To ask how to handle this teacher situation?

[OutOfMyDepth86]

Before I start this is not a teacher bashing thread, on the whole I think they do an amazing job.

My ds14 in year 10 is having a really hard time with one of his teachers, to the point on days he has this teacher he is not wanting to go to school. He has got upset several times and states the teacher singles him out repeatedly. I have emailed school three times and had no response, rang and spoke to the year 10 student coordinator twice, was promised a phone call, email response and got nothing, my ds him has been and ask to move class of a few occasions. He doesn’t get in trouble or have detentions for any other subject.

The issues are as follows:-
We are out of catchment area by 15 miles, first homework was take 35-50 photos of where you live in away it represents community and the place. He did this, I know he did this as I bloody walked around for 90 minutes in the rain helping him and as always I get him to bcc me into homework emails. She told him he hadn’t done the homework properly and just taken random photos of pretty fields and trees as he lives in x place, he informed he didn’t and this is the area he lived. He received 30 minute detention for not doing the homework correctly.

Had to redo the homework same criteria, which he did redo and got told off again. He told her the criteria was where you live not X place and that’s what he did. Got a 30 minute detention for rudeness but she accepted the homework.

She singled him out and wouldn’t allow him to leave the classroom with a camera to complete the coursework made him sit at his desk for all 3 lessons that week. Then gave him a 30 minute detention for not completing the coursework, this has happened three times since September.

According to ds and backed up by a few classmates she screamed in his face in the classroom in front of the class over not completing the coursework, that she didn’t allow him to take part in.

She shouted at him and gave him a 30 minute detention for not looking at her when she was talking to him. He was looking at her to the best of his ability, he has a squint which has been surgically corrected twice and now he has grown is waiting a third operation, his eye involuntarily wonders/crosses, he can’t control this. School are aware as hospital have written to them about seating arrangements best for board work.

There has been several other incidents but these are the worse of them, I can’t allow him to be bullied by this teacher. She is the adult in a position of authority and I don’t think she should be allowed to abuse that power. What do I do as the school are ignoring all my attempts of communication of this issue.

I would say that pictures of fields etc does represent a rural community.

But even if they didn't... the proportionate reaction from the teacher would be to say something like:

"These are good pictures, and maybe they do capture the area where you live, but I'm not sure you've quite managed to represent the community as well as the landscape - if you live in a rural area, maybe you could have included something like some pictures of the local pub or something happening at the village hall? So next time, just think more clearly about the brief you've been given."

That's how teaching works. You give feedback and explain what the student can learn from the mistakes they made the first time.

But what the teacher did wasn't proportionate or constructive. She simply told him that he hadn't done the homework because they weren't photos of where he actually lived, and gave him a detention. When he explained that they were of where he lives, she refused to believe him.

OP, I definitely do think this teacher is singling out your son. She's basically bullying him. Also, regardless of his eye condition, a detention for 'not looking at her' would be insane anyway - again, totally disproportionate.

I had a teacher at secondary school who singled me out in a very similar way, and all my classmates noticed and regularly commented on it. And I had a geography teacher who really bullied one particular girl in my class (she made her stand in the corner holding up a sign saying 'I am stupid' or something on it because she accidentally dropped a pencil once). Most teachers are great but you do get the occasional wrong'un.

Weirdly enough DD had a similar teacher for GCSE photography years ago. She shouted at DD for missing class to attend her grandmothers funeral (I had told the school and DD had completed the work in advance anyway).

I would go into the school if they’re just ignoring phone calls/emails. It’s completely unacceptable.

Is he in year 10? I’d honestly look if he can swap options. Photography is much more weighted towards coursework I.E. teacher assessed, which could really count against him.

I will go into school and ask to speak to the head of year tomorrow morning, my ds came home upset again today. He was given two further 30 minute detentions today, the first one because once again he was not allowed to join in the practical and join the class on the 1 hour walk around taking photos, so he asked her why.
The second one was because she then screamed at him for being a rude obnoxious little boy and he said he did snap back and tell her not to shout in his face, I will make him apologise for snapping at her but I don’t fell what he said was wrong.

