To be annoyed with a stranger telling me to 'cheer up'

[canwetalkaboutcake]

I've just been out for a walk to town. A man of about 60 passed me and told me to 'cheer up'.

I am not cheered up, in fact I'm pissed off. Why do strangers think it's acceptable to say this to someone - I could have just received bad news or be going through something terrible.

I felt like telling him to piss off but I'm too timid to do such a thing.

Love it - noticed the downward glances though 🤣

Fuck no that’s not what he meant.

He was old fashioned and sexiest and women are supposed to smile and look pretty.

My friend and I got in last year from a random bloke and we're in our 60s!!

Age will not protect you

Agree

"OK random man"

@EasternStandard what are you not getting?

Oh look, another thread bashing P.
A plethora of other threads are that way🔁🔝⏬
Feel free to peruse at your leisure.

Not really worth discussing as it was deleted anyway.

I get it.
My dog passed away suddenly on Tuesday and ever since then I've been wanting someone to say it just so I could shoot them down.
Not usually an angry person I'm just grieving.

I get this a lot.
One Monday morning a man called out 'Cheer up, It's only work.'
Another time 'Cheer up' then to the person he was with 'Christ, aren't people so miserable these days ?' Both said by, guess who. Men.
I wouldnt say it to anyone. You never know what people are dealing with.

@Graciebobcat
So what if it is a man bashing thread? Some men are lucky to not be physically bashed on a daily basis with the shit they come out with to women. It's utterly deserved.
Can you imagine the uproar if a man said this about something a woman said ! Disgusting !

I am with you @canwetalkaboutcake it is really annoying , I have had men and women say it to me in the past . sometimes when I am just tired so not grinning like a Cheshire cat and other times when something bad happened / I have had bad news .
People should mind their own business

I’ve never had a woman say cheer up or smile

Why are people coming back with anecdotes about women having said similar things ?? In all my 50 years I cannot recall a woman saying anything remotely comparable. I can however remember being asked how much I charged when waiting for a friend outside a pub when I was 17. I can remember numerous “cheer ups/smile” Etc. I can remember being told by my manager to put a dish of food between my legs to warm it up when I was a teenage waitress. All of those were said to me by men. What is it that means people are so keen to chirp up with NAMALT? I know they’re not - waaay too many are though 🤷‍♀️

Or, he thinks that women are there to delight and entertain men and therefore should be smiley and pretty at all times.

Could be either; we don't know. But I'd err toward my version tbh.

wow, 2 WHOLE EXAMPLES.

Whereas I could probably give you 20 examples from the day i had to walk home from the OB/GYN when i was having an MC. So fuck that. It is VASTLY more likely to come from (usually older) men in the direction of (usually younger) women.

And anyone trying to say otherwise is displaying handmaidenly behaviour.

I tell them my grandad died.

He did...about 10 years ago but hopefully makes them think about saying it next time.

I love this -

'A random man has life advice'! 😂

Those saying it's not misogyny are totally kidding themselves.

Always said by a man to a woman.

It's condescending and uncalled for.

Read also "Doesn't hurt to smile, love".

I would never, ever make a comment like this to a man so why the hell do they feel the need to talk to women like that?
Does it make me feel cheery and cared for? No.
Does it make me feel pissed off and belittled? Yes.
Do they care? Of course they fucking don't.

WhateverAgains
I was recently at the airport and a young woman told a man to cheer up and smile and did he not get enough sex this weekend, while he was sat next to his partner. Disgusting.

This never happened.

Ah misogyny at it's finest

Another example of the notion that women must smile at men and look sweet, to make them happy. Hopefully this is dying out.

Assertion of dominence. Otherwise known as territory pissing.

Common garden variety and really fucking tedious.

Completely unacceptable and would piss me off no end too.

Fortunately I haven't experienced it.

I'm not sure I would bite back, but I applaud those that would.

Rude CF.

What utter nonsense.
He was being a prick.

If I'd been OP I'd have responded with "I've just had to agree to turn my [insert relative of choice here]'s life support off."

If you think someone looks sad and in need of help, offer help. Don't tell them to 'cheer up'.

Me neither. Never. And I’ve asked many men, and none that I’ve asked have been told to cheer up by a random woman. We just don’t do it because we don’t feel fucking entitled to foist our unsolicited opinion on strangers. Perhaps we should start.