*trigger* was this a thing in the 90s?

[Buxton87]

I was only 20 (1996) when I had my first 'exam' at the doctors when I said I might be pregnant.

The doctor laid me on the table - said I was probably twenty weeks as per the last date of my period (my dad had died the same year - I was not in a great place). But the thing is, he told me to take off my top to examine my breasts. Was this a normal thing back then??

My partner at the time was waiting in reception. My son is amazing and we co-parented after only two years together, but everything has been good.

I had another child 15 years later and it was a totally different experience (NHS-wise!) It's been almost thirty years and I'm still upset about it.

I'm an intelligent person and I'm still so angry at the person I was then to not speak up.

So my AIBU:
AIBU - make a complaint
YABU - Forget about it, man!

I didn't vote even though you're not unreasonable. To complain? Now? I don't think so.

I was 15yo (early 2000s?) when a doctor not only asked me to take my top and bra off but also made inappropriate comments. Judging by his age then, he must be if not dead now, then definitely retired.

There's too much of a risk of dredging up unpleasant emotions but not gaining any closure (that you probably expect).
I'm sorry it happened to you. I would choose therapy in this instance over any "we are sorry you feel that way, we are sorry to be unable to corroborate your version of events".

Personally, I channel my energy into vehemently disagreeing with anyone who questions my right to choose a female doctor when I see it as appropriate. Someone's moral posturing matters less to me than my safety.

I would complain. You could be one among many. Not normal at all.

No that was not normal, no, I'm sorry 😞 Nothing like that happened when I was pregnant in the late 1990s. But I also agree with @QueenCamilla that it's unlikely that you're going to get anywhere with a complaint against the doctor after 27 years, unless the GP was <40 at the time, perhaps?

I too had a baby in 1996 as a teenager.
And was given a full body exam including breasts.
I can remember clearly feeling very uncomfortable at the time and wondering why.
I have 3 younger children born in the 00's and it never happened with them.

Much like you, I have considered making a complaint too but I'm pretty sure the doctor/consultant? is dead now.

2005 a dr did this to me. He just asked if I’d had an exam before and did one. Haven’t had a dr do one since.

Sadly, such abuses were pretty common back then, and earlier, based on anecdotal evidence from friends and family. I was 17 when I first had contacts fitted in the 60s, a very shy and inexperienced teenager. The optician who did all the examination rested his arm on my breasts as he leaned over me, breathing into my ear, getting a good feel in as he did so. I was far too embarrassed to say anything. It was horrible and I remember it well, almost 60 years later.

I had a baby in 1997 and no, I did not have any such examination, so not normal.

I was 19 and at university. Went to Uni doctor for sinus infection. He made me take my bra off. He lifted up my breasts with a pencil. I still find it bizarre. I just didn’t know what to do. He’ll be long dead though.

Breast exams were part of gyne exams, both female and male drs performed them.
examined for both breast ca and for breastfeeding purposes; things like inverted nipples would be recorded or fair skin tone.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1479568/
1988-1990
pretty much gold standard at the time

In 1991 as a virgin 17 year old - never even kissed a boy - I went to the GP for a throat infection and went on my own.

He asked me if I had ever had a breast exam and I said no, he told me to take my top and my bra off and basically in my view groped me for about 5-10 minutes. Didn’t look at my throat. Gave me antibiotics and sent me on my way. Didn’t even say why.

Over 30 years later I feel violated. This was the first person to do this - actually the doctor that delivered me 🤢and his name is up on a plaque in the GP centre newly built for him. There was no need for him to have done this.

Some appalling stories here. Makes me sick that there are people out there who thinks it’s acceptable to treat women like that.

The only thing I can think of of that pregnancy tests weren't very reliable then maybe and so doctors would look for specific signs. There was a time when you had to wait for three missed periods before pregnancy was confirmed.

I have a memory of the GP examining my breasts (late 1970s) and commenting on the visible veins being a positive sign. Was it necessary? I don't know. But the GP was probably around my father's age, had trained in a different world all those years before and I suspect doctors had no updating or continuing professional development in those days. They usually carried on practising as they always had done.

I had one as part of my initial obstetrician appointment so I think it was standard practice.

@Rocksonabeach oh my goodness, exactly the same thing happened to me in the 1980s! I went to my GP when I was about 18 because I had had recurring sore throats (looking back I think it was glandular fever). After being rather dismissive of the sore throat he said he needed to do a breast examination and then groped me for a few minutes. Part of me knew it wasn’t right but on my own with him I felt unable to assert myself.

It seems normal. Some doctors today are too hands off and are afraid to conduct breast exams and don't do thorough enough six week check ups after birth. Too many young women are not referred to physiotherapy or specialist checks in my opinion.

Back then mamograms were not done. Screening for disease, problems with breast feeding etc would be more hands on.
To be shown, by a doctor, how to do your monthly breast cancer check, was once a thing, and really important and I'm sure saved some lives.

aboit that time, my friend was in the GP when the dr randomly said ‘I should check your breasts’ and did the same thing. She was about 19. So so vile. YANBU.

I had my first baby late 90s. The doctor did do a breast exam, check for inverted nipples in case of breastfeeding issues, do a Pap smear and general health check. I don't think it was necessary now but it was part of their routine care then for pregnant women, so nothing untoward.

I think I must have been treated properly thank god. My first was born in 94. Female doctor confirmed pregnancy, all follow up was by female midwives. Any examination ever done by a male doctor of any intimate kind (think piles) had a female chaperone (usually the HCA). I do recall breast examinations both in pregnancy and at the family planning clinic in the years before. All female practitioners. Post pregnancy check up also a female doctor.

A bit embarrassing but no trauma. Seems like all
”womanly stuff” is pointed to the female doctors in our practice, and that’s ok with me.

Fair skin tone?

from one extreme to another. That is awful and I went to the Drs in 2005 on Birth control for a few years and a male Dr mentioned long term use increases such and such risks and. Said to do examination at home. No touching. They can show you on themselves.

Recently OH went to the Dr about fertility issues and the NHS guidance says a physical exam is needed for Verocile etc. And the Dr didn't even touch him. Just 5mins of questioning.

One extreme to another.

Dreadful stories on here. Not something I ever came across personally but I did tend to try and to see a female gp if I could but that wasn't always possible.

About 20 years ago a family member was asked to take her top off when she had a chest infection, fair enough, after listening with the stethoscope the (older locum) gp asked her to remove her bra. She refused. Another family member was sexually abused by her gp as a child. This would have been in the 1940s and she didn't say anything and still feels ashamed to this day.

Yes @CormoranEllacott particularly red headed skin tone, as it’s associated with more sensitive nipples and problems breastfeeding.

How in the fuck is it necessary to physically look at a woman's breasts to see if she has fair skin when you can look at her hair and other visible body parts? And even if a woman has sensitive nipples and is likely to have problems breastfeeding what can a GP do about that in advance of the birth that would necessitate looking at her breasts?
This logic is crazy.

I had very similar, around the same age in the late 80s. Had completely forgotten about it until this thread.