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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Stingy friend send wrong wrong money

410 replies

Rossannah · 29/10/2023 23:15

I have just been away with a friend for 2 nights. An event plus hotel. Cost for the two altogether was £416. I paid for both on my card and told friend to send £200 for her share. She said she would send this weekend, after the event. This was fine.
We went, had a good time. Whilst there, we spent equally. We drank and ate the same. Sometimes paid by round, sometimes separate for eg in a prepay cafe. I don't feel I spent or took any more than my fair share, friend never moaned.
I reckon I spent around £180 in fuel, no mention of this was made, no arrangement for half to be paid by friend and I would have gone alone and spent the same so I was not bothered about paying for fuel myself.
On the way home we stopped at a garage. I filled up the tank, paid at the pump. Friend went in the petrol station and asked if I wanted anything. I gave her an order from subway which was in there, sandwich and drink and some boiled sweets.
We then got on the way. Nice time had by all.
Tonight, she messaged to say she's sent the money she owed. I check and she's put in £290(£90 too much) I reply to say I've got it but it's not what we agreed, confused face, kisses etc ( I did not expect her to pay for petrol) she then goes off on a rant about how she paid for my subway when she went in the petrol station and I didn't offer her any money for it and I was cheeky to expect her to pay for my food. I realised then she had meant to send £190 but has got it wrong.
I wonder how to approach this error given her rudeness and cheekiness over a bloody tenner! Considering I've spent on petrol.
Should I leave it until she realises let her come crawling? Refund her the £100 or £90 as agreed ? No idea. So shocked at her stinginess

I cannot edit the title, I can see the error, haha ironic

OP posts:
LittleMousewithcloggson · 29/10/2023 23:34

I would send the £10 back with no communication - just put subway as the reference for the transaction
then ignore her

Gothambutnotahamster · 29/10/2023 23:35

Overthebow · 29/10/2023 23:18

Wait until she realises then say you thought she had paid you extra to cover her half of the petrol.

Edited

I'd do this!

determinedtomakethiswork · 29/10/2023 23:36

I am so looking forward to the text messages tomorrow!

Tinkerbyebye · 29/10/2023 23:38

I would just wait until she asks. Then I would send back £90. And would tell her she may have paid for the subway, but you paid for the petrol

SleepingStandingUp · 29/10/2023 23:39

Reply "oh yes of course, forgot about that so yes, correct amount. Sorry"

greenhydrangea · 29/10/2023 23:41

Overthebow · 29/10/2023 23:18

Wait until she realises then say you thought she had paid you extra to cover her half of the petrol.

Edited

This.

Rossannah · 29/10/2023 23:42

I've sent her £10 with reference subway.
I originally thought it was£90 extra for fuel but given it wasn't mentioned in her reply, I think it was £100 extra in error. I'll wait for her reply 😄

OP posts:
Bloom15 · 29/10/2023 23:45

jesshomeEd · 29/10/2023 23:22

Or just send her £10 for the Subway and say you're so sorry, overlooked it didn't mean to cause bad feeling. Then if she asks for another £90 back reply that you'd assumed that was to cover her half of petrol.

Yep!

What a cheeky cow she is

LunaDeBallona · 29/10/2023 23:45

I would send £2. (£10 Subway minus half the £16 extra you were not going to charge her for)
Since she is being so petty when you have driven I would match the pettiness- but that’s just me.
If she queries the £100 extra I would simply reply that fuel isn’t free for anybody and you have split it right down the middle and she should consider her self lucky that she didn’t have to do the driving.
I couldn’t in all honesty like her again after such awful pettiness so for me the friendship would have the ‘Ick’ factor.

jannier · 29/10/2023 23:47

"I'm sorry if there's been a misunderstanding I assumed you wanted to thank me for doing the driving and paying for all the petrol, but if one subway costing X is too much for you after me paying £y let's agree to split it 50/50 next time"

SM4713 · 29/10/2023 23:48

Thanks for the update OP- I await any update from her tomorrow 😂

Kastri · 29/10/2023 23:49

jesshomeEd · 29/10/2023 23:20

I'd say no problem, £200 for your share of the £416 for event/hotel, plus £90 for your share of fuel - I'll send you £10 for my Subway.

Do this!

porridgeisbae · 29/10/2023 23:51

@Rossannah I wouldn't mention the £90. She might've meant to send it after all, and by rights it should be what you got anyway as it's her half of the petrol costs.

honeylulu · 29/10/2023 23:51

Yessssss OP! Excellent!

I would have sent her £2 because her half of the hotel was 208 and her half off the fuel was 90 =£298 but you are so sorry you forgot to deduct the £10 for subway so she only owed you £288 and overpaid by two quid!!!

NotSuchASmugMarried · 29/10/2023 23:54

No I don't think she did mean to send petrol money. The OP makes sense. She told her to send £200 over but her friend deducted £10 and sent £190 over. Only she pressed a 2 instead of a 1 and sent 290 over by mistake.

I wonder what she'll say when she realises.

KissyMissy · 29/10/2023 23:56

Totalwasteofpaper · 29/10/2023 23:20

Leave it and say nothing.
If she mentions it point out it covers the petrol ie she paid half.

Maybe send tenner back for the subway?

But ultimately never have anything to do with this woman again.

Yes, perfect response

RantyAnty · 30/10/2023 00:00

I can't wait until she realizes she sent more than she thought lol

Starseeking · 30/10/2023 00:02

Rossannah · 29/10/2023 23:42

I've sent her £10 with reference subway.
I originally thought it was£90 extra for fuel but given it wasn't mentioned in her reply, I think it was £100 extra in error. I'll wait for her reply 😄

Brilliant!

JennyJenny8675309 · 30/10/2023 00:06

AutumnFroglets · 29/10/2023 23:21

Wait until she asks then match her sandwich outrage with your petrol outrage.

Sandwich outrage vs. petrol outrage. 🤣😂

IHateLegDay · 30/10/2023 00:11

Placemarking as I can't wait for her to realise 😂😂😂

ChateauMargaux · 30/10/2023 00:14

I think you should have left it... said.. 'Oh. Ok. .. all square then.' If she does come back for the £100.. itemise everything..
£418
£180
÷2 = 298.. so it looks like you owe me another 8.. but as you were so cut up about the samdwich.. I will let it go. Sorry that the weekend wasn't quite what you were expecting.

RomeoandJomeo · 30/10/2023 00:14

HoHoHoliday · 29/10/2023 23:31

"I realised then she had meant to send £190 but has got it wrong."

What makes you think this? Did she say herself that she meant to send £190 but got it wrong or have you assumed?
It looks to me as though you agreed £200 for half of the event/hotel and she's added another £90 for half of the petrol.
You've then complained, and implied that she should pay more, so she has argued back to point out she paid for your subway.
Sounds like a miscommunication to me.
But since she's aid you for her share of everything you should pay her for your subway.

This is my thinking too.

Taiquando · 30/10/2023 00:16

I see it in exactly the same way as HoHoHoliday.

PositanoBay · 30/10/2023 00:18

I thought it was a case of you thinking she was paying for the petrol but she hadn't, and you'd gone off without paying!!!

AllWeWantToDo · 30/10/2023 00:20

I don't know why you sent her money, she's obviously sent you 290 instead of 190 and had already taken money off for the sandwich