Page 11 | Or is this hen do behaviour a bit off?

TheMadHattter · 2023-10-26T14:28:49+00:00

I've just arrived at a hen do that has been arranged and booked for months. 2 days ago a couple of the bride's friends said they are only staying for one night now so it will cheaper for them - however as it's an Airbnb the overall cost has not changed so the remaining 6 of us have had to chip in to make up the difference for them pulling out of the second night. I was already a bit miffed about this and now I've just arrived and the two friends who have done this have claimed a bedroom with double bed and ensuite. They have said me and SIL can have that bedroom tomorrow night once they leave and until then we can sleep on the fold out bed in the lounge. I know usually it's first come first served and we were the last to arrive, but as they've pulled out and made it more expensive for everyone else I think they should be on the fold out bed. I don't particularly want to sleep in their dirty sheets either. I don't know these friends and I don't want to spoil it for the bride so I've just gone along with it but inside I'm pretty annoyed and just think this is rude behaviour. AIBU?

Puzzledandpissedoff · 27/10/2023 10:27

Frankly I'd be out of there; it's clear you're there under sufferance to soak up the costs for those they really wanted, and that only the bride's side count

I'd make sure to apologise to the bride though, and explain exactly why you're leaving ... unless it turns out she also thinks this is all a jolly good idea, in which case you'd be well rid

Itsbritneybitch22 · 27/10/2023 10:28

I wouldn’t even call them CF most of these people are actually cruel.

Who would leave any person with no bedding or pillows? Disgusting and tbh I would have gone back to air b&b early and got in the bed.

MinnieL · 27/10/2023 10:29

This sounds like the hen party from hell. Surely the bride isn’t oblivious to everything that’s going on?!

Isthisreasonable · 27/10/2023 10:30

Presumably the broken bed settee was in the living area so OP couldn't go to sleep before everyone else went to bed. Hopefully she announced she was going to bed and slept in the double room regardless of all the crap in there.

I'm sure the one nighters will be suddenly decide to stay a second night with the encouragement of the others.

If the bride hasn't mentioned anything to you about your obvious lack of facilities (surely she should be embarrassed by the bed situation) I'd be leaving ASAP. The text by a pp was great, but after a night like last night I'd just quietly leave without saying anything but let the groom know exactly what went on.

Cosyblankets · 27/10/2023 10:31

So if they get a refund of one night because they changed their mind you should get a refund of two nights and go home!
No bedding
No pillows
And you're pretty much subsidising day guests with the use of the hot tub etc that you've paid for!

IActuallyDidItMyself · 27/10/2023 10:33

MargotBamborough · 27/10/2023 10:09

But they discovered this before they went out. The MoH should have been straight on the phone to the host telling them to come and sort it out.

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I'm definitely not defending the MOH or the bride's friends – they sound absolutely awful!!! I was just replying to the posters saying that the Airbnb had clearly been booked for less people. I just can't believe that no one would share bedding?! OP should get out of there asap and should def be getting a refund!

Cosyblankets · 27/10/2023 10:35

Merrymouse · 27/10/2023 09:39

To be fair on the MOH, organising a hen party can be a bit of a nightmare, particularly with hens like this. However, even if you want to support the bride, it sounds as though things are just going to get worse, particularly if everyone is drunk.

Be polite but honest and cut your losses now.

It's not so hard that you can't count the number of people needing a bed though.
Clearly she didn't book enough or she'd have contacted airbnb host to say we've booked and paid for X and there's only beds and bedding for Y.

MargotBamborough · 27/10/2023 10:38

IActuallyDidItMyself · 27/10/2023 10:33

I'm definitely not defending the MOH or the bride's friends – they sound absolutely awful!!! I was just replying to the posters saying that the Airbnb had clearly been booked for less people. I just can't believe that no one would share bedding?! OP should get out of there asap and should def be getting a refund!

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I think it'll be a cold day in hell before the OP and her SIL get a refund.

It's clear that the intention was to get them to subsidise the rest of the party.

But I would still try.

HundredMilesAnHour · 27/10/2023 10:43

I'd also be wondering if the day guests are breaching the terms of the AirBNB. The whole thing sounds like a complete pisstake.

MainlyOnThePlain · 27/10/2023 10:55

HundredMilesAnHour · 27/10/2023 10:43

I'd also be wondering if the day guests are breaching the terms of the AirBNB. The whole thing sounds like a complete pisstake.

Yes, there can be insurance implications for hosts if there are more people in the property than are on the booking, especially if the host has ticked the 'no parties' box on the restrictions.

Movinghouseatlast · 27/10/2023 11:10

I would have a look at the listing. What is the maximum occupancy? Is the sofa bed actually listed as a bed?

Some people charge extra to use a sofa bed and therefor don't supply linen for it unless there has been an extra payment. ( personally I think this is stupid and time consuminig but it's how some hosts seem to operate)

So it could be they didn't actually 'book ' the sofa bed. If they did, and it's been paid for, you could contact the host yourself to ask for bedding for it if the MOH wont. There should be a number to call in the welcome book/ house manual.

It sounds to me like these people are taking the piss out of you AND the host who probably hasn't agreed to any 'day guests'.

Awful people.

LumiB · 27/10/2023 11:10

I think you said you have to give the extra accommodation money in person. I would flat out refuse, especially since everyone else refused to give blankets! If you want cover the bride but to honest I wouldn't even do that.

Just don't hand over the additional cost because of how you've been treated.

