SIL uninvited DCs to party

[Cocoadoodle]

SIL is having a big birthday party tomorrow night. It’s family and friends and has been booked for ages at a local venue with bar, disco.
Family are coming from different parts of the country, with some staying at other local family members homes and some staying in hotels.
We have 2 DCs, so SILs niece and nephew. DD 10, DS 7
This morning she’s nonchalantly messaged me saying oh no, just found out after speaking to the venue that kids aren’t allowed. I asked her weeks ago and she said they were! My DC are so excited to celebrate their aunts birthday and see their cousins/other kids from extended family, and now they can’t go and she doesn’t seem to give two shits! They’re going to be gutted.
Cousin (in law) is driving over after school tonight to stay at ours with her kids for the weekend, and SIL hasn’t even bothered to tell them that their kids are now not invited.
I know I’m not being U, but what are we supposed to do? Or maybe I am being U as it’s her party so she can do as she pleases.

So glad that the kids got to have a nice party anyway - lovely of her mum to do that.

40 years old - Jesus wept. When will she grow up?

It was a family party. Not 'an adult party'.

Yes, i wondered if she was pressured to include kids in the first place.

I feel sorry for your MIL in all this. She’s obviously getting lots of flack from various relatives who were let down by SIL’s poor planning and blaming her for her adult daughter’s general incompetence.

But how can it be a 40th birthday party without providing some proper food? 😳

Yes, youngsters celebrating birthdays are often only interested in getting pissed but surely by 40, she should have moved beyond that? The only people I know that age that would do something similar are either alcoholics or drug addicts. 🤔 Addicts are naturally selfish people.

Wow all these people who are going to be "furious" "livid" "devastated"

Beggars belief....it's just a few hours out, mistakes are made, get over it and move on.

It was an excuse to get lots of presents and if the family believe that the chocolate fountain was 'double booked' then I have a bridge to sell! Sounds like it was just another example of her inability to organise a piss up in a pub.

I’d hold an alternative party at mine for all those who are unable to go because their kids are can’t attend, especially as a lot are travelling from other areas🙂

Gosh, if only @Cocoadoodle had thought of that, oh well too late now. 🤦

Better cancel the cheque as well Op.

Sarcasm doesn’t become you, sure it’s pretty obvious that I hadn’t read the pages and pages of posts😩
@Cocoadoodle great minds think alike 😉

Firstly, if a thread is three days old that is a clue that maybe things have moved on, especially as the Op's opening post refers to the party taking place "tomorrow" aka the 18th, so it seems just lazy not to have checked the Op's posts for updates. Secondly, you don't have to read pages and pages of posts, just click on "see all" on Op's opening post and then you can just read her updates without having to wade through the entire thread.

Cheers for the lecture, wow, just wow 😩

SIL sounds beyond annoying. I would have been livid too.

I know it isn't the main issue, but I'm always very suspicious of people who host this type of party, without food! Fairly basic requirement, IMHO.

By all means have DH have a word with her. Sounds like this particular message has been delivered many times over the last few days. Doesn't sound like she's bothered frankly, so don't hold your breath that it will have a different outcome with DH as the messenger, sadly.

how does this crazy woman still have so many friends? she must have form with people for this kind of thing and after a while it pisses people off and they don't bother, but you said 50 people turned up plus family ??

Well., if you’d rather not look a bit silly, @LardoBurrows has made some very sensible suggestions.

If you don’t care about looking a bit dim, you do you.

When you get the invite to SIL's 50th, you'll know to stay well away.

Whether or not your DH tells her what a selfish idiot she's been, life will be teaching her that lesson with damaged relationships and friends/family distancing themselves from her.

Well that last sentence really makes sense!! You need to proof read your posts 😂😂

I did. I’m sorry if as well as not reading the thread you’ve also not heard of the very common phrase ‘you do you’.

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/you-do-you#

Of course, after making an idiot out of themselves once, most people would at least google the meaning of a phrase before doing it again but as I said, you do you.

I haven’t 😂
More gobbledygook from CrabbiesGingerBeer 😩

Well that’s the first time I’ve heard a dictionary definition being called gobbledegook but you do you.

You really don’t let the facts get in the way of your arguments do you?

So far we’ve got:

1. Failing to read the thread and looking silly.
2. Being rude to people who make sensible suggestions and looking silly.
3. Failing to recognise a commonly used phrase used correctly, not checking anywhere and charging in to announce the person using it needs to proof read to look even sillier.
4. Claiming that a dictionary definition showing the phrase was used correctly is ‘gobbledegook’ and (and I didn’t think this was possible!) looking even more silly.

Please keep posting. My entire living room of people is currently howling with laughter and can’t wait for your next post! This is hilarious!

Some people really don't know how to be humble, or when to just stop Crabbies. I think it's probably that they're a bit embarrassed and don't know how to get out of it so throw a few insults around and hope they can embarrass the person who is trying to help them

I'd ignore Northernladdette as she clearly is just a bit dim.

What still bloody irks me about Mumsnet is people who don't read the thread and then post something really obvious with that sanctimonious little smile at the end. They then have the audacity to get upset that people point out they look an idiot! I thought we had all learn't something from cancel the cheque but seems not!

So glad I’m providing your otherwise boring evening with it’s entertainment 😊
Pretty sure if the OP had an issue with my advice she would have said.
Grow up 😳

😂

Please keep posting. My entire living room of people is currently howling with laughter and can’t wait for your next post! This is hilarious!

WTF?

MIL (SILs mum) told her she was selfish and that she’s had a lot of calls from pissed off family about the last minute change - SIL was apparently all “It’s not my fault!” and thinks her mum is overreacting

Maybe these family members and friends who had wasted money on unused hotel rooms and fancy dress outfits should send SIL the bills and ask her to repay them.

Unless she has to face the consequences then how will she learn

Why was her mother answering the phone and not handing it to her dd

She is 40 not 4

SIL organised the party so SIL needed to face the consequences