Page 9 | I want to move to countryside but DH not sure

MaybeRural · 2023-10-20T12:34:36+00:00

I'm fed up of city life and want to move to somewhere more rural, not to a really remote location but definitely to a place where I am not woken by car doors slamming, neighbour's children screaming from all sides, excessive traffic noise etc. DH is a city boy through and through and thinks we'll hate country living. I've been studying the online property websites and have found three houses to look at this weekend. He says he might be 'too busy' to come with me. So AIBU if I go and look by myself and try to persuade DH to at least consider moving? There's nothing keeping us here really because we both WFH and can work anywhere and have no dependent children or family nearby. Has anyone else moved to the countryside during Covid or any other time and did you love it or hate it? Obviously, I'd like some 'good news' stories to tell DH but perhaps I need the realistic ones to stop myself going off on a romantic quest for something that won't actually make me happier?

KnickersOfDoom · 23/10/2023 19:19

We moved to a very very tiny town 10 years ago and both work from home! It has everything we need, great community, music venue, pubs, countryside walks, views, cafes, library, bank, shops, public transport to 3 cities. Never looked back. Would never live in a city or suburbs again.

Ykn · 23/10/2023 19:29

MaybeRural · 23/10/2023 19:05

I'm glad that your life is so well ordered but, sadly for me, mine can be messy at times. Unless we view properties in different counties, how will DH and I know what we want? You cannot be naïve enough to think that the property market is the same in every single county? Take it from me, some counties are more expensive, others less. It is simply impossible to get the feel of both a county and its housing stock by perusing RighMove, no matter how assiduously one goes about the task. Drive by viewings won't work either for the most part will they? How do you know if the rooms are like a series of tiny rabbit warrens? If the plaster is falling off the back bedroom ceiling or the carpets would put a 1980's sweaty nightclub to shame?

I will not be joining the National Trust either, thank you. I object strongly to many of their policies and will not financially support them.

Why do you believe we have been dishonest with any estate agent? Have you proof to back up your assertion?

Finally, our finances are in order. Why do you think they are not? Again, can you prove your wild accusation? Do you want to see our bank balance?

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Good grief OP. @paintingvenice has a valid point about you potentially being a time waster. But EAs are desperate for buyers at the moment, so their bar is low.

Never mind what your DH wants, so long as you get what YOU and YOU alone want nothing else matters, does it?

Original poster

MaybeRural · 23/10/2023 19:36

Ykn · 23/10/2023 19:29

Good grief OP. @paintingvenice has a valid point about you potentially being a time waster. But EAs are desperate for buyers at the moment, so their bar is low.

Never mind what your DH wants, so long as you get what YOU and YOU alone want nothing else matters, does it?

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Um, please take this as I mean it, kindly ... but your post is unhinged 😂Thanks for taking the trouble to type it all out. I shall remember to kowtow to my husband's every whim from this point onward as a result of following your excellent advice. Or will I?

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Eve223 · 23/10/2023 19:45

MaybeRural · 23/10/2023 19:36

Um, please take this as I mean it, kindly ... but your post is unhinged 😂Thanks for taking the trouble to type it all out. I shall remember to kowtow to my husband's every whim from this point onward as a result of following your excellent advice. Or will I?

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Unhinged? Why are you so rude to anyone who dares to disagree with your idea?

Photographsandmemories · 23/10/2023 19:56

Only on Mumsnet would you be judged for something as ordinary as viewing a rental. Do these people test-drive cars? Accept free samples of perfume? Go on a date with a man without determining in advance to marry him?

Original poster

MaybeRural · 23/10/2023 20:00

Eve223 · 23/10/2023 19:45

Unhinged? Why are you so rude to anyone who dares to disagree with your idea?

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Ha ha, you're a card! To put your mind at rest I've checked with my DH to see if I'm bullying him and he's reassured me that he's well able to defend himself from my vicious attacks 😆I've not asked the estate agents if I'm mistreating them but I'm sure they'll love it that you're standing up for them. It must make a refreshing change for them 🤗

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Original poster

MaybeRural · 23/10/2023 20:01

Photographsandmemories · 23/10/2023 19:56

Only on Mumsnet would you be judged for something as ordinary as viewing a rental. Do these people test-drive cars? Accept free samples of perfume? Go on a date with a man without determining in advance to marry him?

