Trackers on phones - weird or not?

[Judijudi]

Someone I know their entire family uses a location tracker on their phones for everyone in the immediate family, husband, son, son’s girlfriend, sister, nieces, nephews, parents. They all have it. I don’t know how often the others use it but frequently this person will say, oh I see sister has come home early from her holiday, or son’s girlfriend- oh she must’ve got out of bed to go to the hairdressers, you get the jist.
I find this really really weird and a total invasion of privacy. It actually gives me the creeps! I can see how it would be handy if someone unexpectedly goes out of touch and their is an actual reason to want to know where they are like they’ve gone hillwalking and not returned when expected or if it is someone vulnerable etc.
What do you all think?
YABU this is perfectly normal behaviour to track the movements of your entire family
or
YANBU it is TOTALLY weird and an invasion of privacy verging on stalking behaviour

Im with you. Weird.

my best friend says I’m weird for not tracking my kids/husband/parents.

They wouldn’t share their location if they felt it was an invasion of privacy. Each to their own. YABU.

It's weird to have it on the whole family.
DH has a tracker on my phone, but it's for good reason, I am often off road, off grid, and in dangerous locations.
For the same reason, he also has got me a Spot locator/GPS thing and has back country rescue insurance on me , and first aid/survival bag for the vehicle.

YANBU it is weird
It might make sense for someone who is vulnerable in some way... but generally nope!

Well, trackers on phones aren't weird. Google's found my phone for me twice this week 😄The group sharing you describe does sound weird to me - but, then, so does constantly updating everyone via social/messaging apps. People who'd do the latter, with all their status updates and check-ins, would probably find the tracking less intrusive and more efficient!

It depends on your family really tbh. I'd find it odd, but someone else might be happy enough with it. That said, it wouldn't bother me if H wanted it (as long as it was reciprocal). It just depends what you're comfortable with.

Is it by mutual consent? Not weird then, their choice.

Any consent issue = extremely weird/police. Simple?

If it's like the free family tracker we have, it sort of merges you all anyway. So we got the tracker for DS (me and DH) then I added my DM to it so she could see DS when she is picking him up (he has SEN) Then she added my brother to it. So now we have me, DH, the kids, my mum and brother all on it. So essentially my DH can be tracked by his MIL 😅 I suppose it does sound weird really. So, although I voted YABU because we have it, you're not actually BU thinking it's weird.

Some people like having them, others don't.

As long as everyone who is sharing their location is doing it of their own freewill the only people who are being unreasonable are those who are so narrow minded they think their opinion is the only right one.

one lovely winter afternoon i took my son-in-law for a snowy walk in the hills not far from my home.
son-in-law wanted to go a different way (breaking trail was too hard).
first thing we knew the sun was setting and oh my that "where are we" feeling came up on us.
thankfully i location share with my dh, who knew exactly where i was and where i would come through to the road and was able to meet us (as we were seriously off the path and 5+ miles from home).
we location share, and each have the find my phone/bike/wallet etc on all of our devices. it's come in handy on a few occasions (phone left on a ferry, ipad left at a school).

We've all got Snapchat as the eldest is away at uni and uses it.

My OH can see where I am on snap maps when I'm out and about travelling for work. When I go pick up the eldest, he can track me getting to the halls and have coffee waiting for me and to make sure he gets up!!

I'm don't give it a second thought to be honest and often forget about it. Never bothers me that they can see where I am.

Dp and I track each other because we think it's funny. We'll message each other saying "Ooh, what are you having for lunch?" Or "Don't be daft-it's raining. Get a taxi!"
But I think, contrary to Mumsnet canon law, that tracking kids is weird and intrusive. Cue the "but it's for their safety!!" posts. No it's not. It's so parents can helicopter.

There's a middle ground. 'Helicopter' is a bit inflammatory. It's not unusual to want to know what your kids are up to. It's responsible. There are plenty of people who will pile on over latchkey kids ffs. There's a middle ground, as there is with everything under the sun.

You can’t do this unless the other person agrees to it. So in your scenario if they’re all adults and happy with it, why not?

My family (me, DH and 2 teens) are all on Life360. I mostly use it for practical things like seeing they’re almost home so I can put the pasta on. I do use it for peace of mind when teen DD is on her way home after dark. She’s very independent but I worry. My brother doesn’t use a tracker app but instead peppers his daughter with calls and texts if she’s late. I can just check the app and think ok she’s on the bus. It does tell you if they’ve run out of battery which is handy if they’re not responding to texts. For DS it was very useful when he left his phone on the train!

When they’re adults it will be their choice whether to leave it on. DD currently shares her location with close friends so once she goes to Uni she might delete me and keep her friends on it! I have a friend who is a bit obsessive about it with her young adult children and seems to check it constantly. I am definitely wary of becoming like that. DD17 is out today and it wouldn’t occur to me to check it unless she’s on her way home alone and it’s dark.

@Chickenkeev "There's a middle ground. 'Helicopter' is a bit inflammatory. It's not unusual to want to know what your kids are up to."

It's not unusual-that doesn't make it right! And middle ground? How would that work? I used "helicopter" deliberately, by the way.

We don't track each other. Dd went through a phase of wanting me to use it for her, I said no. I think it sets an unhealthy precedent that is ok for people who love you to want to control you. Also we grew up before mobile phones/social media so for me knowing where some one is all the time seems weird to me.

My DD shared her location with all her friends. I think it’s a bit much but I don’t care.

My other daughter shared her location with me years ago as she used to do a long drive on a known drug highway at night. I could make sure her car was still moving until she arrived safely. Now she’s on a world tour, so if I forget where she is, I can have a quick look!

I think maybe it is a bit generational. I am in my 50s and very definitely don’t want to be tracked or track anyone else. I am aware that younger people seem to see it as normal though.

I wouldn’t like it- I’m not anywhere my dh doesn’t know I am at any given time but I still think it can be creepy and intrusive

my friend has it for her entire family, including her parents. She’s constantly tracking her 15 year old son.

I made a decision not to track my kids. I understand why people do, but disagree with reasons for it. (Main exception is medical reasons).
I know there has been instances in DD2s class (now Yr6, but this was Yr5 in the summer) of parents thinking the child was happy in the park... but the phone was in the oark, the child wasn't. Complete false sense of security.

When we first got our security camera DH would text me saying "Oh where are you off too?" And it did freak me out a bit... unintentional and he stopped doing it. So its partly my dislike of being watched that makes me anti tracker. DH agrees.

My DD has just gone to uni and suggested that we have life 360 for just the 2 of us as she knew I was worried about her getting home safely after nights out. I’d never heard of it but I must admit that it is nice to be able to click on it in the morning and have it tell me that she arrived back to her room at whatever time.

Each to their own. It’s entirely voluntary. Me, wife and daughter all have find my iPhone enabled. Daughter (19) no longer has to share her whereabouts with us but she chooses to do so.

it’s also very handy to see when someone is due home from work.

@Chevvi "it is nice to be able to click on it in the morning and have it tell me that she arrived back to her room at whatever time."

But what if she wanted to go back to someone else's room?

@Collaborate "it’s also very handy to see when someone is due home from work."

Why would you need to know that? Surely if anyone's going to be late they send a quick text...