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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be put off by date eating pub leftovers

574 replies

Runki · 06/11/2023 21:31

I have never posted on here before so please be gentle! 😉 I just wanted some honest opinions from people. I've been seeing a man for a number of months. We went out yesterday to a pub for something to eat, at lunchtime. When we got there, the table next to us hadn't been cleared yet and there was quite a bit of food left on plates. I asked him what he wanted to eat for lunch, and he said he would just eat some leftover toast and sausages from the uncleared table. I thought he was joking and laughed. But he actually meant it. He took two pieces of left over, cold toast and some sausages and proceeded to eat them, with no plate. I said I would buy him lunch and he didn't need to eat leftovers! He said he couldn't stand wasted food. I ordered my own lunch and ate it, alone, as he had already gobbled up the leftovers from the people who had left. Would this put you off someone? Or should I more be accommodating?! In all honesty, it made me feel very uncomfortable and I found it very unattractive. How would this make you feel, can I ask? Look forward to hearing what people think. For context, he has never done this before, but has alluded to wanting to do it when we've been to other places. I asked him yesterday if he was worried that someone's saliva might be on the leftover food, but he said he couldn't care less.

OP posts:
staceyflack · 08/11/2023 11:33

🤮

Thegreatestgroaner · 08/11/2023 11:38

That’s gross to another level. Can you imagine marrying this man? Dump him now op

crostini · 08/11/2023 11:43

Besides the fact that it's wildly disgusting..... the point of going out to eat, is to eat and enjoy together!
What a weirdo

Locallady2 · 08/11/2023 11:45

Some people learned nothing from covid.

Lolitt · 08/11/2023 11:48

Runki · 08/11/2023 10:36

As I seem to have ended up in the Daily Mail and am a little freaked out by said occurrence 😂, I think I will now refrain from making any further comments on this thread for fear of further daily rag publications! Will be keeping my head down from now on for fear of the paparazzi 😉 Thank you so much everyone for all the words of encouragement and understanding! Be assured that the sausage and toast snaffler will not be entertained by me again! X

On no OP- you are a celebrity now!

Owl55 · 08/11/2023 13:48

Bet he uses newspaper instead of toilet paper too ! Tight sod!

Ilovecleaning · 08/11/2023 15:18

Locallady2 · 08/11/2023 11:45

Some people learned nothing from covid.

Pretty disgusting with or without Covid! Lol 😂

Ilovecleaning · 08/11/2023 16:42

Runki · 08/11/2023 10:29

@SwearyBetty Christ Almighty, I've just looked and can't believe my eyes. Ha ha ha ha 😂 very very nervous laugh. Some of the comments are mental....apparently I am a chubby, benefit scrounging, scrunchie wearing, false nail wearing, Mumsnet chubster who sits on a third hand sofa?! And I must have had boyfriends before so surely that makes me someone's leftovers as well?! I cannot believe that the first time I post on Mumsnet, it ends up in the effing Daily Mail. 😳 Don't know whether to laugh or cry wha ha ha ha 😂 😆 Thank you so much for telling me! It must be a VERY slow news day!

You’ve got a great sense of humour,OP! But what’s wrong with scrunchies???😂😂😂 - I use one to tie up my blue hair!! 🤣🤣🤣

Itisadifficulttime · 08/11/2023 17:01

BrightYellowDaffodil · 06/11/2023 21:34

That would give me the ick so much I’d feel myself slam shut like a startled oyster.

😂

queenMab99 · 08/11/2023 17:16

This is disgusting, but it made me laugh so much!
I'm not sure I would dump him, it is so extreme, it is interesting, you could do a sort of social experiment by taking him to different establishments, and see if there are any food or eating boundaries he won't cross!

SisterhoodNotCisterhood · 08/11/2023 17:21

zoom1982 · 07/11/2023 13:00

My BIL does this. He also purposely sits at a table that needs clearing to then accuse the waitress of removing 'his' food that he hadn't finished eating. This has earned him many a free freshly cooked meal and a ton of apologies from the waitress/manager. He thinks it's amazing,my sister smiles and indulges him. We refuse to go anywhere with them.

I'd love to see a savvy waitress/manager present your BIL with another bill for that table and have him pay for the meals that were on the cheque originally. If he wants to claim it's his table and plates then let him pay too.

webs1991 · 08/11/2023 18:21

Dump ASAP sorry but that’s minging to eat a complete strangers leftovers different if it was off yours. V weird social behaviour

69Pineapples69 · 08/11/2023 18:58

Nope! I would have walked out there and then and ghosted him. Surprised covid didn't wipe him out tbh. Dirty buggar! 🤢

Duechristmas · 08/11/2023 19:01

That would be a hard no from me. At somebody's house maybe, but in a pub?

Gbtch · 08/11/2023 20:51

Wa very entertaining thread, OP. Gave me and a load of strangers on a delayed train from Leeds a real uplift today!
hilarious!

Jcf1977 · 08/11/2023 20:58

Gosh I am massively against food waste and I go to some lengths to avoid it (much more than most people) but that gives me the massive Ick.
It should be frowned upon to leave food in a restaurant and doggy bags should be normalised but eating off someone else’s uncleared table is not great.
saying that the servers probably do it…
He’s setting out his stall and if he’s willing to do this now he won’t stop I wouldn’t say. You are either going to need to get on board the leftovers bus or let it keep driving by…

Doodleflips · 08/11/2023 21:01

BrightYellowDaffodil · 06/11/2023 21:34

That would give me the ick so much I’d feel myself slam shut like a startled oyster.

Thank you, this made me laugh out loud

CloudsNeverStayTheyAlwaysGoAway · 08/11/2023 21:04

Stinginess is a very unattractive trait.

Andilew · 08/11/2023 22:12

You've been seeing him for a while, he's getting comfortable and showing his true colours. This is a huge, neon red flag. Don't look back, just go.

Trappedmumof3 · 09/11/2023 00:53

I think the issue here is not really to do with the food. Yes, what he did was grim but actually for me the problem is that he thought that it was acceptable to go out on a date and then not do what you'd agreed to do - i.e. eat a meal together. It's a bit like if you'd planned to go to the cinema and he sat outside while you watched the movie.

My ex would think that was acceptable (not the eating leftovers but leaving you to eat and pay for a meal alone) and I now realise (too late for me but not for you) that that sort of behaviour is a big red flag.

If you felt even slightly uncomfortable during that date then I'm afraid it's time to accept he's not right for you and move on. That feeling of awkwardness will not get better as time goes on.

NeonSoda · 09/11/2023 07:24

I think the desire to not waste food is really commendable. That’s a fantastic trait in a person.

But I’m not sure I’d want to date someone who took it to that extreme.

Dibbydoos · 09/11/2023 08:29

The responses to your post @Runki made me laugh!

It is gross. He is not a keeper....

vegetation · 09/11/2023 08:40

I would tell my dog off for doing this!

CKMc2b · 09/11/2023 09:24

I understand not wanting to waste food, but the origin is unknown and it's very unhygienic and the people consuming it could have communicable diseases or be on cytotoxic medication (aged care worker here).

Yuck.

PropagandaBat · 09/11/2023 10:06

"If he were really concerned, wud he consider giving the food to a homeless person?"

Wait, so you think it is disgusting that he ate random leftover food but you think a better alternative is to give to a homeless person to eat? Why is that less disgusting to you, and do you think you could explain it in a way that doesn't say you think homeless people are beneath hygiene and standards you'd apply to people with a mortgage?