To think that most women don't even have high body counts?

[etchedowl]

I read this article in the guardian this morning https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2023/nov/03/when-andrew-tate-and-the-online-manboys-obsess-over-a-bodycount-girls-you-know-what-to-do which is a reaction to the current misogynistic male obsession with a woman's body count i.e. how many men she has slept with. Firstly I agree with the article that it is a totally misogynistic trope and not to be tolerated. But Secondly I wonder to myself, who are all these women with large "body counts"?

Most women I know like myself (now in my early 30's) would have dated and had boyfriend in their teens which mostly they did not have sex with then maybe a boyfriend or two they did sleep with before finally meeting the man they are now married to at some point during university or early 20's.

Most women I know were not out clubbing every week, meeting and sleeping with different men every week or month as the paranoid fantasies of these incel men say but were more likely to be tucked up at home with their long term boyfriends and husbands having a nice meal and watching box sets or even playing scrabble. Even the single women I still know will mostly socialise together at home with going out being the odd time rather than it being a bit never ending smorgasbord of hot men and sex!

Do any of these men actually know any women or do they just believe the absolute drivel they read online by shady men who are ultimately trying to sell them a product by capitalising their insecurity and paranoia?

Please note if there are women out their having a whale of a time having tons of sex then more power to them absolutely no judgement from me. The point of my post it that it seems in no way to me the norm for most women.

You know this thread was probably started by an incel who will want us to say « nonsense I’ve slept with 50 men ».

He’ll then link it on some godforsaken forum and people will use it as entertainment and justification for their incel beliefs.

we all know this right?

Most women I know like myself (now in my early 30's) would have dated and had boyfriend in their teens which mostly they did not have sex with then maybe a boyfriend or two they did sleep with before finally meeting the man they are now married to at some point during university or early 20's.

Most women I know were not out clubbing every week, meeting and sleeping with different men every week or month as the paranoid fantasies of these incel men say but were more likely to be tucked up at home with their long term boyfriends and husbands having a nice meal and watching box sets or even playing scrabble. Even the single women I still know will mostly socialise together at home with going out being the odd time rather than it being a bit never ending smorgasbord of hot men and sex

I think we had different friends, OP….

I don't know if you say it was 2 and half people it counts.

I couldn't care less what Andrew Tate says about anything.
No idea what a "high body count" would even be, but I would say double figures is the norm for the women I know (25-35yrs old). Don't know anyone who met their husband in their early 20s, but everyone is different!

Anyone remember that scene with Andie McDowell in Four Weddings? That was a great take on this debate. Always admired her verve, energy and memory!! And there was absolutely no judgement in it.

I have absolutely no idea how many people my friends may have slept with, other than a rough idea of university house mates (lots of casual sex going on within my group of friends).

Im 43, been with DH for 12 years. Before him I’d slept with 10 people I think. I have no idea if that’s considered a lot or not and I really don’t care.

One look at the article and more than one paragraph about the likes of Tate seems a waste of time to read (I can’t understand the desire to write so much about him).

But your life sounds very sheltered. I know many people who married the first person they slept with and many who had quite a few partners by their early 20s (many of those not settling down with someone from that age).

Some people care about their partners sexual history some don’t. I’ve known men and women who both did and didn’t. If someone has a preference regarding sexual history and a potential partner has a problem with that preference then they are obviously not well matched and should not get together. I see no reason to try and shame someone for either their history or their preferences, be open with potential partners and don’t go for someone who doesn’t align with you.

I am nearly 60 and that wasn’t my experience either!

Very judgey post op.

PSA for any watching incels: the common factor for every woman who's ever rejected you is you.

Women don't want your shitty judgemental attitudes, which is why we avoid you.

Gosh who cares? I spent my time at uni out every night, having flings, drinking like a sailor on shore leave, having a grand time and making memories, as were all of my other female friends at that age.

People have different experiences, I’m now 32 and there’s no man in sight (which I’m more than happy about..!); does it really matter?

:) x

It's just silly because who wants a man like this.

Your body count is too high!

Okay, so that's good because actually unless you were going to rape me I had zero interest to start with.

