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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH at woman's house after Xmas night out

384 replies

YouBelongWithMe · 10/12/2023 02:24

My DH was on his Xmas night out tonight. Started quite early and he said he'd be home about 11pm - did and does not matter to met at all that he decided to extend it to a big night.

I text at 1.50am to check all was okay, and he asked me to call him asap.

As I understand it, one of the women got so incredibly drunk that she was very ill and unsafe. Spewing and falling over as she made her way into a taxi. My DH has gone home with her to check she was okay

She's now passed out on her floor, having been sick everywhere. He says he's covered in her sick. He doesn't want to leave her because she lives alone and he's not sure that she's safe.

He thinks he should stay until morning,or until she wakes up at least.

What would your DH do in that situation?

OP posts:
SomeCatFromJapan · 10/12/2023 09:43

I'd be concerned that he's wide open to all sorts of accusations.

SgtBilko · 10/12/2023 09:45

If someone was that sick I’d call 111. People can inhale vomit in their sleep and die.

Viviennemary · 10/12/2023 09:48

I wouldn't believe this. Unless he has form for being incredibly naive and making daft decisions.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 10/12/2023 09:48

Think you both did well

Sebsaloysius · 10/12/2023 09:49

OftIwandered · 10/12/2023 03:04

Lovely to read a post that isn't full of drama from the OP. Obviously it's not great that this woman is so drunk but she has been taken home by a sensible, decent person who is trying to work out the best way to take care of her.

Absolutely second this, @OftIwandered

Tetchypants · 10/12/2023 09:51

Wow, I think some of the nastier comments here speak volumes about the posters and their relationships.

You and your husband did the right thing, OP. Not an ideal situation by any means, but I’d have been horrified if my husband had just abandoned a colleague/friend in that state. Shame the others left him to deal with her on his own.

Original poster
YouBelongWithMe · 10/12/2023 09:52

willWillSmithsmith · 10/12/2023 07:48

I’m pretty sure OP also said they got a taxi back🤔

Show quote history

Yeah I got it wrong initially. I thought they got a taxi, it was only when I picked him up that I learned about the lif and the new car.

He's text her, no reply. Probably still sleeping it off. If he doesn't hear soon he's going to see if anyone else has heard - she might be too embarrassed to text, but it would be good to know she's alright.

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 10/12/2023 09:52

Viviennemary · 10/12/2023 09:48

I wouldn't believe this. Unless he has form for being incredibly naive and making daft decisions.

OP said she went over there herself

Tetchypants · 10/12/2023 09:52

OhNoOhNo · 10/12/2023 09:43

I’d have called the police and left her there. I wouldn’t risk getting my car or clothes puked on by a drunk twat, especially as I’m teetotal. She made her choices.

Yeah, so what if she choked on her vomit and died.

FFS.

HangingOver · 10/12/2023 09:54

Well done OP and DH! This happened to a colleague of mine. He had to take her home and was offered a lift by a police van who could see he was struggling. She threw up all over him and the police van. I don't think she remembers the police bit though. 😬

Sharedcupboard · 10/12/2023 09:54

Viviennemary · 10/12/2023 09:48

I wouldn't believe this. Unless he has form for being incredibly naive and making daft decisions.

The OP went to the woman’s house to help. Did you actually read any of the thread or just make up shitty comments?

nutsnutspistachionuts · 10/12/2023 09:55

Things you want to find in your flat the next day after drunk puking:
Ibuprofen
Ribena
Pickled onion Monster Munch
Mike from Accounts

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/12/2023 09:56

Loonancy · 10/12/2023 05:22

Wow. Almost an opportunity for a couple of "what a nice guy" comments....

But it's MN so nope....

I can’t believe some of these comments accusing OP’s DH of all sorts.

I’d be mortified if I was the DH if something had happened to this woman (choked on her own vomit amongst other things) and he did the best thing in the end. The woman is bound to be mortified too, her drink could’ve been spiked or she could’ve reacted badly to medication. I was once on strong prescription painkillers which I thought would be fine to drink on (I’d done it before on non pres prescription painkillers) and I was as sick as a dog, far worse to when I usually got drunk, I was only 18 though in my defence! Never did it again!

