Bridezilla best friend

[Poshpaddington]

My best friend of 25 years is getting married in the new year. She’s always been “protective” of me, constantly texting & checking up on me, turning up at my door if I haven’t replied so she knows I’m ok etc. (drives me mad but it’s her).
Throughout this wedding planning she’s got worse and been quite mean towards me. My DP & MIL think she’s being controlling.
She asked my dress size, then disagreed that I was that size saying “you aren’t that small, absolutely not” then ordered my dress 2 sizes too bigger. I tried it on last night and it’s hanging off my shoulders, so I look like I’m a child playing dress up in my mums clothes 😂 she refuses to get it altered and won’t allow me to take it to get it done (she’s kept the dress with her).
Shes told me my hair is too short so expects me to buy extensions for her wedding - I have shoulder length hair.
She got mad at me as I didn’t buy the £200 shoes she’s wants me to wear but instead o found similar & in the exact same colour, just cheaper.
She made me pay £400 for my room at the venue as she wants me to stay the night before & wedding night. The venue is a 3 hour drive away.
she just text me saying that her fiancé will now be sleeping in my paid for room the night before & I need to sleep in her bed with her & her baby (wtf!?) and won’t pay for the sheets to be cleaned & changed as she doesn’t see an issue with it.
my DP of 10 years has only been invited to the evening part as she doesn’t want me distracted throughout the daytime (wtf!).
all the other bridesmaids have their partners attending the whole day, as I found out at the hen weekend.
she’s just told me she has a sash for me to wear at the wedding that says “no alcohol” so that the bar tenders only serve me soft drinks as she doesn’t want me to drink, at all, so I can help her all day.
i have allergies to food, which she knows about, but decided not to include that when booking the wedding food and just told me to “leave it on my plate” but I won’t physically be able to eat anything that has touched the food due to cross-contamination or I’ll be covered in hives 😣 & possible using my Epi pen.
The hen weekend was horrible - they all snubbed me the whole time. Nobody engaged in a conversation with me and every time I sat near any of them they moved away - my best friend told me it’s “because you aren’t a mum or married yet so it’s hard to relate to you” 🤔

would I be unfair to just leave this friendship after the wedding is over?

my MIL & DP don’t want me to even go to the wedding but I can’t let her down. It’s not fair. I really don’t want to go under all these circumstances but we do have a long friendship that I am honouring.

Don’t go! Cancel the cheque, I mean room 😏
If you do go, email the hotel now and tell them under no circumstances have you authorised any change to your room.

Struggling to believe this is real.

However, given I've some time on my hands, I've allowed my mind to wander.

To her face, between now and the wedding date, I'd play along with enthusiasm to everything she dictates. Everything.

In the background, I'd be:

• Cancelling the room and not telling her.
• Returning the shoes and not telling her.
• Not turning up on the day and not telling her.

If she's real, she's an abusive user. Time to play her game back at her.

Don't go OP. This isn't a friendship. She sounds controlling and nasty. You don't need this freak show in your life. Your partner and MIL are right. Drop her before the wedding.

'She’s always been “protective” of me, constantly texting & checking up on me, turning up at my door if I haven’t replied so she knows I’m ok etc. (drives me mad but it’s her).'

You have enabled her to behave like this.

Put your foot down and tell her to fuck off.

Learn to make boundaries so that people don't walk all over you.

Did she tattoo "mug" across your forehead too, OP? Cancel the hotel room, don't be her bridesmaid, don't go to the wedding, block her and never speak to her again. She clearly absolutely hates you.

She’s not a bridezilla, she’s a vile bully. Cancel the room, return the shoes and tell her you’re not going. Don’t be her doormat.

This cannot be real surely?!

Make a sash that says 'You are not my friend'. Then turn up at her door wearing it. Say nothing- just point at the sash. And then leave

Omg op this is nuts! Back out now, your sanity and pride is worth far more than this!

Please, don't go to that wedding!

'She made me pay £400 for my room'

I'll stop you right there. No she didn't make you. YOU chose to pay it, she did not put a gun to your head.

YOU are allowing all of this and can end it all in one sentence.

FUCK OFF SANDRA, I WON'T BE COMING TO YOUR WEDDING OR HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU EVER AGAIN.

Then block her on everything.

If she turns up at your door or accosts you in the street, call the police.

You do not have to honour anything.

Honestly, the things I read on here make me wonder sometimes!

On top of it all - the entire Hen Party treated you, the MOD, terribly too?

How did you let it get this bad?

I can't believe your friend wants to banish you from your own room. You could go along with it, but keep your key and get into bed beside the sleeping groom. This is sure to get the wedding day off to a brilliant start.

Can’t believe she wants you to sleep in the same sheets as her and her husband - Rancid

I would just copy and paste what you've written in here and say I don't expect to see you again
Goodbye and good luck

This can’t be real.
If it is and there is someone out there who is that cunty, then drop her like a hot brick. She doesn’t deserve you.

OP if this is real - you need to seriously reassess how you allow others to treat you,

Cancel everything. Including the cheque.

My first thought was more fool you. Stop being such a bloody doormat. Cancel the room, return the shoes if you can and after you've done that text her to say you won't be involved any further in her wedding or with her. Then block her everywhere. There is no friendship to 'honour'. I can't believe that this is real to be honest.

Bloody hell. You've been friends with this person for 25 years?? Get rid of this horrible person now

It's not a friendship, it's a dictatorship! She sounds batshit, let her feel the consequences of her entirely ridiculous demands and let her find some other poor sucker.

Hang on...isn't this the plot from 'him and her' where the sister gets married and is vile to her maid of honor? (Is always vile).