Waking boyfriend up on holiday ,aibu?

[ifitfeelslikeparadise]

We have saved all year for this holiday and got here yesterday.
Just to the Canary Islands but spent £3,000 for a nice suite.
The night before we came away we stayed in a nice hotel and he went to sleep at 7pm
Got up the next morning at 7am
We got here yesterday afternoon
We went to bed last night at 8pm and probably asleep for 10pm
I woke up this morning at 6am but couldn't get back to sleep as 8 hours was more than enough.
7am I got a drink from the beside cabinet and woke him up.
Apologised and after 5 mins I got up and went into living room to make a cup of tea.
He comes in moaning waking me up at 7am on holiday making tea
Anyway turned into a argument
Because I don't want to spend all holiday In bed.
He's so lazy
Honestly 8 -10 hours should be enough
Maybe I'm a little excited but I've planned this for ages now
I'm sat on balcony making no noise while he is still in bed.
He's told me I can't unpack my case till he gets up
Aibu to not want to spend all holiday in bed?
He says it's his holiday too -which it is
But surely me getting up and going in next room isn't really bad ?
I crept out

You're assuming he sleeps the entire way through from the moment his head hits the pillow at 10pm to the minute it turns 7am 😂perhaps he is a bad sleeper in which case 7am is unreasonable. I can wake in the middle of night for no reason whatsoever for 1-2 hours! But I tend to have an overactive mind...I gather my many many thoughts then eventually go back to sleep for round 2.

I hate being woken up - it’s bad enough when kids do it but if I was childless on holiday I’d also be livid. Stay up later and do what normal people do on holiday so you also want to sleep in!

You are both on holiday, so need find a way to both get what you want from the holiday. If he wants to pay his share of £3000 and sleep the day away - then let him.
Meanwhile you do what you want, be it sat on the balcony or by the pool enjoying the sun and reading a book while sipping a frappe or cocktail. There's plenty enough hours in the day for you two to do things together.

DH and I are different in that DH will happily snooze in bed in the morning whereas I could do the same loafing on a sunbed a little later on!! Meals are flexible - earlier one evening maybe nine-ish another night - you are on holiday and you go with the flow. But................... even though there is invariably a TV in the room - it rarely goes on!! We'd rather go for a walk or explore or drop into a bar for the entertainment.

One of my favourite times on holidays is to grab a book and go read on a sun lounger while my family sleep in - I then go back and wake them up for a late breakfast. Just pack bits the night before and leave the room when you wake - make most of the sun!

If this was the extent of my holiday, I'd be inclined to get up and do your own thing. Pop back at lunchtime and see if he is up if not leave him to it. By the sounds of things he's no different at home. Don't waste your holiday OP, enjoy yourself x

Uh... everyone holidays in different ways. To me your way of holidaying sounds 'abnormal'.

It's day 1. It it were to carry on going to bed at 8pm and then sleeping late next morning I would be annoyed. 8pm is really early to go to bed on hols!

I don't think he sounds the man for you tbh, doesn't sound like he is very enthusiastic about ever doing anything.

Forget the holiday, what's this about never leaving the house on a weekend ?? He never does errands or goes to the pub ? How do you spend your weekends ?

As usual the real issues become clear in the OP's updates which many posters don't read.

I don't know how you can live like that, OP, unless there's something medically wrong with him, and that wouldn't explain his getting up just to spend the afternoon drunk.

He's a complete disaster.

I thought this too 😆

There's new born babies getting less sleep than this bore. Yes people have different sleeping patterns but if someone has a pattern which is very outside the norm - as his is - then the onus is largely on him to compromise. The OP already slept for 9 hours which I would consider a LOT, it is ridiculous for him to expect her to sleep/lie still for any longer than that.

dinner and then tv and an early night… is he in his 60s? Does he have medical issues as to why he can’t/won’t do anything during weekends?

@ifitfeelslikeparadise how fucking bored will you be of this life/routine in another 20/30 years?

christ. I’d be making plans for a life lived without him. Have experiences, excitement and do things other than sleeping, getting pissed and watching tv!

7am is a silly time to get up on holiday and its hardly "spending the whole holiday in bed" to not get up with the sun. What do you think you are missing at 7am? Nothing is open and no-one else will be up! Is it normal for you to go to bed at 8pm? If so, I'd say that you are both wasting a holiday by going to bed before the shops are even shut, let alone any evening entertainment, dinner etc. If it was a one off, of course he doesn't want to get up at 7am and end up being on the go for 16 hrs+.

7am is a silly time to get up on holiday

Not if you have had nine hours sleep. I just can't sleep for that long. After nine hours I am all sleeped out (if there is such a term).

DH is a very early riser. Once he awakes he can't get back to sleep, but he slides of of bed quietly and goes downstairs and leaves me to finish sleeping. In the OP's shoes I would be doing the same, and probably going down to breakfast without him.

He sounds the controlling type who always manage to spoil special occasions like birthdays, Christmas, anniversaries & holidays but somehow make it all your fault.

Does he control you in other ways OP?

This and it's day one!

I caught the sleeper train with an ex once from Georgia to Armenia.. not that we got much sleep cos they have to wake you up to check your passports at the border. Anyway we arrived about 7am and I suggested having a nap on a bench at a quiet part of the station for a 2-3 hours. My Ex looked at me like I had two heads but went along with it just sort of pacing quietly around me.. anyway I couldn't relax cos I knew he wanted get going and it was distracting so I decided to just get up and go. Nothing was fecking open at 7.30am as you can imagine, it was cold (although it could have been worse for February), and to top it off I found out later that the shops tend to open at 10am in Yerevan as opposed to 9am in the UK. FFS!! 😡I was pissed, but did my best to not let it show.

That holiday would give OP's boyfriend the shock of his life 😂

😂it would. I mean it gave me the shock of my life tbf! But I look back it now and smile.

My husband can sleep for FAR long than I am able to. I just cannot go back to sleep once awake. Generally when we are on holiday I will get up, throw some clothes on and go either out to sit in peace on our balcony or head down to the poolside and sit and have a coffee there. I love being awake and watching the resort spring to life but I don't expect him to do the same. That said, if I have ever woken him he has never mentioned it.

Why is he sleeping so much? The only time I've felt the need to sleep 10+ hours as an adult is when I'm ill with flu or Covid. Assuming he's not ill there must be heavy drinking or other substances involved. I suspect that's why the OP is annoyed as I'm sure she knows that 7am is kind of early for a holiday.

I know plenty of people who get and need 10 hours sleep we’re all different I don’t see it as unusual I wouldn’t jump to substance abuse that hell of a leap

What a waste of youth.
An utterly depressing way for someone to exist if medically not avoidable.

Dump the deadweight and find someone to enrich your life and enjoy holidays with.

A future with him will be joyless, and he'd be a shit father who only makes life harder if you're interested in raising a family.

@Guesswho88 - if this is the case he might find he sleeps better if he went to bed a bit later! Probably sleeping too much 😅