To not pay for her ticket or any part of it?

[HalfTermDayOut]

Half term next week. Going to an attraction with my DD (aged 9) and my mum.

I get DLA for DD, so my ticket is free as a carers ticket (and I always spend in the gift shop/experiences while there to make up for it).

Mum invited herself to come along, so I said she’d have to pay for her own ticket.

She’s saying no, either she gets in on the carers ticket and I pay for my ticket or we split the cost of 1 adult ticket equally between us so it’s cost us both the same.

I don’t care if she comes or not, DD is not bothered if she’s there or not. She wants to come because she has serious FOMO and won’t miss out on something.

So WIBU? Me or mum?

Vote:
YANBU - Don't pay any part of her ticket
YABU - Split it or let her in for free and pay for yourself

Don't worry @Wonkasworld it's usually a private business so you aren't subsidising it with your tax money 🙄 and who are you to decide what a necessity is btw?

These people saying that is unfair for the OP to get a carers ticket - do you imagine the cost is coming out of your taxes or something?!

It's up to the owner of the attraction if they want to give out free carers tickets. It doesn't make any difference to your lives whether she gets in for free or not.

Of course it's snide.

All of these activities will have a range of prices thanks to memberships, online offers etc. Not everyone there on a given day will have paid the same price for the same experience. The (private) company has chosen to reduce the price for families with disabled children, to make things more affordable (I'm sure you know it's more expensive to be disabled, and many parents of disabled children are forced to give up work to take on a caring role) and offer a little light relief.

I think it's awful, snide, mean, to begrudge that.

Your mum sounds very entitled

I totally agree that carers should get discounts or other concessions, absolutely. They work damn hard. I just think 35 quid for an attraction is a bit much as a freebie. A proportion of it free, eg 50 per cent, fair enough.

Do you have to pay for DD, or has she got a free ticket?

I don't actually think that your mum should get a freebie, and I think she should be discouraged from inviting herself. BUT.... if you are feeling bad about this (and you obviously are to have posted here), one compromise would be that you pay half each for one adult ticket BUT she pays half for DD to go. So she pays half an adult ticket - £17.50, plus half of your DD's ticket, £9. This means that your ticket ends up costing you £8.50, which might be worth it if you are, indeed, feeling bad.

There is NO WAY she should get away with paying half for an adult ticket and not contributing to DD's ticket. That, or the expectation of that, would make her eligible for the official CF award.

But why do you care? You don't own the company, it's not coming out of your pocket. It's a nice thing to do, why not just think that and move on.

Oh my gosh you’re right. How dreadfully frivolous. Quick let’s stop this wasteful offer of discounted entry for disabled individuals and their carers. The uk economy will be soaring again in no time!

I take it, @Wonkasworld, that when you are of pensionable age you will not be using any discounted travel cards, restaurant deals, days out or tv licence schemes? Because you’ll only be focussing on the necessities of eating a subsistence diet, having a set of clothes that fit and a sheltered place to sleep?

I think the tax payer cares.

Nor me.
I'd gladly pay.
Saying you don't care if she's there is not pleasant. Sounds like you don't like her much.

This was my thought too, so there must be something behind this (what sounds like) animosity.
Also the "I don't care if she comes or not..." to me is weird. I can understand, I'm happy to go without DM but this phrasing also reads like there's a big back story.

What on earth does it have to do with the taxpayer?

I don't think you have the foggiest what we're talking about.

One thing I've learned since having a complex needs child, is just how much an unfortunate number of people begrudge the disabled and their families.

One of these days I'll learn not to click on these threads, but today is not that day.

Yes. Why should carers get a freebie. They’re raking it in on their carers allowance… 🙄

What a world we live in when people grudge an essential carer getting free entry somewhere

Well according to MN, pensioners should get crumbs, so as I will have paid into my pension, I will spend it how I see fit.

I had to stop working because my son require 24hr supervision all day all night, I have to take him with me at 7yrs old to the bathroom when I use the toilet and shower.
I have to administer multiple medications and daily therapies and I sleep a maximum of 2hr sections throughout the night because his condition affects sleep and he can not be alone.

I get carers allowence of £76.75 in my own name.

Please tell me again how a free ticket is too much of a freebie.

Should disabled people sit at home and stare at the wall, only leaving the house to attend medical appointments? I'll let DH know that I'm trading in my disabled bus pass for a hair shirt immediately.

You should work for the DWP.

Wtf does the policy of a private company have to do with the tax payer?

It's a reasonable adjustment to enable access for the person with disabilities.

Why would the taxpayer care? They're not paying for the attraction. It's probably a neutral cost to the company, in that without such concessions the chances are that disabled people wouldn't visit the attraction - hence they would lose out on the cost of their tickets plus everything else they might fork out for such as meals, souvenirs etc. So there is minimal or no loss in terms of tax take.

Why would a taxpayer care that a private business allows carers in for free? It doesn't cost the taxpayer anything, they have no say in how a private business decides to discount entry 🤷‍♀️

Tell her you are looking forward to a day off if she is going as dd's carer and getting the free ticket.. She sounds like a sponger to me.

Both sound like tightarses. Her to ask and you to refuse. What a barrel of laughs.

Having had to leave multiple attractions early due to my child’s disability, I’m very grateful for carers’ tickets as it makes my soul sink less that I’ve not paid a fortune for the hour we spent there. Begrudging carers of children a free ticket is a new low.

It's a private company not funded by the government what has it got to do with the taxpayers?

Incidentally carers allowance IS TAXABLE