Waking boyfriend up on holiday ,aibu?

[ifitfeelslikeparadise]

We have saved all year for this holiday and got here yesterday.
Just to the Canary Islands but spent £3,000 for a nice suite.
The night before we came away we stayed in a nice hotel and he went to sleep at 7pm
Got up the next morning at 7am
We got here yesterday afternoon
We went to bed last night at 8pm and probably asleep for 10pm
I woke up this morning at 6am but couldn't get back to sleep as 8 hours was more than enough.
7am I got a drink from the beside cabinet and woke him up.
Apologised and after 5 mins I got up and went into living room to make a cup of tea.
He comes in moaning waking me up at 7am on holiday making tea
Anyway turned into a argument
Because I don't want to spend all holiday In bed.
He's so lazy
Honestly 8 -10 hours should be enough
Maybe I'm a little excited but I've planned this for ages now
I'm sat on balcony making no noise while he is still in bed.
He's told me I can't unpack my case till he gets up
Aibu to not want to spend all holiday in bed?
He says it's his holiday too -which it is
But surely me getting up and going in next room isn't really bad ?
I crept out

Sorry OP but you knew what he'd be doing on holiday when you booked it. Why you think he'll turn into another man just cos he's in the Canaries is beyond me. Why do you live with this man??

I'm a lounger and a snoozer on holiday and I'd be fucked off at being woken at 7, but I'd have been out until midnight-2am the night before! Going to dinner at 6:30pm, bed at 8pm and watching MasterChef like an 80 year old when you've spent 3k to be there sounds dire.

Also don't see why he can't just go back to sleep, why does he have a problem with OP sitting on the balcony with a brew? Baffled by all the people defending him, if you're a light enough sleeper that someone making a cup of tea in a different room down a corridor from you is enough to prevent you sleeping then you need earplugs! Completely unfair to expect your partner to just silently sit in bed wide awake until you're done sleeping.

I'd call this fundamental incompatibility OP. Either that or he's ill because the amount of sleep he's having seems ridiculous for a young-ish man.

Actually we do. They were watching masterchef!

Why are you with this bore? 7am is fine to get up and go and make a cup of tea. You were even in a separate room with the kettle ffs. I'd definitely do that.

After that I would cease being particularly quiet and would do what I wished (within reason). Absolutely nobody would tell me that I couldn't unpack my suitcase before he deemed it a suitable time to wake up. I'd just go and do it and if he complained he'd be told to button it.

By your descriptions it seems that when he isn't at work he just wants to lie in bed all day as you talk about weekends when he doesn't emerge until Monday morning.

He's a bone idle arsehole. While I do like lazy days on holiday he is pushing it too far. Sleeping in for hours and hours and then just getting up to get pissed isn't much of a holiday. I certainly wouldn't be going with him again.

Don't creep around the little prince now. Get your case unpacked (not particularly quietly), then go out and start to enjoy your day. Leave him behind.

Yes they are going to bed silly early, that is true.

I agree he sounds like a dick in general. And I wouldn’t want to spend the whole holiday in bed like he does.

It sounds kind or weird to spend £3K and fly to another country just to sleep. Maybe the money could have been better spent getting a new mattress at home...

It's his holiday as well. Just leave him a note telling him which club you'll be in.

How bloody dull is he!!! Your not compatible -

Yabu

I’m sorry but it’s really stretching all points to say 7 am isn’t early. Of course 7 am is early

It isn't if you were in bed by 10.
I have reached an age where when I wake up I want to get up. I'm often awake by 7 even if I don't need to get up.

It's really stretching it to say that 7 am is ridiculously early.

As an aside DH needs to eat early for health reasons. He can't keep Spanish hours.

This relationship won't be your forever one. Neither of you are in the wrong just very different. If no kids involved I would just enjoy the holiday independently if he wants to join in fair does.

Staying in bed having hot holiday sex is one thing, watching masterchef and instructing you not to make tea quite another!

what a way to live. I’d just get up and go out by yourself for the morning, maybe a swim, a stroll, leisurely breakfast

The lazy days in holiday wouldn’t bother me too much but I would absolutely get up and make tea, as quietly as possible.

however, I could not be with someone who wasted their life in bed all weekend. How you’ve done that for 4 years is beyond me.