Just to make it clear, she has not allowed him to join in any of the practical lessons and then gone on to punish him for being the only one not to complete the work. This is bullying as she is not allowing him to join in then setting a punishment which is abuse of power. This is class work I am talking about not homework all homework has been completed in full and on time.

Following that update I would be absolutely fuming with her, and the school, and I wouldn't expect him to apologise for telling her not to yell in his face. Respect needs to be earned, and she clearly has no respect for your son so doesn't deserve any in response. Are the detentions during break times or after school? I wouldn't expect him to attend them if after school.

If it is exactly how your DS has told you, then that's absolutely awful behaviour by the teacher and definitely needs to be dealt with robustly by the school.

However, it might be worth asking your DS to talk it through with you one last time to make sure you have all the facts as he understands them. I'd also ask him to be absolutely honest with you as to why he thinks the teacher is refusing him joining in the class work that's taking place outside of the classroom. In my experience this can happen if a student's behaviour isn't acceptable and they can't be relied upon to behave outside of class/school. Let him know you'd rather he was honest now than for you to go in and find that he's not told you everything - kids don't always tend to tell the unvarnished truth to their parents for many different reasons. I trust you usually have a reasonably open relationship with him so you know if he's being truthful or avoiding telling you.

Does he have a planner with any notes written down about the community photo HWK? Any notes from the teacher about it that you are able to check? Anything online on the parent portal if they use one at your DS's school? To my mind, community is the people and their connection within the space they live in so photos of surroundings would not be enough so their homework would be graded accordingly.

No child should ever be shouted at in their face. But teachers can get frustrated and raise their voices in class generally if, for example, they have given the instructions for what is needed and pupils have ignored the instruction because they were talking or mucking about and didn't listen, and then said they didn't know.

Oh my!! That's shameful!!

My child put in an official complaint about a teacher that shouted at them. She did it out of frustration but it was unacceptable. The teacher was made to apologise to my child in front of the head of school and it was noted on the teachers record.

Remember your child may make mistakes snapping back (as they have had numerous occasions of being spoken to in an unacceptable way.) The teacher is paid to do a job at a certain level. You need to have a e mail trail and log an official complaint. If the school do not satisfy your concerns you can then escalate further. You have had some good advice.

The teacher should be nurturing and supporting your son. They make mistakes as they are human but it sounds like they have had a lot of chances. However things may be happening you are not aware of so a meeting with the teacher could also be a good idea?

Not sleep very well at all last night as my ds was so upset yesterday and is adamant he will not be returning to this teachers class.

DH and I have spoken to him at length and so has his big sister and I do believe him and that he feels singled out, I can see that the situation is making him very anxious and he is not an anxious child. I know children don’t always recall things accurately and that he may have done things to irritate the teacher but something has definitely gone on for him to be so upset, I know my child better than school and the anxiety he is displaying is very unlike him. He has never had behavioural problems at school and is doing very well in all his other lessons.

I know from my previous attempts at a conversation with the year 10 co-ordinator the school take the attitude the teacher is 100% right and the student is 100% in the wrong. I need to firmly but politely verbalise that I don’t agree with that approach and that my childs version might be completely different to the teachers version but that doesn’t mean he is lying. It is very clear there is an issue and the issue is affecting him so needs resolving, I think I am going to ask for him to be moved groups whatever the outcome.

I would send no more texts and e-mails.
It needs urgency.
Go in person armed with all details and completed homework.
Be professional and polite and reasonable at all times. Make no threats but do fully explain the situation.

Insist on a meeting with the Head who should hear you and arrange a meeting with the Head of your son's year level.
Assistance will only come from the top.

The teacher needs to make things right and her behaviour needs to be exposed.
Hopfully it will be resolved to the satisfaction of your son.

About thim snapping back. Is there any studious girl in the class who would help clarify what happened there? Not one of your son's mates but someone more impartial.
Do you think you need to hear (and the head of year needs to hear) another version of the incident?

Usually the other class mates know what has been going on so it should not be just the teacher's say so - particularly when she could be a bully. Does your son have form for snapping back?

write an over view to the head and copy in the chair of governors, the form tutor and head of year. Point out all the phone calls and emails that have resulted in no response despite promises to get back to you. Request the complaints procedure and state that you’ll be putting in an official complain if the issue isn’t resolved to your satisfaction this week.

