Did guests bring you precooked meals when you had a newborn?

[Redcargidan]

Not an AIBU but a question. We have a newborn baby. Multiple people have asked me if our friends/family/visitors have brought things like precooked meals in tupperware (that can just be put in the microwave) when they visit, that sort of thing.
Nobody has done this and nobody did when our eldest was a newborn. In truth, nothing would be more appreciated right now than a meal I did not have to cook. Is this a thing? Do other people generally do this, or are the people that have said it just expectant?

I am fighting the urge to spend a fortune on takeaways because we are way too tired to cook, and am VERY jealous if other people generally receive precooked meals from visitors!
YABU - this isn't really a done thing
YANBU - this is a thing

The temptation to ask people to bring these instead of clothes that will only fit baby for 1 week when they come round! (Joking but wish I had the balls to do this )

DM did this for us 15 years ago and again for Dsis when she gave birth x 3. Dsis and I had both done a little batch cooking whilst in very early labour 😂 and semi- filled the freezer so we had something quick and easy for the first couple of weeks. But it was lovely to have some of DMs home cooking when too tired to cook!
Otherwise we've given other close relatives COOK vouchers so they can choose meals that they like to stock the fridge/freezer.

Only once and although it was mostly precooked it needed rice (also supplied but needing cooking). Different rice from what I usually use - boiled over multiple times, stuck to the pan, made an absolute mess of our cooker and the pan sat soaking for days. So actually I was quite grateful in the end that we weren't 'helped' like that too often. It was really kind and we appreciated the thought, but doing what we know quickly is often easier!

Why can't DH cook? You just brought life into the world. You are the reasons his genetics continue into the next generation. You literally bore his legacy for the future. Make him cook you dinner.

Why does everyone always assume men do nothing? He does cook but he works 55 hour weeks and is also tired.

No. Never heard of it in real life, only in American films.

Supermarket microwave meals are the norm when you can't cook for yourself. Some are actually quite pleasant.

Yes thank god. We were very lucky. Both mums & SIL bought us meals. Fresh or to be frozen. Really appreciated it.
can you not ask immediate family for some help? X

My best friend bought us a cook box and it was brilliant. Another friend sent brownies. They kept me going through the night feeds. Food was definitely the best in terms of all the gifts we received. Would have been nice if other visitors thought to do the same, but didn't happen.

I don’t think people are assuming he does nothing, just that it’s really the basics to take charge of making sure your wife is fed when she’s just had a baby! Even more so if you’re breastfeeding.

My parents and in-laws did this - they brought home cooked meals every time they visited, including for themselves so we didn’t have to cook for them.
Some friends also brought home cooked food for us.

Congratulations on your new baby!

I recommend Cook as well.

If you'd rather not have visitors, I'd tell them to postpone their visits if I were you. I was too nice when dc1 was born, because my MIL was quite insistent on visiting and I only managed to haggle for postponing to two weeks. This time I'm going to insist on at least three.

There's a group where I live called Meals for Mums. I had 6 precooked meals from 6 different people over a fortnight when I had my DCs. Some people I knew, others I didn't. When my kids were a bit older I then returned the favour for anyone who needed or, it was an absolute godsend.

No because we weren't suddenly incompetent. We showered, got dressed and ate healthy meals just as we always did. We had batch cooked beforehand (we do that anyway) and took turns to make dinner (while the other fed the baby/sorted washing/did whatever. We weren't precious at all.

That’s so lovely!!!

No. I did a lot of batch cooking and freezing before my second DC was born which worked out well but with my eldest we were unprepared so DH went shopping and bought food that could go from freezer to oven.

A couple of our friends did, and another has said she wants to this time round. Noticeably all mums with young children of their own, so perhaps they are more aware of how helpful it is!

Yes, my lovely friend brought round a lasagne. And her own baby was 6 weeks old. Miss her a lot (we moved away ). Did make me think about how I would be sure to do the same for others, but that also you’re not completely incapable of doing things once you’ve had a baby. She was mega though.

I didn't say he did nothing, you said you didn't want a meal you had cooked. That suggests he doesn't cook. So can he not cook on his days off and do some batch cooking so you can chuck stuff in the oven without much thought.

Some women are left quite incapacitated after c sections. That doesn't make us "suddenly incompetent"

You sound a bit smug. Maybe your baby was quite easy to look after when newborn compared with some.

No, no one brought me home cooked meals.

Instead, my MIL and Sister in Law and her child came to stay for a week, and expected to be waited on hand and foot!

No, but I had six weeks of laying in at my parents while my mum cooked wholesome and nutritious meals.

Yes, our church had a system where you get meals delivered for the first 10 days - was brilliant! The rota is organised by the last family to have a baby, so everyone benefits. Great system x

Same here!

No because we weren't suddenly incompetent.

Is your trophy on the mantlepiece or in a cupboard? So rude. There are so many reasons a family might need support, that doesn't make them incompetent.

Not tupperware as such, but my mum stayed with us for a few days and cooked. My brother also came down for the night and cooked, cleaned and helped with my eldest. Love my family! That's only because they stayed after travelling a long way though. Local family didn't do anything like this.

We lived off freezer food and takeaways for a couple of weeks once my mum went home. If it took longer than 20 minutes and minimal effort it wasn't happening!

Agree it's a much better present.

Out of curiosity, have you made a habit of providing cooked meals to other people when they have had babies?