Hi everyone,
I'm sorry this reads long but there's too much backstory to leave out.
There was a flood in my bathroom this evening after a basin in the sink overflowed. I was distracted because I was trying to coax my child who was in the living room into having a shower and thought it would be quick. However it turned into a small temper tantrum and I temporarily forgot about the basin. Excess water ended up dripping into the downstairs neighbours flat- the man knocked and let me know, I asked is it bad? And his wife echoed from the bottom of the stairs 'It's very bad' in an aggressive voice. I had never met her before but have heard her voice in this similar tone plenty in the stairwell speaking to her husband. This is the THIRD time her husband has knocked on my door now. This time was obviously completely understandable and necessary.
However when I first moved in, he knocked on my door at 4am in the morning because my child was having a night terror and was crying and banging his foot against the bedframe. I was scared and taken aback that someone would knock on my door at those hours and realised instantly that I wasn't dealing with a reasonable person- At this point I hadn't even seen or met anyone in the building. He said 'Have you just moved in?' 'who have you got in there?'- really pushing boundaries with those types of questions as if he's the police. I told him I wasn't opening the door at that time and it could be discussed in the morning. I suffer from increasing anxiety/panic attacks and this really felt like a violation but I was also genuinely disappointed as I'd hoped to get to a good start with my new neighbours. So my partner offered to speak to him on my behalf as tbh I was a bit shaken up. He admitted to my partner that his wife had put him up to knocking on my door at that time as she hadn't gotten on with the previous person who lived here and she believed that THEY had been deliberately banging to bother them. This sounded ridiculous to us both. My partner had also seen her before and maintained that something wasn't quite right with her and we both agreed based on me also hearing her voice. They're a somewhat socially vulnerable seeming couple, the man is quite weedy and slightly dishevelled looking she is completely the opposite, confrontational, loud and aggressive and seems to have clear issues.
The second time he knocked on my door I was doing a short aerobics routine- no jumping as I'm aware someone lives downstairs- and he came knocking again, I explained what I was doing and that I'd be doing this each morning, I politely told him that I appreciate my personal space and it's an upstairs flat so there will be noise from time to time- basically signs of someone living above him. I asked him his name as he started walking away and he didn't even bother to answer.
So tonight, the one time where I feel he was perfectly justified in knocking, I got my shoes and socks on and went downstairs just to apologise for the leaking water and see what, if any damage was done and how they would be moving forward if there's lasting damage etc. just basic decorum. We discussed the leak, which had stopped as soon as I mopped up the water and there was no damage despite her mentioning 'you can already see the rust'- obviously I paid attention in school so I know rust wouldn't and couldn't magically appeared straight after the fact- I thought thought that odd but ignored it.
So I'm speaking to him and his wife at the door. The conversation starts off cordial enough until his wife starts making complaints about other noises in my flat- mechanical sounding noises, rather aggressively like she wanted a confrontation. She mentioned that she had rights regarding noises. I told her that I know my rights as well and that as it's an upstairs flat there will be certain household noises. I had a noisy fridge a while ago and that got fixed. I explained that it could be either that or the vacuum cleaner- after going round the houses over this for a while and me reiterating that it must have been the fridge but that that was fixed, she turned to me and said 'I think you're gaslighting me'. She swore that she could still hear the noises. She mentioned that she had been recording them! I asked to hear the recordings but her husband couldn't find them in his phone. She and her husband said they would knock AGAIN once they heard the noise again so we could identify what it was. She also said that she believes the noise suddenly switches off when they enter the building- insinuating that I'm somehow playing games. She then said that she was going to buy a microphone to record the noise. Things started to feel surreal and blatantly antagonistic then and I knew I needed to end the interaction. I told her that that sounds like surveillance to me. As I was genuinely perplexed about what this noise could be, I ended the conversation by saying to her husband come up if you hear the noise as I don't know what it is. Before anyone suggests this was inappropriate, it is him who she has been sending up doing the bidding the whole time and she was clearly spoiling for a fight by then, plus he'd said he would. The whole thing is ridiculous but I wanted to get to the bottom of her 'noise' claim and then basically tell them to back off.
As soon as I got upstairs I went about my routine telling my child that they were going to have a shower- that's when I realised what the sound she was talking about was- I have a giant boiler next to the shower and switches for the hot water and the water pressure pump. When the water pressure pump is also in use, when having a shower it does make a low pitched, basal groaning type of sound- however that is simply the plumbing of the place and it's not like I'm lavishing in the shower for hours on end in a cost of living crisis. Either way, it's literally the sound of the cogs turning in the place and doesn't last for more than under ten minutes at a time, most times.
Based on this woman's attitude and energy towards me, which seemed pented up, it would seem she has been moaning about everyday usage sounds at my flat- not jumping, not shouting, not loud music, arguing or anti-social behaviour- yet she has a problem with the sound of a motor/pump coming from the shower during sociable hours? Surely it didn't just start making this specific noise when I moved in?
Both seem like utterly unpleasant, entitled irrational people. From their behaviours they seem to both have issues going on. The man seems beleaguered but equally unpleasant. I'm trying to not let this affect me but I literally haven't done my aerobics since and trust me, I really need the exercise. Now I know it's the shower, what am I going to do? Stop washing my hair? I also feel like I'm tiptoeing around the flat, yet still knowing that it doesn't matter and that they'd find ANYTHING to complain about. AIBU to think this couple are completely unhinged? What is to be done about this type of behaviour?