Birch101 · 27/10/2023 11:24

Ok seriously they sound like awful people. You and SIL need to sit the MOH down and get her to photograph and message the owners of the Airbnb requesting a partial refund as house is not suitable to sleep required guests and then get that money back for yourselves and watch her as she does it.

wineandmaltesershappyme · 27/10/2023 11:24

With no bedding i'd have gone and crashed in with them, cheeky fuckers taking that room when not staying the whole time or checking that the fold out bed was equipped.

Thebigblueballoon · 27/10/2023 11:32

Thinking about it, I suspect that these absolute cheeky fuckers are doing this on purpose to push you out. If you go home - having already paid more than your fair share for the trip - they’re bound to stay over in your room with their CF non paying arsehole friends. and there’s nae chance you’re getting a refund as they’ll whine that it was your choice.
If you leave, you need a plan of sabotage.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 27/10/2023 11:37

The behaviour is terrible, you shouldn’t have been asked to pay extra and you should have got a proper bed.

however, I am confused by all the posters saying I can’t believe people won’t share bedding with you. How do you share bedding without sharing a bed? I mean I could understand if there are extra pillows etc that they could give you those but beds normally just come with 1 sheet and 2 duvet so how do you share that.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 27/10/2023 11:38

I'd be tempted to suspect the Host has tried to reduce costs by not adding in the right number of guests. So paying for (eg) 12 but the property sleeps 14 so they can save money. Which means the property was only supplied with linens for 12.

Does it work that way? Everywhere we've stayed charges you for the accommodation and doesn't give you any discount if there are (or claimed to be) fewer people than it could hold.

MargotBamborough · 27/10/2023 11:38

Thebigblueballoon · 27/10/2023 11:32

Thinking about it, I suspect that these absolute cheeky fuckers are doing this on purpose to push you out. If you go home - having already paid more than your fair share for the trip - they’re bound to stay over in your room with their CF non paying arsehole friends. and there’s nae chance you’re getting a refund as they’ll whine that it was your choice.
If you leave, you need a plan of sabotage.

Edited

This.

They'll get a two night stay in a nice bed for the price of one and OP and her SIL will have a one night stay without an actual bed for the price of two.

FrogFighter · 27/10/2023 11:38

I guess this is getting resolved now but I don’t know if i would speak up as it’s a trade off between feeling pissed off that you’ve been ripped off and feeling really awkward in front of people you don’t know - and having to spend time with them. They sound horrible so I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up being mean girls about it and making you feel uncomfortable.

I would probably just not stump up the extra cash when asked for it and just pay my share, leaving it to the MOH to sort out.

she then has the option of either asking you for the deficit, or them. If she asks you, I’d just say ‘I’m paying for two nights right?’ And let her explain why it’s you who has to pay and not them.

she won’t be able to do it without sounding unreasonable thus you’ve made your point without making yourself the target.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 27/10/2023 11:40

OP and her SIL will have a one night stay without an actual bed for the price of two.

Nope, that will be for the price of three (or at least a share of). They were also expected to pay the cost of the CFs' second night back to them after they decided they would go cheap by cutting short their agreed stay.

Whataretheodds · 27/10/2023 11:41

What unbelievable behaviour! My brothers would have gone apeshit if we'd been treated like that at my SIL's hen parties!

whynotwhatknot · 27/10/2023 11:42

op said she already paid so the cfs got their money back -youre being a bit meh about it tbh who the hell doesnt give someone a pillow for the night or call to get more bedding

MargotBamborough · 27/10/2023 11:45

FrogFighter · 27/10/2023 11:38

I guess this is getting resolved now but I don’t know if i would speak up as it’s a trade off between feeling pissed off that you’ve been ripped off and feeling really awkward in front of people you don’t know - and having to spend time with them. They sound horrible so I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up being mean girls about it and making you feel uncomfortable.

I would probably just not stump up the extra cash when asked for it and just pay my share, leaving it to the MOH to sort out.

she then has the option of either asking you for the deficit, or them. If she asks you, I’d just say ‘I’m paying for two nights right?’ And let her explain why it’s you who has to pay and not them.

she won’t be able to do it without sounding unreasonable thus you’ve made your point without making yourself the target.

I assumed the extra cash had already been paid to the MoH.

Otherwise there is absolutely no fucking way with bells on and a cherry on top the OP and her SIL should be handing over another penny.

Personally I would have said no to the extra amount from the beginning. Obviously if you only staying one night rather than two doesn't change the overall cost for the rest of the group then you should not be refunded anything. The MoH should have shut that nonsense down immediately.

But if you arrive at the Airbnb to find that the two cheapskates have bagged the nice room and left you the sofa with no bedding, if there is anything left to pay you would have to be a complete and utter mug to pay it.

I'm afraid I'd have been slinging their bags out onto the landing saying, "You have paid less than everybody else for this accommodation, therefore you get what is left when everybody who has paid the full amount has chosen their bed."

LumiB · 27/10/2023 11:45

Oh doh I didn't read the OP post - she has already paid the additional amount. I would just now suck it up as the moment has passed. No wedding gift or spending any other money on the wedding then.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 27/10/2023 11:45

Slightly off-topic, but I never understand the thing about Air BnBs or holiday accommodation being allowed to boost their claimed occupancy numbers by including sofas/sofa beds/pull-out mattresses etc.

To my mind, a sofa bed is what you might have in your own home for when somebody stays over for a night or two as a 'that'll do' solution when no money is changing hands.

Why would you deliberately book accommodation for a certain number of people but then choose somewhere too small, so that a few people who draw the short straw just have to make do without a bed - even though they've paid for the accommodation as well?