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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WWYD - Intervene or keep walking?

268 replies

StepInOrLookAway · 16/10/2023 15:27

Group of 9 kids, boys and girls, around 11 years old. One boy on the ground with 4 boys standing over him, at least one pushing down on him.

If you witnessed this would you intervene? If not, why not? Out of fear for your own safety? Would you alert anyone else? No judgement, just interested.

OP posts:
Mrsgreen100 · 17/10/2023 19:48

Similar situation but older boys
kicking a guy in the head on the ground
I just called out look out there’s the police
and nipped away
they all ran for it

TicTac80 · 17/10/2023 19:53

I have intervened in the past, and recently too (for adults and for children). I would hope that someone would stop to help if it was my child that was being set upon.

CelestiaNoctis · 17/10/2023 20:02

A simple "Oi!" would disperse them tbh. I'd probably phone the police then say that and say like "hey, don't I know your mum?" to one of them in particular and they'll most likely run off. Then I'd help make sure the kid got home alright.

Lollipop81 · 17/10/2023 20:11

I would like to think I would intervene. But who knows until they are in that situation.

Loveaholidayor2 · 17/10/2023 20:18

I have intervened in the past and would do so again. Once the child needed help and the second time everyone scrambled so I don’t know. There’s a need to help and j am so glad you did. Be proud of your actions.

Ejismyf · 17/10/2023 20:21

I would, I intervened with an older, bigger group last month trying to attack an adult male. Turned out the guy totally deserved it and had done something horrific but I still got in my car and called the police as I was worried one of the boys would bottle him and he'd be in even more trouble. Police never turned up anyway.

Gnomegnomegnome · 17/10/2023 20:24

In the past absolutely yes but due to trauma I wouldn’t physically intervene but would call the police from a distance.

Hazey19 · 17/10/2023 20:27

I would definitely intervene. I have children around this age and could never ignore it

hiredandsqueak · 17/10/2023 20:34

I have encountered this situation and did intervene putting on my best school teacher voice and naming the ones hitting the other child (they went to the same school as my own dc) and demanding they stop. It probably shocked them into stopping as other adults had walked by. I walked the victim home, spoke with their parent and I reported it to school as it was on the way home from school and trusted that they would address it.

jcsc · 17/10/2023 20:39

I would 110% stop and intervene. I have done in the past when I’ve witnessed another child get picked on and stopped and got out my car. I wouldn’t hesitate to do so again. One day that could be my child on the floor being bullied and picked on. It enrages me when I see and hear this behaviour and no one steps in.

Bluetrue · 17/10/2023 20:45

11 years old...yes, i would intervene and make sure the poor boy got home ok. Either I would take him or ask his parents to collect him.

I intervened when a group of 14/15 year olds were assaulting a girl.

My thinking is always, if that was my child, i would 100% want an adult to intervene. Wouldn't you?

JosieJasper · 17/10/2023 20:48

Absolutely I would at that age!

AHG123 · 17/10/2023 21:06

Intervene.

Mummyto2rugrats · 17/10/2023 21:06

Same as @OTM1982 intervine had it happen to my y6 boy at the time y10 strangling him we only found out via social media when a parent described him and what happened we asked snd he admitted what had happened which we then reported to the police who proceeded to do nothing. I had a friend who did intervine and unfortunately ended up dead by 1 punch from another adult but that wouldn't stop me especially with teenagers and I always believe he was doing the right thing however unfair that we lost him to it.

Pack mentality and bullying gets my goat,

Barney60 · 17/10/2023 21:08

yes i would.

pinkstripeycat · 17/10/2023 21:08

Stand right next to the group with my phone to my ear and say loudly “Police please”

pinkstripeycat · 17/10/2023 21:10

I rang a local school when I saw girls from they school attacking another. A group of teachers came racing up the road to stop it

saffy2 · 17/10/2023 21:39

I would intervene. If I thought I might be in danger doing so I would call the police from nearby but I wouldn’t leave.

MightyFishwife · 17/10/2023 21:45

Pathetic

threatmatrix · 17/10/2023 22:19

I would not hesitate to intervene. Just like I’d like someone to intervene if it were my child. Can’t believe there are people out there that wouldn’t.

BubblesMacgee · 17/10/2023 22:26

Have intervened a few times in these circumstances. Some scarier than others, have previously hauled the victim out from the middle pointing out that we are under CCTV. Hate bullying and work alongside local schools so, like others have stated, might be a case of wielding authority from my job. Would say that this scenario is becoming more usual around where I live, sadly.

FrecklyFrog · 17/10/2023 23:38

I would and have before with slightly older kids. I ignored a situation like this when I was about 17 and felt terrible about it for ages afterwards.

Blueink · 18/10/2023 00:58

Intervene

T1Dmama · 18/10/2023 01:19

woulducouldushouldu · 16/10/2023 15:53

I was recently waking behind 4 boys around the same age. 3 were goading 1 to come out with them and nick some stuff from Sainsbury's. The 1 didn't want to and was
Saying that he had to go home. I piped "if he has to get home let him go home". Some lovely colourful language followed from the 3 (naice MC area N London) but the 1 took this an opportunity to walk off. The 3 let him be. As he turned a corner he simply said "thanks". I had thought not to intervene but was glad I did.

I’d have them called the shop and pre-warned them that 3 nippers were on their way to steal from them, giving descriptions…. Or even followed them to the store and told the security in person.

T1Dmama · 18/10/2023 01:25

LalalaIcanthearyouO · 16/10/2023 20:36

‘The police are on their way and I’ve got you on camera - now get off of him!’

This