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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

No food

218 replies

cherrychapstickk · 01/12/2023 18:07

hello,

As the title says really.

My 2 and 3 year old have been taken out for the afternoon by their aunt and uncle.

They ended up having them for around 4 and a half hours, I expected around 2 but they said they got carried away.

Once they'd left 3 year old burst into tears saying she was hungry (they normally have dinner at around 5) and it turns out (i checked with auntie) they've not eaten with them at all.

Had I known they were going to be 4 hours I'd of packed some food but as I didn't know and they got carried away, am I unreasonable for thinking its quite harsh not to offer your young nieces any food?

I cannot imagine having any of their children, especially at such a young age, for that duration of time and covering dinner time and not offering anything to eat whatsoever.

OP posts:

VyeBrator · 02/12/2023 19:07

Ryeman · 02/12/2023 19:01

An afternoon out without some kind of food would be very unusual for us, even if we were without the kids! So yes I find it unusual that they didn’t have a snack.

Even if you'd eaten lunch at 12.30?

Wales1 · 02/12/2023 19:19

Outrageous behavior. I wouldn't let them go again.

Surroundedbyfools · 02/12/2023 19:35

I think it literally just doesn’t occur to some ppl to feed kids if they r not used to having them. Some kids r too shy to say anything. In that amount of time I’d have offered them something to eat and drink or asked if they were hungry. Altho if I was sending my two out with my brother I’d have packed snacks n told him to offer them as he is the type it wouldn’t occur to

housethatbuiltme · 02/12/2023 19:46

AtomicPumpkin · 02/12/2023 17:46

Maybe your relatives don't buy into the constant-snacking culture, which is actually very recent.

Not really I had 24/7 access to snacks as a kid of the 80s.

We also attracted hungry kids from all over who would beg for snacks, their parents may not have given them snacks but the kids WHERE hungry and looking for them.

riceuten · 02/12/2023 19:50

I suspect there’s more to this than we’re being told. It’s certainly not brilliant that someone went hungry, but it’s hardly a hanging offence

mantyzer · 02/12/2023 19:54

@housethatbuiltme you are supposed to be hungry before a meal. The idea that there is something wrong with being hungry is itself wrong.

Pluvia · 02/12/2023 20:00

but it’s hardly a hanging offence

Has someone suggested it was?

Original poster

cherrychapstickk · 02/12/2023 20:12

riceuten · 02/12/2023 19:50

I suspect there’s more to this than we’re being told. It’s certainly not brilliant that someone went hungry, but it’s hardly a hanging offence

pray tell! what do you think I'm concealing from you, I am intrigued!

I did update a while ago that they did actually buy a pie from the market that they forgot to dish up but it does seem a lot of people don't read updates. some of the responses are amusing though so I don't mind 😂

OP posts:

pollymere · 02/12/2023 21:35

I'd have expected them to have been taken somewhere for a drink and a snack to be honest. I went out that long today and my DH was desperate for a sit down and a drink! I think something about 3pm to 3.30pm is quite usual, especially for small children.

Ryeman · 02/12/2023 22:41

VyeBrator · 02/12/2023 19:07

Even if you'd eaten lunch at 12.30?

Show quote history

Well, yes. I’ve always been a snacker (fast metabolism I think) and we do love our food. We’re very active. I would find it hard to go from 12:30 to 5 without eating.

CelestiaNoctis · 03/12/2023 02:28

Yeah that's bad but once is just a mistake and I'd gently tell them about it and remind them tiny tummies need regular snacks. Poor little butter ball out of their routine, I know my babies hate that.

LimePi · 03/12/2023 09:19

@bellac11

no, not from my own head. That’s mealtimes in all nurseries and childminders. NHS guidelines also say three meals a day and two snacks (and they are evenly spaced out)

LimePi · 03/12/2023 09:32

@Penaeus

What nonsense
NHS guidelines state that young children like that should have three meals and two snacks a day. They are supposed to be at set times evenly spaced out so not “constant grazing”. Once kids are used to have lunch at 12 and snack at 3 of course they get hungry when a meal/snack is skipped. These are the meal schedules at nurseries and childminders now.

moreover in terms of obesity, it is BETTER to have smaller meals more often than 3 large meals. So five meals (three proper meals + 2 smaller snacks) roughly every 2.5-3 hours which is how kids at nurseries are fed is much more healthy.

of course meals and snacks should also be nutritious and healthy, not sugary.

toddlermam · 03/12/2023 10:44

Honestly, 1.45 - 5.45 I would have assumed they'd already had lunch. A snack would have been nice but it would have been up to you to ask them / pack something imo.

Skybluepinky · 03/12/2023 12:48

If they had been hungry they would have asked for food, u r over thinking it.

Original poster

cherrychapstickk · 03/12/2023 13:01

please atleast read my posts 🤦‍♀️

OP posts:

JoyeuxNarwhal · 03/12/2023 13:08

cherrychapstickk · 03/12/2023 13:01

please atleast read my posts 🤦‍♀️

Where would be the fun in that?! 😅

Abouttimemum · 03/12/2023 21:02

Well going against the grain a bit @cherrychapstickk I think it’s weird not to offer a snack across 4-5 hours. I would have eaten in that time and if I’d eaten I’d be offering a child in my care food.

Also for future reference I always put food in my son’s bag when he’s going places that he can ask for / help himself to.

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