Regifted baby gift, is this off or am I just tired!

[Bluerose2]

Ok this is mostly lighted because clearly it’s not important and written by a very tired Mum of a newborn who is probably extremely irrational and over thinking everything! I received a gift from a friend which was obviously regifted as you can’t buy the brand anymore and it is completely the wrong season for baby and sized for a toddler, not a newborn. The family have a very nice life style, so it’s not that they couldn’t afford anything. I’m all for regifting but this is not something I can use and it’s totally obvious it wasn’t bought just now. Now I’ve got to take it to the charity shop and not the one in the small village we live in, in case she sees it there! I have always bought very nice thoughtful gifts for the children in this family as well. Is this a a little bit off or AIBU?

If it doesn’t fit your baby when the time comes, regift it! I’m sure that’s what they did. What’s the point of having lovely clothes that are never used? Might as well go to someone that can make use of them if you can’t. Better then binning lovely clothes. Although it looks like they didn’t think it through (but you can).

Now I’ve got to take it to the charity shop and not the one in the small village we live in,

So maybe she got it as a gift, didn't need it perhaps for the same reason you feel you won't need it, and regifted it. Very sensible.

You have already decided you won't need it so are passing it on too. She gave it as a gift and you're giving it to a charity shop but you're both passing it on. I can't see the problem.

Your baby might be that size in the summer. Clothes sizes aren't always that accurate and you don't know how your baby is going to grow .

I wouldn’t want a regift that baby won’t wear due to seasons. I have regifted appropriate items but have told the recipient. I would take it to the local charity shop so what if she sees it

So do I

I don’t think you are being unreasonable to be a little bit annoyed actually as it’s completely thoughtless to give you something you can’t use. But don’t waste any more thought on it, just take it to the charity shop and when it comes to gifts for that giver don’t think very carefully yourself (or at all). So much energy can be saved over this kind of thing!

It very likely will fit as toddler sizes last for a while. You never know where she got it from. Some small baby shops keep stock for ages.

You think. You might have a whopper like my son, he was in 12-18 months by 6 months, he skipped 9-12 months altogether so I was rather caught on the hop re clothes in the right size!
A gift is a gift. I’d say thank you, as I would with anyone else, and put it away for later.

Well you say that butttt I had a load of 12-18m summer clothes that my DD was crammed into on any vaguely warm April day as she was very tall / high centile so you don't know.

Personally I'd stick it in the a cupboard and stop with all the " now I have to go to a special charity shop the next town over" as if your friend is scouting the shop daily.

You could just as easily bin it.

That said yes, it's a bit off. BUT having kids myself sometimes I'm knackered and sometimes I regift and sometimes it's not perfect.... So 🤷‍♀️

I bought my son a lovely little rain coat in 18-24 months, with visions of him walking to nursery in it holding my hand down the road...

He had outgrown it by 9 months.

Given clothes don't go 'off' and assuming the item is BNWT, what is the issue? She might have a selection she bought, surely she spent money and time buying a gift..... nothing else to say,,,, you don't know it's a regift.
She didn't have to buy or give you anything

I re-gifted loads of stuff. I got given lots of cute little outfits for babies of various ages, but my kids mostly lived in baby-gros. I’d have nice outfits that I’d keep for special occasions, only to find they’d been outgrown before being worn. So if a friend had a baby, or their baby had a birthday, I’d give them one of my BNWT outfits. It makes sense financially and environmentally. I thought everyone did that!
OP you have no idea what the weather will be like when your baby fits the outfit.

Now I’ve got to take it to the charity shop and not the one in the small village we live in, in case she sees it there!
So what if she sees it. I got lots of christmas themed clothes for DC2, not in a size that would fit her until spring.

Don't take child sizes as a rule.

My 23 month old can still wear 12-18 month tops and needs 24-36 trousers.

I think YABU.

If it is sized for a toddler rather than a baby, how do you know it is the wrong season?

Babies' growth slows considerably after the first few months and when you have a newborn you really have no idea what size your baby will be wearing in which season when they are a toddler. So I would hang onto it and see whether it is appropriate for the season when it fits your child. Unless you don't like it, in which case feel free to regift it now.

I have a few really nice little things from an expensive brand which my daughter never got the chance to wear. I feel really guilty about it with regard to the people who gave them to us, but I have kept the tags on and plan to regift them because they will make a nice gift for somebody else and I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

You don't know that.

My baby was born in April and he was a tiny 6lb baby. I was given a summer dungaree set in size 6-9 months. He was 6-9 months between October and January so I thought I'd never use it, but he actually fit into it by July and did get to wear it for quite a while. And then his sister wore it two years later.

I always buy bigger sizes and carefully think of what season it will be when the child will be that size. I mostly buy hooded sweaters with a zip at the front as I found them so useful when my DD was little. I’d keep the outfit if I were you.

I think we've all done it.

Babies grow so quickly - who knows what will fit when. I was very precious about what DC wore when tiny and cast aside pretty much anything that wasn’t Petite Bateau or The Little White Company, but this was my weird post-natal obsession and nothing to do with the quality of the gifts received. Sell it on ebay if you don’t have space to store.

My mum gifted my newborn something she'd bought years previously in the hope I would have a child.

The item might have been the wrong season when it fitted her toddler, but she loved it & worked out it would probably fit your baby at the right time - maybe it was actually very thoughtful?

I've had 3 babies and the amount of people who buy 9-12/12-18 my god 🫠 it is SO annoying and you can tell the stuff is bought in the sales. I then have to store it for a year or so. I'm so ungrateful and aware of it but fgs don't bother if that's what you're sending 💀

Maybe they bought it new with tags from somewhere like Vinted? And if their children were all, say, wearing aged 12m clothes at 9m, maybe that’s why the size seems off? And as others have said, childcare is so expensive before they are 3, and even after that, that they may have to be more frugal than you think.

Has it definitely been regifted? A friend once suggested never buying newborn baby clothes (0-3 months) as a gift, as so many people did this when her daughter was born - the clothes ended up being donated after a few months. Instead, she suggested buying clothes for different stages within the first year - that way, the clothes were spread out over the year.

I used to work in a large shop that had a large baby/ children's department. A large part of my week was spent selling baby and children's clothes, toys etc. through the till, and then dealing with mums who had been given them and they were totally useless to them.

Why can't people just buy the parents a voucher, or ask them what they need?

It is also true OP that many well off people are the tightest gits I have ever come across. It is often those who have the least, share the most.

My DC used to go to a private school and at the Harvest Festival you would see the cheapest own brands donated, and my favourite, a food mountain of Angel Delight. If you can afford a Range Rover, you can afford a decent donation to a food bank. I remember once my DS had a birthday party and one very rich parent, I'm talking a millionaire, gave my DS a gift that looked like they had spent 50p on it. In fact, I was convinced they had got it in an arcade with their coupons. It collapsed when I opened it.

Take the baby gift and sell it on eBay or Vinted. Make a mental note of tight wads, and be less generous with them next time.