Did guests bring you precooked meals when you had a newborn?

[Redcargidan]

Not an AIBU but a question. We have a newborn baby. Multiple people have asked me if our friends/family/visitors have brought things like precooked meals in tupperware (that can just be put in the microwave) when they visit, that sort of thing.
Nobody has done this and nobody did when our eldest was a newborn. In truth, nothing would be more appreciated right now than a meal I did not have to cook. Is this a thing? Do other people generally do this, or are the people that have said it just expectant?

I am fighting the urge to spend a fortune on takeaways because we are way too tired to cook, and am VERY jealous if other people generally receive precooked meals from visitors!
YABU - this isn't really a done thing
YANBU - this is a thing

The temptation to ask people to bring these instead of clothes that will only fit baby for 1 week when they come round! (Joking but wish I had the balls to do this )

Nobody brought us any meals round but my Mum did come to stay with us for about 2 weeks after each of my three babies were born.

She did all of the cooking and a fair bit of housework and laundry. DH took his fortnight of paternity leave (all that was allowed by his employer back then) and took over most of it then.

We did also go for a couple of pub/restaurant meals, the first being as a means of thanking my mother for her help.

After DH went back to work I was pretty well ready to get going again, even after DD3 who was born by c-section.

I have just looked up COOK - the new parents box is two weeks of meals for £160, I would have loved this when DS was born! Tempted to have another baby just to make use of it

My lovely mum brought casseroles and pies. 😀The church we belong to offers a fortnight of meals if one of the congregation has a baby and the rest of the congregation sign up for an evening on the rota if they are able to.

Nothing from in-laws who sat down and expected endless cups of tea.

You should have shown them the door

Some friends sent us Cook meals. We have done the same for others since. Excellent.

Yes, my closest friend (who has a baby three months before me) drove 2 hrs to visit me with her lovely mum and both of them had cooked a meal. Her mum also did some cleaning whilst we were feeding our babies. The kindness brings tears to my eyes even now our babies are adults! I didn’t really need the meals but it felt like an act of love to me and that was very much appreciated.

The best gift I got was a friend who arrived and did all my ironing.

My mother brought food. And second baby my MIL came and stayed for 3 weeks and cooked and cleaned throughout.

Yes a thing for me. I didn’t usually have to cook till around 3/4 weeks after birth for my children.

Guests not so much but in our church, nobody cooked for a fortnight after giving birth as hot meals were delivered each night. We also did similar where a family member was in hospital or whatever the need was. We took turns to cook for the family , worked beautifully and so appreciated.,

We didnt but it didn't cross my mind that it was a thing. I'd prefer to sort our own food out.

I prepared food beforehand and either me or my husband made food depending who was happiest doing it.

I don't really understand how you would need help cooking food if there are two of you. If it's a single Mum then I can but not if there are two of you.

There are so many easy nutritious quick meals you can make.

I never expected visitors to do chores either. They might have had to make their own tea and lunch sometimes and make some for me but I wouldn't have wanted people to be doing chores.

If you have other things at play such as illness or something then fair enough but generally I think if there are two of you you should work chores and food out yourself.

Did they fuck.

My brother's then girlfriend was around demanding to be fed the night I got out of the hospital, though. I was still in a wheelchair.

No. Seems odd.

My husband did all the cooking. Life doesn’t stand still just because you have a baby.

My lovely MIL prepared 2 meals for us, which were popped into the freezer. As I had an EMCS, I was really grateful for those when I got home.

My mum did this when we first came home with our ds. Only a couple of casseroles but it was great.

Yep. And I did for friends. Usually a massive chilli to be eaten over multiple nights and easy to make. And a box of biscuits. And cake.

I think it depends on whether you did it for others, cos usually these things are reciprocated AFAIK

No! I'm way too independent and was very happy for them to visit, see baby for a fuss, then leave. DH made most of the meals and I prefer that than plates of Aunty Jane's mince stew.

I'll accept chocolates though 😁

Nope, not us. I'd actually find the pressure of someone doing something like that for me, too much. To remember to reciprocate, coo over how delicious it all is, return the tupperware etc. I also wouldn't want to do it for anyone (what if they don't like my cooking?) and would think it presumptuous if I bought someone a takeaway (as though they couldn't afford it themselves!). I'd rather buy the baby a toy, visit for 30 mins and a quick cuddle, and otherwise stay in contact by text (which person can reply to whenever they like, or not at all).

I actually rather enjoyed make-do meals when my DC were newborns. Omelettes, fresh filled pasta with jarred sauce, takeaways with enough ordered for leftovers another time, sandwiches, cereals etc. It doesn't last long, the newborn phase.

Sadly not. I had to make teas, coffees and chat when all I could think about was bf, pain and wanting to rest and eat.
Put a stop to visitors with baby number 2.

I spent a fortune on M&S ready meals and takeaway pizza with both DC's.

I live in Germany and there’s an organization called Supermamas where mums from the neighborhood sign up to bring meals to new parents. I had people cook for me when I had my kids and I’ve done it for others. I made one really close long-term friend through it too.

Friends of ours did but they have their own restaurant. Our lovely cleaner brought us some too. My partner cooked as well so I don’t think I cooked anything for about 6 weeks.

No-one did it for me, but if my kids ever have kids I think I’d send some cooked meals. With my 3rd and last baby I spent the 3wks of Mat leave before baby arrived cooking for the freezer. Best thing I did. Lasagna, bolognaise, curries etc

One person bought us some kind of posh frozen meal - a lasagna or something - might have been a Cook one. Generally my then husband cooked tho - that one always did the cooking anyway.

I did go and stay in my mom's house for days at a time when my daughter was a tiny baby, and my mom did all the cooking (and everything else) for me then. That was great. (My mom is a hero). I like to think that if my daughter ever has a baby I will offer the same.

I have never thought to cook food for people who have had babies, tho I would have no objection to doing so. I tend to give money or supermarket vouchers if it's a close friend (on the basis that it's actually the most useful thing to give most people, but you have to know someone well for them not to feel patronised, IYSWIM) , so I guess they could spend it on food if they want?

Yes, a few friends did, and I've done the same for them. Some also brought over all the ingredients for a cold buffet lunch when they visited in the week when DP was at work, as well as making all the cups of tea etc. Did also get some ready meals from DSis which was nice of her but we don't really eat ready meals so they did sit in the freezer for a while

many of them are 'expected' to stay in bed for 40 days

Which would be completely against medical advice.