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/12/2023 09:57

nutsnutspistachionuts · 10/12/2023 09:55

Things you want to find in your flat the next day after drunk puking:
Ibuprofen
Ribena
Pickled onion Monster Munch
Mike from Accounts

And ideally a fry up or a Maccie D’s brekkie.

Original poster
YouBelongWithMe · 10/12/2023 09:58

Those asking about medical training etc - no but he is first-aid trained. He probably did make some daft calls, but he had also been on his Christmas night and was also not sober! I think he did the best he could with what he had.

OP posts:
Chocbuttonsandredwine · 10/12/2023 09:59

Lol at all of the PP suggesting “phone an ambulance” people who’ve had strokes or have fallen and broken bones are waiting hours for a paramedic… I hardly think a pissed woman would be a priority.

also “contact someone in her phone” at 3am?? How many of the contacts in your phone Would you a) answer to at 3 am or b) go out to at 3am? (((Assuming you even lived close by)))

Fairytale land

OP you and your husband did the right thing.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/12/2023 10:00

Tetchypants · 10/12/2023 09:52

Yeah, so what if she choked on her vomit and died.

FFS.

Show quote history

It’s not even that anything can happen. Work colleagues of mine once told me of a work colleague of the boyfriend (city boy) who lived locally to us. Went out on Friday night work drinks one Christmas party season came back to his house/flat, fell down the stairs drunk and broke his neck. We were all very Shock as we used to see him sometimes on our commute to work if he was on the later train.

Justfinking · 10/12/2023 10:01

Tetchypants · 10/12/2023 09:51

Wow, I think some of the nastier comments here speak volumes about the posters and their relationships.

You and your husband did the right thing, OP. Not an ideal situation by any means, but I’d have been horrified if my husband had just abandoned a colleague/friend in that state. Shame the others left him to deal with her on his own.

Agree with this and its perfectly normal for a male and female to be platonic good friends!! I've been drunk many a time and have lost count of how many of my male colleagues have given me a lift home, nothing untoward has even happened because they are all decent men!

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 10/12/2023 10:01

YouBelongWithMe · 10/12/2023 09:58

Those asking about medical training etc - no but he is first-aid trained. He probably did make some daft calls, but he had also been on his Christmas night and was also not sober! I think he did the best he could with what he had.

He’s an angel 😇 OP, well done to him!

It reminds me, I should do a first aid course (did a St John’s Ambulance at work one years ago).

Original poster
YouBelongWithMe · 10/12/2023 10:03

And she's awake! Mortified, horrified, in need of a deep clean. Has just called him, fair play to her.

All is well that ends well.

I might go get him a McDonald's for his hangover, think he's earned it.

OP posts:
Natsku · 10/12/2023 10:03

Chocbuttonsandredwine · 10/12/2023 09:59

Lol at all of the PP suggesting “phone an ambulance” people who’ve had strokes or have fallen and broken bones are waiting hours for a paramedic… I hardly think a pissed woman would be a priority.

also “contact someone in her phone” at 3am?? How many of the contacts in your phone Would you a) answer to at 3 am or b) go out to at 3am? (((Assuming you even lived close by)))

Fairytale land

OP you and your husband did the right thing.

That's what my first aid course on Friday told me we should do. Granted I live somewhere the ambulance service isn't so stretched but in any case its still the right thing to do, even if the wait is long (and in the meantime keep them in the recovery position)

SwedishEdith · 10/12/2023 10:04

Gowlett · 10/12/2023 02:57

This happened to a guy at my work. He was in a total state. We brought him back to the office, which was nearby. Stripped him down ti his boxers & lay him on the floor. Had to phone his wife, and she had to get a cab over to collect him. But we were there with him while he was vomiting. It was grim…

I can't believe someone was stripped down to their underwear at work.

Natsku · 10/12/2023 10:04

Glad she's ok OP, I'm sure she won't be doing that again!

Incogg · 10/12/2023 10:05

I might go get him a McDonald's for his hangover, think he's earned it.

Me too :)

People are crazy thinking that the country has the resources for the police or ambulance to turn up for this kind of thing on a Saturday night.

Livebythecoast · 10/12/2023 10:05

I think your DH did the best thing he could at the time and I doubt he even thought about any accusations she could make (which I highly doubt she will). I imagine she'll be mortified this morning as well as feeling extremely ill 🤢