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AIBU?

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Original poster

In trouble, I grabbed the best room!

347 replies

Singletraveller · 27/10/2023 19:49

I'm on holiday with a group of mates; they have partners and I dont. Last time we went away together the couple that arrived first at the cottage grabbed the best room, with no shame or negotiation! We all ended up joking that this time round we would race eachother for the best room...all a bit whacky races and jovial! Anyway, I got there well before anyone else for various travel related reasons, so grabbed the best room. Big with an ensuite. The other rooms were nice just a bit smaller...one didnt have an ensuite. Anyhow, one of the couples has kicked off - because Im single, I shouldn't have the biggest room apparently. Given they're all essentially nice rooms, this feels a bit shitty...should I have quietly taken a 'lesser' room just because I'm a solo traveller?? All so petty I know, but peed off at the sour atmosphere after all the joking about rooms in the run up.

OP posts:
2023forme · 27/10/2023 20:37

I can see it from both sides but if I was the single traveler, I’d have nabbed a smaller en suite. The couples will likely see it as spending more money than you but getting a poorer room.

Don’t be too surprised if the issue sorts itself out via the trips becoming couples only!

mrmagpie · 27/10/2023 20:38

The 'who got there first' bit is actually, on reflection, a completely juvenile nonsense.

I assume you are all adults with jobs? Maybe with children or other responsibilities? Who live differing distances from the holiday place possibly? With different cars or other travel arrangements? It's completely ridiculous to assign rooms based on how fast you got to the destination. How bizarre.

Iwasafool · 27/10/2023 20:39

If you all go away again I don't think they will let you have a discount, if you want equal chance of the best room I think you would have to pay equal.

Onesipmore · 27/10/2023 20:39

I can't think of anything worse than having to 'race' to get my room. There is no way as one person that I would have taken the largest, best, ensuite room. I would have taken a double with ensuite. Do you need the biggest room as one person?

Gnomegnomegnome · 27/10/2023 20:41

You stuck to the ‘rules’. Remind them of that.

Assuming that they all have double beds, Why should the couples have the biggest room?
How small are the smaller rooms? Big enough not to be tripping over each other?

Iwasafool · 27/10/2023 20:41

HelloItsMeHowAreYou · 27/10/2023 20:25

In total, but not per person. Plus they have 2 incomes and OP just has hers.

Show quote history

So should they all pay based on what they earn?

WiddlinDiddlin · 27/10/2023 20:43

Nah, they started it with you having a shite room last time and then the 'who gets there first' shit.

You KNOW either of the couples had arrived first, they would have taken the best room with no qualms.

You know if you'd arrive last, you'd have had the shit no en-suite room.

If they want fairness over rooms, sort it some other way, in advance.

Nevermind91 · 27/10/2023 20:44

It all sounds a bit selfish really.
If you'd all grab the best room given the opportunity, without regard for others, then it's just underlined that you don't think much for each other.
Resentments are there if you choose to look for them.

jlpth · 27/10/2023 20:47

I would have taken the smallest room with an ensuite.

I think it's a bit off to have taken the largest ensuite room when you paid less for a room than the others.

I don't think you should have got the shittest room, particularly as you were there first - but to take the largest when everyone else is two per room seems a bit odd. They presumably have double luggage/shite so taking the biggest one was not on IMO.

Spottydogtoo · 27/10/2023 20:47

I wouldn’t have the cheek to take the nicest/biggest room if I was having a room to myself and everyone else had 2 people per room. I can’t believe anyone would do this? Completely selfish. I’d be really pissed off if someone did this.

pictoosh · 27/10/2023 20:49

jlpth · 27/10/2023 20:47

I would have taken the smallest room with an ensuite.

I think it's a bit off to have taken the largest ensuite room when you paid less for a room than the others.

I don't think you should have got the shittest room, particularly as you were there first - but to take the largest when everyone else is two per room seems a bit odd. They presumably have double luggage/shite so taking the biggest one was not on IMO.

I think I'd have done the same. I'd have made a practical decision while making sure I had my own bathroom.

Jimmyneutronsforehead · 27/10/2023 20:51

I suppose it depends whether you want to be right or want to be happy?

Can't imagine your mates scoffing at the fact you got the biggest room all holiday is going to be fun.

But now every ones here I'd just stick with it cos otherwise every one will want to play musical bedrooms.

HoHoHoliday · 27/10/2023 20:52

So long as everyone has a bed to sleep in then I don't see the problem. You are on holiday to enjoy time with your mates, you aren't all spending the weekend in your bedrooms!
If any of the others had requests about who gets what then they should have spoken up earlier, but no one did, and you all joked about getting there first to claim the best room.
Your friends who are now complaining are in the wrong, they've created a bad mood in the group. Fine for them to feel a bit miffed but they should have kept that to themselves and arrived first next time.

IfYouDontAsk · 27/10/2023 20:53

I think if you’d all chipped in the same amount per room then it would be fair game, but if you’ve paid less for a room than the couples I think it’s pretty unfair to have taken the best room to be honest.

