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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

In trouble, I grabbed the best room!

347 replies

Singletraveller · 27/10/2023 19:49

I'm on holiday with a group of mates; they have partners and I dont. Last time we went away together the couple that arrived first at the cottage grabbed the best room, with no shame or negotiation! We all ended up joking that this time round we would race eachother for the best room...all a bit whacky races and jovial! Anyway, I got there well before anyone else for various travel related reasons, so grabbed the best room. Big with an ensuite. The other rooms were nice just a bit smaller...one didnt have an ensuite. Anyhow, one of the couples has kicked off - because Im single, I shouldn't have the biggest room apparently. Given they're all essentially nice rooms, this feels a bit shitty...should I have quietly taken a 'lesser' room just because I'm a solo traveller?? All so petty I know, but peed off at the sour atmosphere after all the joking about rooms in the run up.

OP posts:
Creatingspace · 27/10/2023 20:18

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

peenaction · 27/10/2023 20:18

I'd have taken the smallest room with an en suite in that situation. Bonus for getting there first, but not grabby when you've paid less overall than the couples have. Given that you've paid more per person, though, you shouldn't have the smallest/worst room just because you're single.

MerryChristmasToYou · 27/10/2023 20:19

Shouldn't you be sleeping on the couch, @Singletraveller ? Wink

DDivaStar · 27/10/2023 20:19

Previously it was first cone first served so YANBU.

However I think just for others practicality and comfort I would have chosen one of the smaller ensuite rooms.

Creatingspace · 27/10/2023 20:21

Huhuhuhu · 27/10/2023 20:15

Actually the couples get the shit end of the stick. They are paying to share a room. OP is paying for her own!

Show quote history

Then that should of been agreed on beforehand. Like the OP said no one had a problem until it was her that got the best room. If the agreement was first come first serve then you can't be annoyed about it. That's my opinion and I say that as part of a couple.

theduchessofspork · 27/10/2023 20:24

Probably not the best move, given you got a discount - nicest view, sure - but biggest room, no. So you can either style it out or offer to swap.

Foodorder · 27/10/2023 20:24

If you paid less for being single, I think you should probably have the smaller room.

In reality, I can't imagine actually complaing about it though

FarEast · 27/10/2023 20:24

Tinkerbyebye · 27/10/2023 20:11

No and I would be telling them to grow up

you got there first, last year another couple got there first and took the room with no negotiation

end of discussion

This.

And re paying: in a cottage/holiday home, everyone's paying for a bedroom PLUS the kitchen & living space. So all of the guests, in couples or not, have equal access to the communal living spaces, and that should be accounted for per person.

Single people generally have a more expensive life. Living costs are not half of what a couple's living costs are, and there are very few things that are not priced around two sharing. especially when you're travelling.

So your friends should suck it up, and recognise this. As well as recognise that you all jokingly agreed to a race, and you won.

Don't capitulate @Singletraveller

HelloItsMeHowAreYou · 27/10/2023 20:25

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 27/10/2023 20:09

I think they do have a point if the couples have paid considerably more in total per room than you have, though.

In total, but not per person. Plus they have 2 incomes and OP just has hers.

DisforDarkChocolate · 27/10/2023 20:26

You were first. If they wanted anything different it should have been arranged beforehand.

TheMadHattter · 27/10/2023 20:27

Yer I think you're being quite unreasonable taking the biggest room. Why didn't you take the smaller one with ensuite? You paid less per room compared to everyone else so you shouldn't really get the best room.

The money situation sounds like a mess too. Next time perhaps either say you want to pay per person and you'll take the smallest room or pay per room and then you can take what you like. At least then everyone's clear where they stand.

Our friendship group do these trips quite a lot and the people that arrive first are always really gracious and allocate rooms based on practicalities so everyone's as comfortable as possible. The best room usually goes to person who organised trip as a thank you.

Huhuhuhu · 27/10/2023 20:27

Creatingspace · 27/10/2023 20:21

Then that should of been agreed on beforehand. Like the OP said no one had a problem until it was her that got the best room. If the agreement was first come first serve then you can't be annoyed about it. That's my opinion and I say that as part of a couple.

Show quote history

If you read my earlier comment I did say they should have agreed beforehand - although I still think it's a bit of a dick move. I was replying to your comment on single people being seen as 'less than' a couple.

That part is wrong. She would only be seen as such if they had made her pay full price, like the couples. Regardless of the rest of life being more expensive, blah blah as @FarEast said not relevant.