The last bit regarding women who do have high body counts is tacitly, she is a slut. And therefore should be she reject you, you can take what you like.

I know plenty of women who have had more than their fair share, myself included. I was out clubbing in my late teens early and twenties and had would usually end the night with a shag and would go to meet guys for sex. I had a high sex drive and took the risks on board. I enjoyed it and I'm glad I did it now I'm settled down and married. I think you probably had friends that were similar to you but it doesn't mean either/ or is not normal.

Most women I know like myself (now in my early 30's) would have dated and had boyfriend in their teens which mostly they did not have sex with then maybe a boyfriend or two they did sleep with before finally meeting the man they are now married to at some point during university or early 20's

Well, the key words there are 'like myself' - you hang out with people who have similar values and lifestyles and values and you therefore assume that these behaviours are 'the norm'. It might be the norm in your friendship group to have relatively few partners, and I'm sure it's that way for millions of women, but of course, it's very different for some people and I'm not sure it's especially exceptional for women to sleep with a lot of men.

I'm in my late 40s and for me it was: slept with first proper boyfriend (aged 17, year-long relationship) slept with next boyfriend (aged 18, eighteen-month relationship), then had two or three one-night stands at university, then graduated, met a man who I then lived with for three years, then had another two or three one night stands, then two casual 'friends-with-benefits' type relationships that happened concurrently over a couple of years, then I met DP in my late 20s and we're still together 20 years later. We're not married.

So, not shagging someone different every week, but also very different from the 'serial monogamy with three or four people and marriage to someone you met at uni' model that you describe.

Like you say, though, it really doesn't matter. The whole idea of a 'body count' is misogynistic propaganda.

Exactly, so many seem set on giving him what he thrives off: attention.

People really ought to stop referencing him, or clicking on anything referencing him.

I think OP is genuine but you're probably right about incels sharing it. Despite how they, MRAs and all the rest are always banging on about how irrelevant middle aged women are, they sure spend a lot of time on here.

The number of men I've slept with is very small (refuse to use the ugly phrase in the OP), largely because alcohol has the unfortunate effect of making me even more fussy. I've thoroughly enjoyed reading about the fantastic fun other women have had though- keep it up!

@bonzaitree completely agree. OP's wide-eyed "Gosh, I'm racking my brains to think of anyone who's divorced!", coupled with her completely disregarding the repeated retelling of other posters' lived experience is quite telling.

Never heard of a 'body count'

I assumed it was something to do with weight and BMI or people they'd murdered.

For the record, I think the stats say the average 'body count' is 6 for women and more for men. (So some women are extremely busy by those figures.)

I first had sex at 17 and didn't get married till I was 47. No long term relationships in those 30 years (a couple lasted a year).

If I had sex with 2 different men a year that would take me up to 60 sexual partners!

I wouldn't consider 2 a year to be "promiscuous" at all - would you OP? Or 321user123?

I think posters are being unfair on OP saying she is sheltered, Amish, clueless etc. She is posting about her personal experience, as is everyone else. People have different life experiences, different social circles etc. It's neither wrong nor right, just different.

Most women in a relationship would have a body count of at least 2 or 3. It also depends on where you bury them in the garden, underneath the roses provides a decent amount of fertiliser and gives really good growth. As long as you prune them the previous year.

Putting the body straight in the ground aids decomposition and does not provide the environmental damage of using black bags. Also large bodies of water work as well.

This should be the sort of relationship advice that women should give to all their daughters, looking at the vile misogynistic men and toxic environment that they grow up in today.

I think it’s a shame you associate clubbing and drinking with sex though OP. I got into a long term relationship with my now DH quite young (early 20s) but I still had a great time partying, clubbing and travelling with friends throughout my twenties

So glad I wasn't the only one. I thought it might be about some video game fewer women played.

Agree my friends and I definitely had more than just a couple of boyfriends..the experience you describe isn’t typical for me or my friends, now mid thirties. But who cares. I don’t! X

Ah yes, doesn't Andrew Tate exploit trafficked women, boast about pimping his girlfriends (women who think they're his gf), has had several rape accusations, and also boasted about breaking a woman's jaw??

He's clearly a well adjusted, high integrity authority on what women should do and be.