Best to draw straws or to decide in advance who’s going to have each room.

Olika · 27/10/2023 20:56

Well at least you keeping that room saves the couples arguing who takes it.

Creatingspace · 27/10/2023 20:56

Huhuhuhu · 27/10/2023 20:27

If you read my earlier comment I did say they should have agreed beforehand - although I still think it's a bit of a dick move. I was replying to your comment on single people being seen as 'less than' a couple.

That part is wrong. She would only be seen as such if they had made her pay full price, like the couples. Regardless of the rest of life being more expensive, blah blah as @FarEast said not relevant.

Not related to this situation but :

The reason why singles pay more for hotel rooms again not because of 'discrimination' it's because the fixed costs for a room regardless of the number of people is a much bigger proportion of the cost! Many don't understand this. but then again, they don't understand basic arithmetic.

A couple share a room. A single person has their own room. If the single person opted to share a room with a friend (as I have done, with twin beds) they won't pay so much! Equally if you choose to share a house instead of having your own flat. It's a choice to do things alone. Relationship status doesn't come into it.

Edited
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I know why singles pay more for hotels etc, it's called a single supplement. I don't need an explanation. I stand by my comment that society is geared towards couples and families. Single people are constantly reminded of that. I genuinely don't understand what the problem is if the agreement was 'first come, first serve.

I wouldn't have a problem if I were on the same holiday as OP. You clearly would. It's a difference of opinion that's all.

Stravaig · 27/10/2023 20:57

You deserve the bigger room as recompense for having such shitty friends.

Grumplechops · 27/10/2023 20:58

I think the hilarity may have been people’s attempts at highlighting that it caused resentment last year. So it’s been brought up in a joking way instead of being made an ‘issue’.

i don’t think it was true banter - more a plea for things not to happen like that this year. So I think you’ve caused resentment by carrying on the ‘tradition’ started last year. I can see how you thought it was ok as no one moved past the banter stage and actually said - ok, so let’s allocate rooms by drawing straws - before anyone got there.

I don’t think it’s really about you being single (Altho maybe that is a part of it seeing as you could’ve taken the smaller room with en-suite?). Think it’s more that some people in the group are fed up with the grabby approach to rooms.

Mummyoflittledragon · 27/10/2023 20:58

angsanana · 27/10/2023 20:10

So a couple are paying more for a smaller room with no en-suite? Yes you're being unreasonable.

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Exactly. I wouldn’t go away with you anymore op. You should take the cheapest room with grace.

TomatoSandwiches · 27/10/2023 20:59

I think you won the race fair and square so enjoy your room and do the ner ner at the moaner.

DaisyAster · 27/10/2023 20:59

OP is proportionately more out of pocket than anyone else, it's fine.

DaisyAster · 27/10/2023 21:01

Also, I've never been to an airbnb where price has been split by room, it's always been done pep person

JaninaDuszejko · 27/10/2023 21:02

I think since you paid more than any other person and arrived first it's fine. And a bit off of the others to complain so vocally.

And I say that as the family who arrived last on a family holiday and ended up with the smallest bedroom despite being those who organised the holiday. DM is very much is of the opinion that DBro (single) is more important than me and my family so was mainly annoyed that she allocated him the largest room and me and DH got the smallest because it was very much a case of 'know your place least important child'.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 27/10/2023 21:03

It's just another example of how people are seen as 'less than' when single rather than part of a couple.

Of course they aren't 'less than' in the important things relating to them as people, but they are 'fewer than' in pure numbers!

I hate the way single people are always an afterthought & expected to have the smallest rooms etc.

So you think that two people should have a smaller room than one person? If you had three children and they needed to share two bedrooms between them, would you really give the bigger of the two rooms to the child on their own and the smaller one to the two who were sharing?!

In total, but not per person. Plus they have 2 incomes and OP just has hers.

But they aren't looking to have a bigger room per person - they're perfectly happy to share.

Huhuhuhu · 27/10/2023 21:04

Grumplechops · 27/10/2023 20:58

I think the hilarity may have been people’s attempts at highlighting that it caused resentment last year. So it’s been brought up in a joking way instead of being made an ‘issue’.

i don’t think it was true banter - more a plea for things not to happen like that this year. So I think you’ve caused resentment by carrying on the ‘tradition’ started last year. I can see how you thought it was ok as no one moved past the banter stage and actually said - ok, so let’s allocate rooms by drawing straws - before anyone got there.

I don’t think it’s really about you being single (Altho maybe that is a part of it seeing as you could’ve taken the smaller room with en-suite?). Think it’s more that some people in the group are fed up with the grabby approach to rooms.

I agree.
@Creatingspace Grumple put it better than I could. I don't think people were actually being serious, it was 'banter' so the 'they agreed first come first serve' doesn't really hold true.

But in that case, they should really have wo(man)ned up and discussed it like adults. Instead of this happening.

I'm beginning to think that the resentment isn't' actually directed at the OP but the chaos and grabbiness in general.