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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not understand how Hannah Ingram-Moore can lie so unashamedly?

264 replies

TigerQueenie · 12/10/2023 16:15

So she's admitted keeping over £800k of the money raised for herself. Claims it was her fathers wish, even though it wasn't documented anywhere, that the proceeds from his book stay in the family. The foreword of the book talks of his delight to be able to raise even more money through sales of his book. She claims nobody has been mislead.

And then cried.

How is there not being a bigger deal made of it?

OP posts:
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6
Salacia · 12/10/2023 17:47

Monkspath · 12/10/2023 17:42

Talking of shameful behaviour. Maybe this shameful speculation about a man who's no longer here to defend himself, is uncalled for. The daughter is fair game, Captain Tom is not. You crack on though and fill your boots.

To be fair you could say the same about his first wife who he was happy to share intimate details about with the nation.

Merryoldgoat · 12/10/2023 17:48

I detested the whole thing to be frank. I can’t even put my finger on why exactly, but it felt like a performance somehow.

Gall10 · 12/10/2023 17:50

My impressions 4hey were behind him with a whip on every circuit of that garden.
Also terribly dismayed when I read an interview with the old philanderer that he though Bois Johnson was the best prime minister we ever had…and what 99yr old guy has a visit to the Caribbean during a world wide pandemic on his bucket list?. Maybe that was on daughter Tom’s list!

Terrifyingface · 12/10/2023 17:51

Zebedee55 · 12/10/2023 17:36

I never gave to this. The NHS should be funded properly through the government - not charity.

I think Covid was an odd time - people got involved with things they wouldn't normally have got sucked into.

But, the old boy raised some money whatever, so I suppose a good cause got something out of it somewhere.

But, I think that he, and the public, were manipulated from the start.😗

Couldn’t agree more with your first line. This is exactly what David Cameron wanted from his ‘Big Society’ - for charity to step in and provide originally state funded services. This is a return to the days of charitable organisations feeding children in poverty and the church keeping people out of the workhouse. The government want to collect taxes and rely on the third sector to deliver the services we pay for. It’s appalling.

Monkspath · 12/10/2023 17:53

You can see where this thread is going. It's already at gutter level.

Runnerinthenight · 12/10/2023 17:56

No point in an investigation.

MN posters have it all sussed, apparently...

Litchrally · 12/10/2023 17:57

AndIKnewYouMeantIt · 12/10/2023 16:40

It was the Military angle, right? We're all supposed to go all gooey over little old men in medals. We're the nation of Help for Heroes bumper stickers.

What a shitty thing to say @AndIKnewYouMeantIt

horseyhorsey17 · 12/10/2023 18:00

She is a piece of work.

CaptainJackSparrow85 · 12/10/2023 18:02

@Monkspath what’s making you so angry about it?

The truth is that none of us know whether Captain Tom was in on it. You can’t assume someone lacks mental capacity just because they’re old - that’s incredibly patronising.

BeaLola · 12/10/2023 18:02

I hope she gets what she deserves

I guess if you lived nearby you would be hoping that she wo up d have to demolish the "spa" aka an office that was built without apparently all the correct permissions

Meeting · 12/10/2023 18:03

She's an absolute disgrace. Looking forward to watching her interview with piers Morgan tonight to see what she's got to say for herself.

SkyFullofStars1975 · 12/10/2023 18:04

Captain Tom gave everyone a little hope and a little light in a really bleak time.

It's not his fault that his daughter saw the money she could make from it all.

What amazed me at the time was that no one actually seemed to twig that the money wasn't for the NHS, but NHS charities together. The website is vaguer than vague and seems to encompass 230 individual charities.

DonnaTellMeThis · 12/10/2023 18:04

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Emotionalsupportviper · 12/10/2023 18:04

FofB · 12/10/2023 17:08

Because now most people don't believe in a God, in times of stress some want to believe in something or someone. And during a frightening pandemic, people believed in what Captain Tom was doing to help the NHS. They rooted for his efforts and this made them feel a bit better about the world outside their window, even if for a little while.

His family capitalised on this. And took the money.

Even Richard Dawkins has said that belief in a god/gods provided an evolutionary advantage.

