To be put off by date eating pub leftovers

[Runki]

I have never posted on here before so please be gentle! 😉 I just wanted some honest opinions from people. I've been seeing a man for a number of months. We went out yesterday to a pub for something to eat, at lunchtime. When we got there, the table next to us hadn't been cleared yet and there was quite a bit of food left on plates. I asked him what he wanted to eat for lunch, and he said he would just eat some leftover toast and sausages from the uncleared table. I thought he was joking and laughed. But he actually meant it. He took two pieces of left over, cold toast and some sausages and proceeded to eat them, with no plate. I said I would buy him lunch and he didn't need to eat leftovers! He said he couldn't stand wasted food. I ordered my own lunch and ate it, alone, as he had already gobbled up the leftovers from the people who had left. Would this put you off someone? Or should I more be accommodating?! In all honesty, it made me feel very uncomfortable and I found it very unattractive. How would this make you feel, can I ask? Look forward to hearing what people think. For context, he has never done this before, but has alluded to wanting to do it when we've been to other places. I asked him yesterday if he was worried that someone's saliva might be on the leftover food, but he said he couldn't care less.

Not bad. Just wierd. cos firstly, I don’t know how you wouldn’t have noticed an extra dessert being placed in front of you and secondly, any mistakes with orders are usually flagged up with the waiting staff ASAP by one of the party at table. I find it really odd that you just passed the unordered dessert to another diner.

So bad!

Best reply ever 😂😂

@BrightYellowDaffodil Your reply made me laugh so much. Thank you. I clammed up like a startled oyster and have remained clammed shut, ha ha ha!!! 😂

@itsgoingtobeabumpyride I agree! Absolutely brilliant!

It's usually happened when there's lots of people all eating together and chatting so not noticed. I haven't just handed food over I explain situation and ask if anyone would like it.

I hate wasting food but would draw the line there - I could not eat of an unknown plate , which had been left there since who knows when!

Is it an eco thing? This has made me laugh but yes, pretty grim in hygienic terms.

My FIL is an alcoholic and on his 60th birthday, all the family went out for a birthday dinner. After everyone left the pub, I saw him drink everyone's partially finished drinks

@SwordToFlamethrower why on earth has everyone left partially finished drinks?

😧🤢😲 the faces I made reading that OP, dear god he's vile, the food could have been lifted off the floor, slavered on, yuch

That is brilliant.

I thought the date I was on was bad enough when he stole my tip for the waiter. Yours is on another level!

Like many people, going into a pub at lunchtime I've sometimes seen loads of food left on people's plates and thought 'what a waste', before thinking 'perhaps the food wasn't actually that nice/the portion was too big for the customer's appetite/the diner dropped some of it on the floor/their kid sneezed on it'.

So while I agree it's a shame to waste food, my third and fourth reasons would certainly stop me from snaffling leftovers from unknown people's plates.

I also agree it was pretty thoughtless of your date not to actually share a meal with you, OP.

Incidentally, like a pp, I used to know someone who, when last orders were called in a pub, would go round topping up his pint with the leftover dregs of other people's beer. But he was only an acquaintance, not someone I was in a relationship with!

I think you might be better off without this one, OP. Best of luck to you.

I’d have went further . I’d have left the pub on the spot and made it known why.
Yes yuck , yes tight but even more so is he thinks it’s acceptable to leave you to eat alone .
This man is awful he will be all
sorts of trouble if you stay . He’s starting to show you the real him. I wouldn’t be looking forward to learning anymore tbh

Sorry to say but his lack of hygiene must permeate to other areas…
he probably doesn’t wipe after excreting and probably thinks soap is overrated.

This would be a deal breaker for me. 🤮

I was in a cafe yesterday with DH and our dog, waiting for a takeaway coffee.
Our dog was whining and staring at a left over sausage on an uncleared table. My DH reached over and gave it to him. I was disgusted and embarrassed and that was him just giving it to the dog.
I would have LTB had he eaten it himself!

I can't deny I have looked at left overs on other tables and wished I could snaffled them because they looked lovely or I was hungry, but common decency stopped me!!

DTB, quickly!!

Has AI entered the chat? It's such a strange story.

I like the challenge of using leftovers at home for lunch recipes and not throwing food away , but not half eaten ones and certainly never anyone else's in a restaurant. 🤮

Omg. I have a couple of friends who used to do this but in service stations on the way back from shenanigans when they were skint due to spending all their money getting off their tits. Believe it or not they're perfectly respectable people now! Even they wouldn't have done it on a date - standards, sweetie.

Someone I'd met as friends did this when he came to a works doo with me......except he grabbed a waiter walking past carrying plates he'd cleared from another table, to salvage some left overs. I don't know who was more gobsmacked.....me, my colleagues, or the waiter.

Look on the bright side: He was clueless/comfortable enough to do this without shame on a first date so you didn't waste too much time on him.

Has he no pride in himself?

This is totally disrespectful to you too!

I wouldn't even be able to look him in the eye again as it would repulse me.

And I know some adults who were brought up in poverty with no food. They ended up in the care system. They wouldn't dream of doing this!

You know what the gross part is? It isn't eating food that strangers have touched. The gross part is that he is a grown adult and there is ZERO chance that he doesn't know it's socially unacceptable, and he still both did it AND ignored your cues that you didn't want him to do so while you were out together.

Tell him honestly how offensive and unattractive you found it.

In your place I'd probably give a second chance, but not a third. For reference: I also HATE food waste and am also incredibly, incredibly skint, but a stranger's plate in a public place is way beyond my limits - if he had no money he shouldn't have agreed to "go out to eat" and if he wanted to be a food waste champion he should have collected freebies from the Olio app and made you something yummy at home.

Look on the bright side: He was clueless/comfortable enough to do this without shame on a first date so you didn't waste too much time on him.

It's not quite the first. But certainly better now than too involved down the line.

I've been seeing a man for a number of months.