AIBU to not drive partner to work while on maternity leave during bus strike?

[AmIclutchingpearls]

My partner can't drive and so can't get to work during the current bus strikes.

He usually works 1 day a week at home and 4 in the office. He works in finance and can do his job entirely remotely. Unfortunately his employer (large company) are insisting he goes in at least 3 days - the reasons given are that his contract doesn't allow full homeworking and apparently one colleague has asked why he should get 'special treatment'.

We live in a rural location so no transport option other than me driving him there then picking him up (total 4 hours driving per day, 12 hours per week). I am on maternity leave so could theoretically do it but I really don't want to if it can be avoided!

Partner's uncle and sister both live close to his work so I have suggested he could ask if he could stay with one of them 2 nights a week (or 1 night each) meaning I would only have to drive him there Tuesday morning and pick him up Thursday after work. He is close to them and they regularly stay over at our house at weekends but he won't even ask them!

AIBU to say he asks his family to put him up 1 or 2 nights a week temporarily or finds his own alternative?

Also, any other advice around dealing with his employer or other options more than welcome!

Thank you all!

No I wouldn't do this op. You've offered a solution but if he doesn't want to do that then it's his problem to solve.

His company say people should go to the office at least 3 days. Why is he doing 4 when 3 is acceptable?

There's no way I'd be driving 4hrs a day with a new baby. It would either wreck nap times or be stressful trying to keep them entertained in the back.

She's got a new baby and another child fgs!

That’s not his relatives’ problem though, is it? It’s clear he doesn’t want to ask them because he knows it would put them under pressure to say yes when he knows full well that nobody wants a houseguest staying with them for months (or indefinitely.)

Is his office near a tube or train station

Or can he can he get a train /tube then taxi to office

Or cycle

I’m amazed that he travels over 2 hours each way 4 days a week! It must cost him a fortune in fares!

Oops, just realised he only travels 1 hour each way!

He can take annual leave for a week.

They're indefinite in length and every day. The only services running are contract services (eg scholars services) manned by agency drivers hired before the strikes were announced.

How would that help? That covers one week of the strikes. What about the rest?

If it takes you 2 hours to drive him there, does it not take him nearer 3 hours on the bus? Is there really no train station or other bus route within that 3 hours?

This is how she put it in her OP... is it 2 hours each way or 1?

It is one hour there one hour back by car. If the OP does lifts it will be two hours in the morning and two in the evening as she has to return home.

The bus normally takes 1.5hrs eachway.

i take my husband in on a strike day but-its only one or two days at a time at most and i dont have dc

its just not feasible and he has to speak to his eomplyers again if its remote and exteme circumstances they should make an exception

I feel for you. I know a few people who are affected by that bus strike. Perhaps asking relatives if he can stay would be a good idea. Hopefully the bus strike will end soon. But that in itself had been totally unreasonable. Hope you get it sorted.

imo you really can’t expect a small baby to spend 5 hours in a car every day indefinitely.

How old is the baby? It won't be safe for a baby to travel that long in a car seat.

Instead of the bus couldn't you drive him to/from the nearest train station. There must be one within about 10miles.

He's a prat for not learning to drive as a teenager but you're both stupid for him not learning when you got pregnant or were even trying for a baby as you wasted at least 9 months when there were 2 salaries coming in.

As for now, get driving. You're at least half the problem.

The baby shouldn't even be in the car seat for long periods, it's bad for their breathing. I'd say no more lifts. If he can do his job remotely then they should allow it.

I bet his employer was happy for him to work from home during covid though wern’t they. And no doubt ok for him to work from home if he is sick with covid. Annoys me that employers can be so inflexible, it’s a bus strike and is out of his control.
I wouldn’t expect my partner to spend 4 hours in a car with a baby driving me to and from work, he should either tell his employer no and speak to his HR department or stay at his relatives.
just curious how long does he take for him to get to and from work on a bus if it’s 4 hours in a car. Wow.

Isnt his work anywhere near a station ?

He needs to learn to drive obv. My DP doesn't and it means ferrying the kids around, moving furniture etc has always fallen to me.
Since he can't do that in the time frame, stay with family as you suggest or BnB.

Why must there be? Vast parts of the country have no feasible train options. I haven't had a job within easy acces of a train station for about 15 years

Not everyone lives and works near cities you know and even if there was how does he get the last 10 miles without the bus?

Costs me £55 in a taxi one way and takes about 45 mins to get to a train station

Why on earth "must" there be one within 10 miles?

Unless you are a time traveller from pre Beeching era? In which case I would have had a train station a mile away