Raise a formal complaint.

Send it to the Head.

And also start looking at alternative schools as this can't continue forever.

I quite agree. The teacher is a bully. I thought those days were over, I remember public humiliations from my school days.

Do go to the school, op, and make some demands. If they are not met, find him another school. Being classified as 'outstanding' is not everything which is evident from what you say.

The second one was because she then screamed at him for being a rude obnoxious little boy and he said he did snap back and tell her not to shout in his face, I will make him apologise for snapping at her but I don’t fell what he said was wrong. I would not make my child apologise for anything at this time.

What you are describing sounds extremely unusual.

You need a formal complaint marked urgent to go to the school.

You must follow the school complaints procedure. Write a formal letter in line with this policy and entitle it 'formal complaint level x' in line with the policy. This will set the formal system in motion. Keep it factual and where you are dealing with emotional aspects from your son you can write phrases like 'DS's perception is'. Obviously coursework is an entitlement so any prevention of him doing that risks school outcomes as well as your son's. The behaviour from the teacher is aggressive and unprofessional. What they should have done is eliminated any errors in understanding of the task by supporting him. Since this is a subject complaint rather than pastoral it will likely go to the head of department so check on the website who this is. If the teacher is themselves the head of department then it may need to go to deputy head curriculum. Include the part about your commitment as a parent re trudging about in the rain too. Likely that the head of dept knows there is an issue with this member of staff and yours is not the first letter.

In addition to meeting the HoY, send in today copies of any medical reports about your son's eye condition and ;ask that they be sent directly to this teacher with a reminder that punishing him for not looking at her is discrimination on the grounds of disability.

This teacher is a bully. Definitely need to make a fuss.

Gosh, this sounds absolutely horrific. I would be going straight to the head now the I would follow up in writing and include the governers. I would also be filling in the parent feedback on the Ofsted site ( which I believe you can at any time) this is not an outstanding school! Hopefully the head might take notice of threat of re-inspection and deal with this horrible women!

I hope your son is ok today, must he so awful for him to deal with

What does his older sister say about this teacher

I know from my previous attempts at a conversation with the year 10 co-ordinator the school take the attitude the teacher is 100% right and the student is 100% in the wrong

you don’t sound like you think much of this school
your son appears to be having a very tough time
plus the school is 15 miles away and presumably means he spends a lot of time travelling

perhaps you need to look at an alternative?

That sounds awful. Normally I would counsel getting the school/teacher's side of the story before overreacting but if you can't get hold of anyone then there is no way to do that!

I would go into school and insist on speaking to someone. Something is definitely not right .

OP, I am really upset for your son. In our school if a child is facing issues in just one lesson, that would be flagged as a concern and dealt with. I really hope you are listened to.

I thought I'd reply as a parent of a year 10 boy. My son is a shit, this I'm aware of and admit (he does also have sen, which does add to the mix) but no matter what my son done I would not allow some teacher to raise their voice to him and single him out. I would speak to the school calmly and ask for a meeting with the teacher. I would also get a old phone or something and tell me son to put it in his pocket and record everything. Your also hear what he's like. Tell him not to tell anyone else as I'm not sure this us allowed. You then have the proof you need of the shouting. If no improvement I would go straight to the head, skip all the others, head of year, head of house, and I would ask for a meeting with the governors. I'd also inform the school that your be letting ofsted any any other organisation know that the teacher is unfit to teach your son. Also go to the senco and ask for your son to be observed due to his eye condition to make sure he's coping, theirs no actual need for this but they have to do it and your see how he's doing in other lessons. Even if your son is being a shit, he doesn't deserve this and she's not handling it in the correct way.

What reason has your son been given for not being allowed to do the practicals?

Is is possible that the teacher has asked them to photograph their area because there's a specific theme the area round the school meets eg an urban area?

If it was clear from the first batch of photos that rural shots didnt meet the bill, why didn't he just take some photos of the area around school the second time? Doing yet more rural photos when its been made clear that's not what's wanted feels like sticking 2 fingers up to make a point.