Not related to this situation but :

The reason why singles pay more for hotel rooms again not because of 'discrimination' it's because the fixed costs for a room regardless of the number of people is a much bigger proportion of the cost! Many don't understand this. but then again, they don't understand basic arithmetic.

A couple share a room. A single person has their own room. If the single person opted to share a room with a friend (as I have done, with twin beds) they won't pay so much! Equally if you choose to share a house instead of having your own flat. It's a choice to do things alone. Relationship status doesn't come into it.

MontyDonsBlueScarf · 27/10/2023 20:28

OP has paid more for her holiday than any other individual, why shouldn't she have the room she wants?

heheheheh · 27/10/2023 20:28

Singletraveller · 27/10/2023 20:02

@Jackiebrambles Its tricky tho...I have paid more per person for my break....but less per room, if you see what I mean.

So something like -

Each couple paid £150 (£75 each) for a room
You paid £100 for a room

I assume the basis of this arrangement (you paying less than each couple) is that you were meant to have a smaller room? Am I getting it right or misunderstanding?

MeinKraft · 27/10/2023 20:29

hardknocklifeforme · 27/10/2023 20:13

Yikes - I think you're a bit cheeky - it's a bit awkward. Think you should have had smaller room but with en-suite.

Tbf they all sound cheeky so maybe OP should just fill her boots.

Foodorder · 27/10/2023 20:30

MontyDonsBlueScarf · 27/10/2023 20:28

OP has paid more for her holiday than any other individual, why shouldn't she have the room she wants?

Because she's paid less for the room. I'm single too and it's a frustration, but why would the more attractive room be cheaper?

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/10/2023 20:31

I assume the basis of this arrangement (you paying less than each couple) is that you were meant to have a smaller room? Am I getting it right or misunderstanding?

Depends if there was a food/booze kitty. Could be that.

SaturdayGiraffe · 27/10/2023 20:31

Had this once. The single person in the double room got angry when we explained that the single duvet on the bed in our room wasn’t enough to cover both of us (it was cold at night).

mrmagpie · 27/10/2023 20:34

If I was you, I'd have taken the second best room (double with en suite) in a kind of 'split the difference' effort.

That said, if I was actually doing this sort of trip I would have wanted to arrange the room situation in advance, because this kind of thing stresses me out. If DH and I were getting the only room without an en suite, for example, then I wouldn't be happy paying the same as the people with a bigger room and en suite. I'd also probably pack a dressing gown for going to my showers and stuff. It all seems like the kind of thing that would make me anxious to thing of it as a 'race' to get the best room.

Anyway, that's all by the by and you're there now, but I think you have probably been a bit of a dick here. Not because you are single but because your household paid less than everyone else's.

pizzaHeart · 27/10/2023 20:35

I agree that it depends on why this room is better. Is it about view or is it about size of the bed? Big difference.

Willyoujust · 27/10/2023 20:35

heheheheh · 27/10/2023 20:28

So something like -

Each couple paid £150 (£75 each) for a room
You paid £100 for a room

I assume the basis of this arrangement (you paying less than each couple) is that you were meant to have a smaller room? Am I getting it right or misunderstanding?

Show quote history

Exactly this. I wouldn’t be happy having a small room with no en-suite if I had paid more for the room than you. Sorry but you are being unreasonable.

ShatteredPeace · 27/10/2023 20:36

Without having any way to articulate why I think you've been a bit off, I think you have been. I just know it's not something I would do, I'd rather sleep in a smaller room with a clear conscience. I'd be a little bit unimpressed with one person taking the biggest room. The whole grabbing the biggest room is not cool anyway in my view but I'm a middle child.

caringcarer · 27/10/2023 20:36

You are paying less than a couple. You should have taken a smaller room as you doing need the extra space. You could still have got one with ensuite just not the largest room.

Zanatdy · 27/10/2023 20:36

You should have taken the smallest room with an en-suite. If you’ve paid the least and have the biggest room, I can see them being annoyed. Especially given only you in the room, so less space needed. I think it’s just about being fair about it, and I think their comments are a bit unfair in all honesty, but you should also bear in mind you paid less so perhaps taking a big room was a bit unfair

heheheheh · 27/10/2023 20:36

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/10/2023 20:31

I assume the basis of this arrangement (you paying less than each couple) is that you were meant to have a smaller room? Am I getting it right or misunderstanding?

Depends if there was a food/booze kitty. Could be that.

Maybe I'm thick but I don't understand, being in a couple doesn't make you eat less. When I've stayed with friends (mix of couples and singles) we all pay equally per head towards the booze/food fund. But we do split the cost differently based on room size because a couple doesn't necessarily need 2x the space, just 1x or 1.5x.