Husband fed me a food he knows I have never eaten and never willingly will

[Anon39]

I came back from taking our son to training and as I walked back in my husband asked me if I wanted a sausage sandwich I immediately said yes

started eating it and he said do you know what those sausage are? And I replied in the negative and he started to chuckle and said “do you like it?” So my hackles were up I stopped eating and asked for the package of sausage

he started getting defensive and I just knew it was black pudding (which I do not eat and have never eaten and he knows how I feel I have no feelings if you do eat it and that’s not the point of my post)

I found the package and it was black pudding sausage I was so upset he knew I would never have willingly eaten black pudding. I feel so betrayed and I’ve ended up crying and he has basically told me to grow up and stop being so dramatic he can’t understand why I’m so upset

it’s not really about the food it’s about the breaking my trust I would never think to question him about what type of sausage they were because I trusted him

not to drip feed I am Autistic so I am aware I have issues around food

yes you’re being unreasonable and should have checked (after 20 years of marriage)
no - your partner deliberately betrayed your trust

Also well said! You're so good at expressing the issue here! I can't believe people don't get it.

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE SAUSAGE IT'S ABOUT WHAT IT REPRESENTS

"IT'S NOT ABOUT THE SAUSAGE IT'S ABOUT WHAT IT REPRESENTS"

This. X10000

There is blood and all manner of things in sausages. This thread is a massive over reaction by some very highly strung people. No wonder relationships don't last when people are saying to end a 20 year relationship over this! Imagine your parents getting divorced because dad gave sausage eating mum, a bit of black pudding 😆

They only contain about 10% black pudding. YABU. But I did give my DD duck without telling her what it was.

@PandaExpress My mum put up with at 10,000 incidents as unpleasant as this one.

I wish she hadn't.

Yeah, all a big piss take isn't it. What a closed mind you have

There is nothing else in the OP that suggests he's an abuser!

Not at all. I have an autistic adult child myself. I know food aversions. This thread however is completely bonkers.

Which is why my advice is if it's massively out of character fine people make mistakes IF it ISN'T massively out of character this is definitely abusive.

Doing stuff that is preplanned and designed to upset you, then mocking you for being upset - yeah if this isn't a weird blip you're better off alone.

And nothing to suggest he isn’t !!

Borrowing megaphone from Rosscameasdoody

IT’S NOT THE FOOD, IT’S THE FACT THAT HE FED IT TO HER WITHOUT HER CONSENT.

I can only guess some posters can't hear because they are deafened by the noise of the point swooshing over their heads.

AND POSTERS ARE COMMENTING ON WHAT AN OVER-REACTION AND UNNECESSARY DRAMA THIS ALL IS
for all the reasons above

I don't like to shout, but it seems that's the way you like to communicate

My DH hates courgettes with a passion. He wont eat them and doesn't want them on his plate. I make loads of meals with courgette in, he doesn't even realise and eats it. I feed them to him WITHOUT HIS CONSENT! For shame!!
The only difference here is the blood product element. But as the OP eats sausages anyway its null and void.
It is not matter for divorce, no matter how loud you shout it.

Oh come on, it's hardly abuse. If it was tricking you into eating meat then I'd be outraged for you, but this is just fussiness. My DH claims not to like tomatoes, and yes sometimes I cook with tomatoes and he eats it and enjoys it and then I tell him it has tomatoes in. Trying to broaden somebody's taste so they aren't always dictating a narrow available menu isn't abusive.

I've just finished my DHs choc buttons WITHOUT HIS CONSENT, he'll be starting a thread tonight no doubt!

All these posters are outraged on the OP's behalf. And yet in the thread where an idiot teacher encouraged a primary school aged child with celiac disease to eat gluten, and then laughed when her mistake was pointed out, so many people defended the teacher and thought the OP was being unreasonable to complain.

What was that you said about stupid analogies ? 🤔

Were they the same posters who are defending the OP on this thread?

What was that you said about stupid analogies ?

Wow, I really got to you didn't I? 😆

Not. The. Point.

As a parent of children with potentially fatal allergies, respecting people's boundaries around food - even if you happen to think they're a bit stupid - is HUGELY important. Not only is it a mark of respect that all deserve, but in rare cases it will also stop you being responsible for someone's death.

I hope your loved ones know this about you and avoid eating at your place.

It was a deliberate move, he knows you have a problem with it. I’m appalled that someone who is supposed to love you would do that. Just why?

And eating blood pudding is very different to the concept of eating all your veg.

It’s in the New Testament - so in theory should be standard for all Christians. In reality most probably never twigged the verse as too busy worrying about other random stuff.

Acts 15:29
“It is the decision of the holy Spirit and of us not to place on you any burden beyond these necessities, 29namely, to abstain from meat sacrificed to idols, from blood, from meats of strangled animals, and from unlawful marriage. If you keep free of these, you will be doing what is right.”