. 🙄

4kidsx · 10/12/2023 23:08

I do the last 2 days when there's barely anything there.

SylvieLaufeydottir · 10/12/2023 23:09

SylvieLaufeydottir · 10/12/2023 23:03

I don't get what all the urrghing is about. Yes, I do, and enjoy it. Orgasm is the best thing for cramps. Just chuck down a towel if it's a heavier day.

🤔and yes, I have "real" periods (haven't used hormonal contraception in about 15 years) and for sure I don't use a cup during. The fuck?

FreshWinterMorning · 10/12/2023 23:09

@endofthecorridoor · Today 22:02

I think the ladies who do maybe use a menstrual cup which makes it much less messy.

OMFG! 😆

DupontsYellowDressingGown · 10/12/2023 23:09

ToThineOwnSelf · 10/12/2023 22:31

Anyone seen Saltburn?! 🧛‍♀️

Was waiting for someone to mention this. Oliver would be well up for it

Whataretheodds · 10/12/2023 23:11

Yes. I have heavy periods but everything feels more sensitive, organised help enormously with the cramps and headaches.
It would put me off a guy if he were weird about it.

If people don't want to that's fine but it's grating when other women go on about it being disgusting or unthinkable: ridiculous judgement

FreshWinterMorning · 10/12/2023 23:12

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:00

That wasn't the assumption at all. The dead bedroom comment was literally linked to people talking about being germphobic and not liking 'smells' when normal sex involves both of those. Try reading before responding.

Show quote history

People are talking about the smells that you get when you're on your period .......🙄

Women don't smell the same when they're not on their period!

Maybe YOU should try reading before responding eh?

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:12

SheIsStuck23 · 10/12/2023 23:08

A “dead bedroom” ?

What a really nasty and unnecessary comment written purposefully to try and sneer at women who don’t want to have sex whilst menstruating.

What next? Are you going to say that the women who don’t feel comfortable having sex on their periods are to blame if their partner starts complaining because he’s being denied sex? Maybe women should just do it regardless of how they feel because God Forbid they be responsible for a “dead bedroom”. They’re just asking to be cheated on….. 🙄

Show quote history

I'm not sneering at people who don't like period sex but I am sneering at people moaning about 'germs' and 'smells' as if all sex doesn't have that anyway. And yep, I'd be happy to bet there's a strong correlation between those in dead bedrooms and those who are weirdly averse to germs and smells. The comments from people who don't like period shagging are just as sneery. I already said I don't think it's uptight if you don't like it, but there are just as weird, judgemental comments from people don't like it about those who do, as if not liking it makes you somehow 'cleaner' or 'purer' it's all very strange tbh.

Keilagh · 10/12/2023 23:12

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:08

You are literally still not reading it. I am not linking not enjoying period sex to dead bedrooms. I am linking the pearl clutching about germs and smells to dead bedrooms. Is that clear enough for you?

Show quote history

Nah you’re just repeating the same thing 🤣 As I said, I’m one of those ‘pearl clutching’ about the smell.

Your attitude comes across just as gross as your favourite bedroom activity.

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:13

Well my period really doesn't 'smell' as others have pointed out. Maybe all you wanging on about smells should try washing.

FreshWinterMorning · 10/12/2023 23:14

beanontoast · 10/12/2023 23:13

Well my period really doesn't 'smell' as others have pointed out. Maybe all you wanging on about smells should try washing.

Of course your period smells! 😆 Deluded much!

FourteenTog · 10/12/2023 23:14

Some religions have rules forbidding this. Personally I have a surge in desire around this time. Scientifically, a few orgasms will ease pain and cramps, and may be more intensely pleasurable...