Did guests bring you precooked meals when you had a newborn?

[Redcargidan]

Not an AIBU but a question. We have a newborn baby. Multiple people have asked me if our friends/family/visitors have brought things like precooked meals in tupperware (that can just be put in the microwave) when they visit, that sort of thing.
Nobody has done this and nobody did when our eldest was a newborn. In truth, nothing would be more appreciated right now than a meal I did not have to cook. Is this a thing? Do other people generally do this, or are the people that have said it just expectant?

I am fighting the urge to spend a fortune on takeaways because we are way too tired to cook, and am VERY jealous if other people generally receive precooked meals from visitors!
YABU - this isn't really a done thing
YANBU - this is a thing

The temptation to ask people to bring these instead of clothes that will only fit baby for 1 week when they come round! (Joking but wish I had the balls to do this )

Yessss, @AcrossthePond55 - I recognise all this

Bloody right answer! A couple of times it was done for me BUT the caveat was that they ate with us at a time convenient for them and left us with the washing up - so couple came over and baked roast Sunday lunch. Got annoyed when the Midwife turned up just as food was being served and had to wait. My FIL had the audacity to quietly sing "Why are we waiting".

I must say it's impossible in the western culture to do these kind of favours to new moms as the attitude is always about "they have to sort their own lives, my comfort is more important or it's not my business". I am Indian (we live in UK) and when I had my two babies I was helped with precooked meals by two family friends who are so close to us. Our whole family is back in India. It's just me and my husband here. Not that I received help, I also helped my neighbour recently who had her third baby. I gave her two dinners for family of four, Husband, wife and two young kids. She was very thankful and she cried how stressful it is life with newborn and how much she appreciates my help. I definitely learnt a lot in the west loving in UK for the past ten years. Life is comfortable and everyone do their own business and don't bother others. People here are polite and friendly. But I would say people have less emotional connection with family and Friends. Everyone expects too much and less gratitude. I believe it's because it's a developed country.

I was the first to have a baby in our NCT group and when I got home from the hospital our closet friends from NCT came around with a full banquet of food in Tupperware and the husband of this couple heated it up, cooked some things fresh and served it for us. I can’t tell you how touched I was and how much it was appreciated!

There are some cultures where women cook for other women because the men aren't expected to cook, do the supermarket shop, or any childcare.

Interestingly, all the people I know who cook for parents of newborns are all women.

We had one friend bring us a spag Bol with our first. Nothing with our second. I didn’t expect anything. It would have been nice but I understand how busy life is!
We survived on ready meals, and super easy meals (ie stir fry with pre cooked meat, sausages and ready made mash, chips and oven food)

No-one did it for me but I heard of people doing it for my new friends from ante-natal classes and thought it must have been such a blessing.

When my (now adult) daughter's lovely sister-in-law was having her first I suggested to my daughter that she did exactly this.

She made up three chicken and vegetable pies topped with mash - one for this week and two for the freezer - so all she had to do was heat up some frozen peas and they had a nutritious meal. Also easy to eat one-handed with a fork if you're breast-feeding.

The sister-in- law was so touched. I think it's such a kindness.

I think it's something that happens in those rare families or communities where people actually support one another.
When I had a newborn I was more likely to get shouted at for being incompetent if I asked for any help at all.

I’ve had 6 kids and no one has done this for me 😅

Best advice I ever got before my first born arrived was "Fill your freezer" so pitching up with a precooked meal for the exhausted parents is a great idea

Yes our church does this. A quick WhatsApp group gets set up when baby arrives and in about fifteen minutes there are 7/10 days of meals sorted. They get dropped off, quick pop in for 5/10 minutes and that’s it. No pressure on tired parents to entertain and the family feels remembered and loved.
It’s not usual I don’t think, but it’s a lovely thing to do and to receive

nobody did for me but there’s no shame in ordering some ready meals to be delivered

or pizza. Or pasta with a jar of pesto

No, they brought me and my baby the flu.

Wish they had given us meals!

Yanbu, when my sister in law gave birth I filled her fridge with the pre made Cook meals as I didn't have the time myself to make them but she really did appreciate coming home to them! Especially after a rubbish labour.

No one did for me. I had newborn twins and would've killed for help. People just brought flowers and being honest, and slightly ungrateful, I just thought "bloody great. Another job to do, find a vase, unwrap them, empty the bin". I didn't want flowers. I wanted a hug and someone to make me a cup of tea. 😬

In most Jewish communities someone will organise a week of meals after someone has a baby (at least... could be for longer if the baby is in NICU or whatever). Might be organised by a community or might just be friends - when I was in hospital with preeclampsia my friend organised other friends to visit me every single day, with an epic peak when 4 guests came bringing an entire 3-course Shabbat dinner for all of us on a Friday night. That time we did get in a bit of trouble with the nurses for being too sociable in the ward dining area... Also it's usual to turn up with food when visiting families suffering a bereavement. I guess it's a cultural thing.

No. But I would have loved and appreciated it
For my 2nd, I batch cooked loads of meals and froze them so I didn't have to cook with a tiny newborn

My best friend bought food and cooked it while she was at our house visiting my daughter. My sister in law rocked up with pizzas that my husband cooked (I think, someone cooked them and it wasn’t me!). I usually take snacks and some sort of meal, be that a ready meal, ingredients to cook, or will order a takeaway delivery as soon as I arrive.
Newborn life is HARD and new mums are usually hungry and desperate to eat with both hands instead of one!

A few people did this - a massive lasagne that fed us for days, a shepherd’s, pie a daal and 2 people filled our freezer with Cook frozen meals. A few people turned up with brownies (and found their own way to the kettle)! Not forgetting the lovely people who sent me a cheese box to compensate for 9 months without stinky cheese! 😂

I remember every person who gave us food and I have no clue who gave us millions of baby grows! 😂

Yes absolutely we had people bring food round. What else are you supposed to do?! I now live in the US and a meal train is super common, friends and family sign up for a couple months after baby is born to just drop off food. We even had it at DC’s preschool for families with new babies… also very common after bereavement. At least among my friends/family, the drop off is also not necessarily associated with a visit

Nope and I've had 2 children. That would have been amazing! Honestly I don't think many people do actually cook. Most people are busy working long hours, grabbing take out/putting processed food in the oven! I imagine certain cultures gifting home made food, where the women stay home and cook.

No one did this for us but I paid someone to come round for 3-4 hours a day 4 times a week for the first two weeks and they helped with DS a bit and did a bit of laundry / tidying as well as preparing dinner so that we had a home cooked that night plus a prepared one for the next day. DH will.did a food plan and Tesco order but used meals that we had recipes for so she just followed those

We also had takeaway a couple of times a week. So I didn't cook at all in the first two weeks except for breakfast and sandwiches for lunch etc and neither did DH. The after that DH did most of the cooking for the following few months It was absolutely the best money I spent on anything aimed at making life with a.newborn easier . Both DH and I were quite shell shocked the first two weeks so having homemade meals we liked to eat every night was great

Nope, never had this happen to me. It feels a bit like those US shows where people bring food round to new neighbours; very familiar seeming but not actually a ‘thing’…

It’s not something we got but look for more cost effective and healthier options rather than takeaways if you have them locally

We order freezer meals from Wasted Kitchen locally and they are amazing!

Www.wastedkitchen.co.Uk

I recognise this from sitting shiva, but never had it with a baby…