Partner not come home freaking out and angry

[annabel586]

My partner went for Christmas party with work last night, he was going to drive but called me about 7 saying he was getting a cab home at 10. He tried calling me twice about 9.30 but I was in the shower so missed the calls.

Been calling him back ever since and he's not answering at all- rings through to voicemail. This is VERY unlike him as he always keeps in touch and calls me back etc

I know it's only been a couple of hours but I'm going out of my mind with worry now. I'm so angry but upset as well, I would never do this.

I put a slug of brandy in my morning coffee today. Does that mean I have a drinking problem

Possibly. It is a bit weird otherwise.

Comprehension problem? Have you been drinking?

I really really wish the sanctimonious twats criticising OP for having a BEER at 11.30am would take their pompous heads out of their arses.

Shame on you.

@ImNunTheWiser Mate, you didn’t have to announce your XY status, we would have been able to tell…..

😂😂😂

(I'm not disapproving of OP's beer btw. Absolutely fair enough! But brandy in morning coffee being vaunted as a touchstone for normality was a bit odd.)

Just loving the response that if OP ditches him who will miss out more...

I reckon I could cope without the sleepless nights of worry, the driving convictions, possible job loss, calls from police stations, driving the fecker everywhere if he loses his licence.

Seriously, there are good men and good sex toys, you don't get enhanced status with your Y chromosome if you're actually a total loser.

Yes. Because those with drinking problems like to go three weeks without having an alcoholic beverage. And then they get raging drunk on a shot of brandy. Classic behaviour.

What a horrible situation OP. I hope to god nobody was hurt. You deserve to de stress however you see fit. He deserves everything he gets. Hope you're ok.

Bloody hell op. I bet you’re furious. What an arsehole he is!

You've been deliberately selective in that quote, haven't you? To the point of being actively misleading or, indeed, deceitful.

If only, but sadly I have places to be that require me to drive and I quite like having a licence. I'm not a dangerous twat like the OP's partner either.

Sorry to hear this, OP. I can fully appreciate why you have been so worried and are now so angry.

Please do whatever it is you need to get some space, some rest and into a better mindset.

I admire you for sticking to your values.

Except it wasn't vaunted as a touchstone for normality, it was an example of drinking alcohol in the morning not being evidence of a drinking problem. Just like the reference to drinking mulled wine in the morning at a Christmas market.

@MeMySonAnd1

i had obviously posted before reading OP’s update on the drink driving. You might wanna think on a bit before telling people fuck you. Just a thought hun.

I'm done worrying about his whereabouts or how he's getting home when he has shown such little regard for everyone else.

Good for you.

Shame it wasn't his car keys he had forgotten instead of his house keys!

urgh all these posters trying to say that op having a beer means she has a drink problem…

GET A GRIP!!

as if that’s really the issue here.

man drink drives. Woman has one beer. Who gets the most vitriol?! The woman!

Pure MISOGYNY

What a prick.

Only you know if you could forgive this, OP.

He's lucky not to have killed someone.

Bloody hell what an absolute areshole. You are well rid.
To me drink drivers are down there with the lowest. Hope no one was injured or worse , there’s never an excuse to drive after drinking.

Hope you’re OK.

I'm so sorry

Get some rest and take time to process all this. You don't need to make any decisions just now

I can only imagine it’s a lot of self projection about own drinking habits that have brought out the judgers.

One drink at 11.30? Alcoholic!

Get raving drunk on champagne (or high on coke) after the kids have gone to bed? Fine!

OP, I hope you’re having a good sleep. Once the shock has work off you’ll be feeling bereft and will need support.

How absolutely awful. You poor woman.

Excellent idea to go and stay with your mum.

What a twat.

I hope you realise you deserve so much better than this.

I’m so sorry OP 😔

The most important question,, are you ok? You must be in emotional turmoil right now, Do you need help and support?

@annabel586

Good for you!!

It's really a shock, isn't it? We just don't expect that someone we love will ever choose to do something so stupid and dangerous!

When a very close friend of ours was arrested for DUI (thankfully, he didn't hit anyone) I told DH and our sons that I would happily pick them up anywhere, anytime if they were over the limit. But if they chose to drink and drive and get caught don't bother to call because I won't bail you and won't pick you up. And here if you don't get bail it's mandatory 48 hours in the clink. You do the crime, you do the time.

So I'm ok.

I'm still coming to terms with what this will mean for me going forward so still in a bit of shock.

But I am strangely content with the fact I know he is in a cell stewing on the gravity of the situation.

I am safe at my mum and dads and they are spoiling me, I'm going to stay here tonight.

Thank you all so much for getting me through the night. I will continue to update.

Not going to the Christmas market but we are getting a Chinese and wine later so there's that...