Last night we spent the night watching master chef

That would annoy me way more than any amount of sleep. It's good to get extra sleep on holiday, as I don't do this at home. But Master Chef you can watch at home.

Your first post is a bit ambiguous, OP. 7am I got a drink from the beside cabinet and woke him up could be deliberately waking him up, which sounds very unreasonable to me. Whereas accidentally waking him up doing something normal is just par for the course when you're with someone. So from your first post I'd say you sound unreasonable. But the more you post about him, the more like a lazy arse he sounds. I couldn't be doing with it.

3k to watch masterchef of an evening and sleep half the day. Sounds thrilling.

If everything else is absolutely great in the relationship then maybe you can work out something that suits you both.However, I have a feeling this isn't the case. Use this time alone to take stock of your relationship and decide if it's what you really want for the rest of your life. Those weekends would drive me insane and I wouldn't contemplate having kids with this man, he won't change. Enjoy the rest of your holiday and don't let him dictate everything.

@ifitfeelslikeparadise - what do you do on the weekend? If he comes home on Friday after work and goes to bed until Monday morning, do you bring him food/drink/etc? How on earth do you put up with that?

Does he shower/wash during the weekend - or do you share a manky bed with a dirty slob who refuses to get up?

When does he get up? For family (his, yours) functions/gatherings? Restaurants? Football?

Do not have children with this person. It is not normal, and if he has you catering to him as he lounges and lazes in bed for days on end - run, now!

Do what you want on holiday He's the weird one wanting to sleep all day. How on earth anyone can come home on Friday and spend the weekend in bed then get up for work Monday is beyond me. If he thinks this is normal and you will join in he's a right knob.
I'd get up and dressed and head out every day without him, and make your plans to get rid of him as soon as you arrive back home. This isn't normal, he isn't normal you deserve to be with someone who matches you better, and isn't horrible to you just because you went into the other room to make a cup of tea.

I don't think you can have a fulfilling and happy life with this man.

In the meantime make sure your clothes and swimsuit are out and ready for each day so you can pop down for breakfast, a walk and to lounge by the pool while he sleeps.

It's perfectly acceptable to quietly go into another room to make a drink whatever the time. From your other posts OP I am surprised you went on holiday with him at all or didn't expect to be doing many things by yourself. It must be very boring going on holiday/spending weekends with your DP

Your one of those god awful early birds aren't you?

Bed at 7pm awake at 7pm is no way to live.

Life happens at night, honestly what worth being up for at 7am?

You're on holiday, almost all entertainment happens at night.

I'm not even one of these wild people that sleeps all day and parties all night. Average life is bed at 11.30 awake at 7.30 with the kids but on weekends/holiday taking it in turns with the kids it maybe chilling watch a film etc... until midnight/1am then sleep to 11am for a lie in.

I get not being able to sleep, happens to me sometime especially if I'm in an unfamiliar place but I have never woken the others or been mad they want to sleep.

Can’t help wondering this myself - what’s great about your partner OP that you booked another holiday with him?

That makes me feel really sad for you, don’t lower your expectations of your holiday because of your partner

That sounds so incredibly depressing. How can you live like that?

Compromise. Talk about it and make a plan for each to make the best of the holiday!

Sounds like you have different holiday expectations and need to adjust your plans accordingly and chat about a compromise. I am a sleeper in til midday (pre kids!) on holiday, and I once went away with a ‘riser at 6am on hols to not waste the day’. The deal we struck was she would get up, go for a walk and breakfast and I would meet her ready and dressed not later than 9.30 so we could enjoy the day together. Obviously if we had an earlier morning activity I would have got up for that. It worked well - but the best holidays I have had are with friends who like a similar daily rhythm to me - up late, one low key tourist activity most days, lazy dinner and drinks and late-ish nights with a glass of wine and a long chat. Maybe this bf is not the one!