You have to wonder don't you? 😯

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seasideoap · 23/10/2023 21:33

APurpleSquirrel · 23/10/2023 19:10

Good luck with your search OP.
I live on the edge of a rural market town in Somerset. We love it here - so close to beaches, moors, forests, rivers, hills etc. lots of stuff on locally, two cities less than an hour away, access to culture, heritage, activities etc.
only downside is public transport but then I prefer the convenience of a car, not at the mercy of strikes for one! We even have fibre broadband

When I hear about a place like this, I always want to know where it is! Planning on a move to Somerset next year, plan to explore the Wells area

APurpleSquirrel · 23/10/2023 21:55

@seasideoap it's Wellington, Somerset, just over the border from Devon - you pass the Wellington Monument (obelisk) on the M5.
Can get to Exeter & Bristol in under an hour, Plymouth & Cardiff too. Train line into London in under 2hrs; M5 on the doorstop, easy to get on to North Devon Link Road & A303/358 east.
Can get to the Devon beaches easily; Cornwall is less than 2hrs away.
Theatres both regional & local; lots of historical sites, attractions, cinemas, restaurants, airports, museums etc.
we can access the things people come on holiday for, but all year round & our town isn't a tourist destination so it's not overrun.
The M5 can be problematic in summer but that is true all over.
But obviously a car is a must.
Wells is a lovely little city too.

seasideoap · 23/10/2023 22:00

APurpleSquirrel · 23/10/2023 21:55

@seasideoap it's Wellington, Somerset, just over the border from Devon - you pass the Wellington Monument (obelisk) on the M5.
Can get to Exeter & Bristol in under an hour, Plymouth & Cardiff too. Train line into London in under 2hrs; M5 on the doorstop, easy to get on to North Devon Link Road & A303/358 east.
Can get to the Devon beaches easily; Cornwall is less than 2hrs away.
Theatres both regional & local; lots of historical sites, attractions, cinemas, restaurants, airports, museums etc.
we can access the things people come on holiday for, but all year round & our town isn't a tourist destination so it's not overrun.
The M5 can be problematic in summer but that is true all over.
But obviously a car is a must.
Wells is a lovely little city too.

Thank you, that's on my look at list too. Currently in East Kent

Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 09:16

@MaybeRural I’m selling my house right now, fields and farm up the lane behind us (including house with stables) yet 10 min walk to main line station (London 40mins), shop and pub three minute walk - sounds perfect for you 😁

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MaybeRural · 24/10/2023 10:21

Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 09:16

@MaybeRural I’m selling my house right now, fields and farm up the lane behind us (including house with stables) yet 10 min walk to main line station (London 40mins), shop and pub three minute walk - sounds perfect for you 😁

Sounds great but I hope I've not committed myself to buying it, sight unseen, by replying to you 😂

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Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 10:56

@MaybeRural god, how rude, I was just trying to help. If I tell you it has off street parking AND a garden will you buy it now? 😁

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MaybeRural · 24/10/2023 11:04

Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 10:56

@MaybeRural god, how rude, I was just trying to help. If I tell you it has off street parking AND a garden will you buy it now? 😁

Yes, I am fully committed and will definitely buy it now 😁Who do I make the cheque payable to? Just rushing off to find my cheque book ... haven't used it in years so the dog may have eaten it ... bear with me ...

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Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 12:53

@MaybeRural well that’s terrific news! But I only take bitcoin. Or you can pay me in NFTs (which are surely just limited edition PDFs?) ™️ ©️

purplecorkheart · 24/10/2023 13:01

Honestly it sounds like your are very resentful of your dh.

Personally I would rent a holiday cottage in a rural location for two weeks in November if you can both work from home and see what the reality of living in the country before going to the expense of renting for six months.

Original poster

MaybeRural · 24/10/2023 13:02

Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 12:53

@MaybeRural well that’s terrific news! But I only take bitcoin. Or you can pay me in NFTs (which are surely just limited edition PDFs?) ™️ ©️

Yes, yes, I agree to it all 😆

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Lastnightschips · 24/10/2023 13:05

@MaybeRural and people say selling houses is hard!

Original poster

MaybeRural · 24/10/2023 13:05

purplecorkheart · 24/10/2023 13:01

Honestly it sounds like your are very resentful of your dh.

Personally I would rent a holiday cottage in a rural location for two weeks in November if you can both work from home and see what the reality of living in the country before going to the expense of renting for six months.

Noooo, I love him 😁I didn't have to be a trailing wife but I chose too so that he could pursue his career whilst I just had various jobs. We've been on plenty of rural holidays and we both enjoy them but holidays aren't real life so it's hard to decide if he'll be happy in the countryside long term. Pretty sure I will but a 12 month lease on a country cottage won't kill him for sure.

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