Humanity is designed to believe in a deity. It bonds the tribe, gives hope, prevents panic, and controls bad behaviour - the rules come from a Higher Being. It's not just another Human Being (king or whatever) telling people what they should/ shouldn't do. For the commandments to come from God gives them weight.

whynotwhatknot · 12/10/2023 18:04

shes a grifter how shes getting away with it i dont know

the holiday was ill advised the middle of a pandemic with a 100 yearv old man

AndIKnewYouMeantIt · 12/10/2023 18:06

I'm not meaning to be "distasteful" or "shitty". Someone said they didn't know why it gathered so much momentum, and it wouldn't have without the "Captain". Quite honestly I find the exploitation of the status of elderly veterans for charity purposes distasteful, particularly families pushing their family members into public appearances when very elderly and infirm. They're also one of the most vulnerable groups to elder abuse.

Veterans Elder Abuse - Nursing Home Abuse Guide

In 2014, the Veterans’ Affairs hospitals scandal swept the national news. In these investigations, it was revealed that VA Hospitals have been providing inadequate service to veterans for a long time. Many former servicemen are asked to wait months or...

https://www.nursinghomeabuseguide.org/elder-abuse/veterans

Chickychoccyegg · 12/10/2023 18:07

The daughter is adamant the money from the book was for the family, this will be investigated and no doubt we'll find out one way another.
The fundraising from walking around the garden was donated straight to nhs charities together, direct from just giving? I think , so she would have no access to that money.
The whole Captain Tom thing always felt a bit odd, people were bored, worried, and all sorts of other emotions so latched onto something which seemed nice .
I'm sure like most people Captain Tom was far from perfect, and there's no point in anyone making up personality traits for him.
It's odd how outraged people are , feeling they've been robbed , either way, you gave to charity, all charities take a large proportion off .

Sceptic1234 · 12/10/2023 18:07

Apart from anything else........army officers below the rank of major cannot use their military rank as a title once they go back to civilian life. Right at the start he was just "Tom", then he quickly became "Captain Tom" which sounds absolutely dreadful to any person with a military background (just like it did with "Captain" Mark Phillips). Even senior officers need permission to use Major, Colonel etc post retirement. A naval Captain in much higher rank than an Army Captain - very definitely a senior officer.

GentlemanJack · 12/10/2023 18:08

A scammer and a grifter. Just like Jack Monroe. Latch onto the zeitgeist and milk it. It's no dfferent. Hopefully her income stream will dry up. The dimwits who continue to support Jack carry on to sustain her lifestyle at at the very least £3000 a month.

TitusMoan · 12/10/2023 18:09

Contraryjane · 12/10/2023 17:26

It was her behaviour at Wimbledon that disgusted me.

What was this?

Roussette · 12/10/2023 18:09

It's the pure greed that gets me. £7,600 to her for 'travel expenses' during just a 3 month period.
£18,000 for appearing at an Awards ceremony of which she gave £2,000 to the Foundation and pocketed the rest. All whilst being paid £76,000 as CEO of the Charity.
£800,000 paid to her own Company from the books he wrote, even though the Prologue of one of them by Capt. Tom said how pleased he was that profits from the book would go to the Charity. They have now said they would keep the money from the books again if the occasion arose.

Both me and my DCs found it unsavoury and crass at the time, and we didn't donate. However, whilst it was all going on, we kept our views to ourselves because people were so caught up in it.

I don't blame Capt. Tom. He was very elderly and probably listened to his children. But it's interesting that the other daughter had nothing whatsoever to do with this.
I also blame the BBC for forcing it down our throats just about every morning on Breakfast News.

TokyoGhoul · 12/10/2023 18:12

I've reported this thread.
It's utterly grim.
'Old men in medals, taking him on holiday to kill him, elder abuse, gross name calling the women, I knew from the beginning she was a wrong un, he was probably horrble too.'.

It's one of grimmest examples of frenzied blood smelling I've seen.
You reveal yourselves.

nettie434 · 12/10/2023 18:12

She clearly knew how to use PR to make sure her father got vast amounts of media attention. There have always been people who exploit people's generosity for their own purposes. That's why the Charity Commission was founded in 1853. However, this foundation (as opposed to the money that went to the NHS) seems to have operated on a vast scale. The sad thing is that it has contributed to a huge amount of cynicism about charitable giving.

Mavgoose · 12/10/2023 18:15

It's a wonder how the charity made so much money with the hindsight lot coming out the woodwork 🙄

ForfarBridie · 12/10/2023 18:17

Nice men don’t talk about the sex life they had with their first wife and comment as he did. Some things are best left unsaid.