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AIBU?

To be put off by date eating pub leftovers

574 replies

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:31

I have never posted on here before so please be gentle! 😉 I just wanted some honest opinions from people. I've been seeing a man for a number of months. We went out yesterday to a pub for something to eat, at lunchtime. When we got there, the table next to us hadn't been cleared yet and there was quite a bit of food left on plates. I asked him what he wanted to eat for lunch, and he said he would just eat some leftover toast and sausages from the uncleared table. I thought he was joking and laughed. But he actually meant it. He took two pieces of left over, cold toast and some sausages and proceeded to eat them, with no plate. I said I would buy him lunch and he didn't need to eat leftovers! He said he couldn't stand wasted food. I ordered my own lunch and ate it, alone, as he had already gobbled up the leftovers from the people who had left. Would this put you off someone? Or should I more be accommodating?! In all honesty, it made me feel very uncomfortable and I found it very unattractive. How would this make you feel, can I ask? Look forward to hearing what people think. For context, he has never done this before, but has alluded to wanting to do it when we've been to other places. I asked him yesterday if he was worried that someone's saliva might be on the leftover food, but he said he couldn't care less.

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

3720 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
2%
You are NOT being unreasonable
98%
SpicedAppleAndFreshCider · 06/11/2023 21:37

How has there been votes for YABU?

Who are these disgusting people?

Dinglewoop · 06/11/2023 21:37

Oof that is bad. I'd find that really hard to deal with. Yanbu

FannyFifer · 06/11/2023 21:38

I would have left if I was out for a meal with someone & they did that.
Bloody disgusting.

TheCadoganArms · 06/11/2023 21:38

Does he pick dried chewing gum off the underside of public transport seats and much on it?

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:39

No, it has never happened until yesterday. But he has said once before that he would be willing to and wanted to eat the leftover food from the next table another time we went out. I thought he was joking when he said it and then a staff member happened to come and clear the table and deprived him of the opportunity to eat it, looking back!

OP posts:
SM4713 · 06/11/2023 21:39

Are you a journalist by any chance OP?

SpicedAppleAndFreshCider · 06/11/2023 21:39

Was he pissed?

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:39

Ha ha, probably!!!

OP posts:
HolidayHollie · 06/11/2023 21:40

I wouldn't like this either but it makes me wonder ha she ever been really poor or homeless.

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:40

Not on the slightest! This actually happened. I work in an office in a lowly admin job!

OP posts:
BennyBlancofromtheBronx · 06/11/2023 21:40

SpicedAppleAndFreshCider · 06/11/2023 21:37

How has there been votes for YABU?

Who are these disgusting people?

I voted YABU because how is this even a question? OP is actually asking if she should accept this nitty behaviour.

Motherofalittledragon · 06/11/2023 21:40

That's foul, I'd be dumping that one.

Fiery30 · 06/11/2023 21:41

That is quite odd behaviour. He seems to have impulse control issues, in that he is not rationally thinking through the consequences of his actions. I think an honest conversation is due here. Why does he think its ok to eat off someone's leftovers? Has he experienced starvation or poverty growing up and therefore, cannot see any food go to waste? If he were really concerned, wud he consider giving the food to a homeless person? Or is there another underlying issue? Obviously if he is not willing to be honest, then you can reconsider your relationship.

Cnidarian · 06/11/2023 21:41

Oh gross! The rankness aside, a meal out is about the two of you sharing food and an experience together which he completely ruined. Not recognising that and making you eat alone is insult to injury.

WhateverMate · 06/11/2023 21:41

SpicedAppleAndFreshCider · 06/11/2023 21:37

How has there been votes for YABU?

Who are these disgusting people?

People who think there's more chance of a rocking horse having a shit, than this being even remotely true maybe?

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:41

No, not pissed. :-)

OP posts:
AvonCallingBarksdale · 06/11/2023 21:41

Absolutely revolting and I would be questioning his personal hygiene - I hope you’ve not shared bodily fluids with this specimen 🤢.
who the blazers are the 5% saying YABU??

haribosmarties · 06/11/2023 21:42

I kinda sympathise with him because of hate leftovers.. I hate waste. When you see barely touched plates of food that are just going to be thrown away...
However I've never actually done this. On a hygiene level it's a bit dubious.
I think it's reasonable to be a bit put off by it. If he is a lovely guy and this is the only issue I might overlook it...

MarryingMrDarcy · 06/11/2023 21:44

No, no, no, no, no, no, NO

Mamadothehump · 06/11/2023 21:44

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 06/11/2023 21:35

I honestly thought this was going to be about him hoovering up your leftovers, but oh my god, thats really gross!

Same!!

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:44

It actually happened! I have never started a thread on Mumsnet before and only did so to see what people thought. It surprised the life out of me so I wanted to know if anyone had ever experienced this before.

OP posts:
Snugglemonkey · 06/11/2023 21:44

There is no way back from that.

fishfingersandtoes · 06/11/2023 21:45

The pertinent question is why can't he bare seeing food go to waste?
Past experiences of poverty?
Ecological reasons?
Fwiw I don't find it all that gross but it is a pretty unusual thing to do.

SpicedAppleAndFreshCider · 06/11/2023 21:46

WhateverMate · 06/11/2023 21:41

People who think there's more chance of a rocking horse having a shit, than this being even remotely true maybe?

I'm not usually so gullible.

Honeypickle · 06/11/2023 21:46

Utterly revolting. Next!

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