My next door neighbour shouts at his DD

[UndertheCedartree]

My NDNs have an 18 month old. The dad absolutely bellows at her and smacks her. This has been going on around a year. I also hear him playing with her and singing to her and making her laugh.

I find it really distressing. And I try not to judge but I can't understand what she could be doing that's so bad at such a young age and so frequently. I hear him shouting every day. As soon as it starts I'm on edge, listening and hoping he won't smack her. I don't know what I can do other than wear ear defenders all the time?

No, I didn't say that atall! You just assumed! I find it so strange that people think I would not have reported it.

I've reported it 5 times now.

I don't get why you didn't mention that you've reported it three times already.

What other advice were you expecting to get without including that information?? Links to the best ear defender reviews? Which you apparently already have and use...

Have you phoned the police when it is actually happening? They will take it seriously. I had to do it once, years ago and they turned up in 5 minutes.

Obviously I'm not privy to what children's services are doing with the family.

You just said a minute ago it was three times...

Reported. Not nice to attack me for being autistic.

In my head I think she is being smacked and then when I heard him threaten it the other day it sort of confirmed it. But the truth is I don't actually know if she is being smacked as I can't see.

And I've already answered about the mother.

You can not be serious

Record it the best you can and email in the recording to the local social services and contact the police with it.

I never said I could hear her being smacked. My title was that he shouts at her - i.e that was the most important point.

Three times or five?

You imagine the baby next door has been assaulted for a year, but you haven't heard it, or heard the dad threaten it, until just now? But you assume it's been going on.

What did you actually report three or five times?

I wish I could do this. But just thinking about it makes me feel like I'm going to faint.

If social services haven’t helped, then please do report to the police.

I just thought that is what anyone would do.

I just wondered how people cope when they have there own children to look after. I'm sorry I'm not very good at expressing myself. I have flashbacks and anxiety attacks when he shouts and I have my own children to look after.

I haven't. But I will if I can next time.

So you’ve reported to social services 3 or 5 times, you’re not sure. You said they haven’t done anything.

In your post you said you could hear him shouting and smacking her though the walls for a year. Now you’re not sure if he actually smacks her and it was only one occasion recently you thought this might have happened.

Ah, I see.

I didn't assume you'd reported. But now I understand you have.

I think then the issue is 'I've reported, but it's still happening, and I find it distressing/don't know how to live next door to it'.

I think you should report any actual threats of violence or episodes of hitting to the police when they happen.

Also phone the nspcc for general advice.

Sorry your thread has been a bit tough - it really wasn't clear you'd reported.

I said about 3 times. I found my notes and it was 4 times and then I phoned again, just now.

He's been smacking her since she's 6 months old? 🤔

What have you reported? Did you tell them something different to what you've posted on here? Because it keeps changing.

What did they say the fifth time you reported it? Any different than the previous four responses?

Thank you for keeping on reporting

It is horrible that things don't get fixed. But you're doing the right thing to keep calling.

What do you mean? I can't actually see or hear her being smacked so I can't say he is definitely doing this.