So upset about dp prospects

[Desperatetime]

I don't know what I wish to achieve by posting here but I need it off my chest.
Dp came from another country several years ago and was granted work permission last year I helped him get work through an agency in a factory setting but it's only minimum wage and he has relatives back in his home country who are always looking towards him for financial help due to extremely low wages there.
Dp attended school in his home country but he left at age 14 to work and help his family who where quite poor.
Dp said there was no such thing as leaving school with grades etc and he was never able to release any potential.
What I've found is that dp is actually very clever and appears to pick things up very quickly and is very capable but we are stuck we can't afford training and he is working full-time so no time and I've helped apply for jobs but we are finding his cv is very tricky as hardly any work history here in the uk and no UK education.
He is never selected on any job application rejection after rejection and he is 46 now.
His current employer is so happy with him thinks he's great etc but it's minimum wage and he can't increase his income or learn new things. Please go easy on me I'm upset about this.

It takes a lot of work to get a new role. I am a very highly qualified financial services professional that works on contract. When I am looking for a new contract I target at least 1 application per day. Some applications can take a long time and I estimate I get any sort of reply at all from 10% of them.
Unfortunately there is no quick fix sometimes you just have to plug away until something clicks.
Work on his qualifications and just keep applying.

Annon1234
Part of the issue is that dp is now 46 and starting out at the level of a school leaver its so late for him now.

It would be worth taking time to think about what his strengths are and what he'd like to do and learn. Then you can both do some research online to find training and courses (free if possible) that could help. If he is interested in the subject, then learning will be easier, even if he is tired after work/ at the weekend.

It would be a huge loss for his talent and intelligence not to be made the most of.

Maybe once you know what he'd like to do and learn about you can ask on here for some advice particular to his area of interest?

That's tough about supporting family back home. Of course he can't just stop. BUT, he can explain that he is studying to improve his earning potential and they'll have to make do with no increases while he is studying. Or you could move house, change your names and never speak to them again? Tempting 😉

Good luck OP.

Picklemeyellow
Yes he isn't afraid of hard work

He needs to keep applying, schools are screaming out for caretakers atm. My husband has about three caretaker vacancies he’s struggling to fill in his schools.

When he first applied to be a caretaker he probably applied to about 5 places before he got an interview. Just because one place doesn’t accept you doesn’t mean another place won’t.

I would speak to your local college about evening courses etc
Does he know what he would like to train as?
Student loans aren’t just a available for uk citizens and there is an upper age limit so he wouldn’t necessarily need to pay the whole lot back. It is quite minimal per month and only over earnings of £25,000.

So I'm guessing...if you say you're still paying for visas, he doesn't have full-time residency yet, which is also the reason he can't get onto free training? When that comes through, everything will change.

Everyone that has to retrain is in the same boat though. People his age made redundant in disappearing professions, mums re-entering the workforce now the DC have flown the nest. He still has over 20yrs to retirement, that is long enough for an entire second career.

He is not. He has work experience which should be on his CV and by his age it shoukd be considerable work experience. That's a bonus compared to school leavers.

Does he get people to help him with his written applications? He needs to each time.

McDonalds is the place for men in his situation. The pace of promotion for older workers who proof themselves is huge & they offer up so much training. My aunt started there 6ish years ago with absolutely no work experience - they agreed to let her take any internal course she wanted and she chose all the legal stuff which then led to a law degree & now she’s got a work placement internally to train up as a solicitor.

I half want to see his CV. I have a feeling it isn’t written the best it could be.
If he’s not getting interviews, then the CV is an issue.

How long has he been in the UK? Does he have a community from his home country locally? Most immigrants (my family included) tend to rely on community to help settle with jobs.

Dp is open to absolutely anything but he has said he wants something where he can learn and progress not just stuck doing the same tedious work day in and day out but apart from that he will do anything to earn money thats necessary for survival.

There may be employment schemes in your area for people who are ‘underemployed’, that is ( in your DP case, people who are in work but want better work. Ask at your local council’ s employment support team if they have anything like this. Some of these schemes are really good and can offer a mentor, paying for training: equipment etc to help people into better paid work. Good luck. ( if there is nothing now, there may be in the future as employment support schemes often work on short term funding.

Ah! Found this. Workshops on how to polish up your CV
https://www.gov.uk/government/news/get-help-to-apply-for-the-job-you-want-and-make-your-job-application-stand-out-from-the-crowd

He can sign up and get advice on his CV.

Expectations of relatives abroad can be hard to manage.

I'm not sure if this is the situation with your partner, but often the extended family will club together money to send one ambitious and skilled family member abroad with the expectation that they will earn well and repay the family's sacrifice through remittances, lifting them to a more secure position and then return a hero.

The reality is that many immigrants end up in immigration camps, working in the grey economy or in min wage work, sometimes in worse situations than they were back home but carrying the baggage of their family's hopes and dreams.

Their family's are heavily emotionally as well as financially invested in their relatives success, because often those who leave dont come back. They either die abroad, or increasingly struggle to send money back. So at an emotional level, the relatives are trying to keep their ties to him while also recouping their investment in case support ceases.

But stories about the riches to be made in Europe/US still drive families to pursue this, because history is written by the winners, and he doesnt want to look like a loser in the eyes of his family.

Its a weird clash of dreams and reality.

The families know that their relative is unlikely to become superrich, but there are advantages to sacrificing them; the immigrant knows that life in the West is not all roses, but needs to keep up the illusion for personal pride.

OP and @IslaWinds even with the workshop/training it helps to get someone else preferably someone who recruits or works in the areas he's interested in, to look over at his CV and applications before he sends them off.

And each time if possible.

You’re right it might not, but not doing anything will 100 percent lead to nothing. If he’s willing to do the work, then doing his English and maths, as it’s free other than exams. and also learning to drive if you can help him, gives him a better chance than doing nothing. There are no guarantees in life. Not one person who undertakes adult education is guaranteed a better job at the end of it, they do it to enable them to have the best chance to progress.

You've posted before

It sounds like your dp has done nothing meaningful to improve the situation.

Being hard working and willing to try means nothing. Your DP is low skilled, has no qualifications. No, his prospects aren't great in this country.

His written English should have been improved way before now.

Is he really the only person who can send money back home? My friend is the youngest DD of 4 DC, father was a Nigerian diplomat. Her two older sisters are married to millionaires (oil) in Lagos, think her brother had issues and lived abroad. Yet she (used to work as a PA, now works for a gov scheme helping unemployed to find work) was always asked to send money home to help family and she had/has London living costs. How can that be fair if the sisters are married to millionaires?

One point for the CV/application forms: make it absolutely clear that he has the legal right to work here.

OP, you have posted about him before.

He was allowed to stay in the UK by the skin of his teeth.

You made much of him being your "carer" and how you couldn't live without him, although apparently from this thread you are a carer yourself.

You've been subsidising him for god knows how long and now you're subsidising him and his family.

You need to open your eyes and stop clinging to the idea of this relationship so desperately. I'm not saying you have to break up, but you need to see this clearly and he needs to step up.

Can he work in another department within his existing organisation? Maybe for half a day a week or something?

If formal training isn’t an option then I would suggest networking (aka making friends in industry). What field does he want to get into? Or what skills can he leverage from the job that he has now? Can he find events that are at the intersection of what he is doing and where he wants to be that is aimed at people at managerial level (the imposter syndrome might kick in but hey, everyone is making it up as they go along).

It might take a while but he just needs to meet a few people, go for coffees and get career advice and maybe those people might have a job opening or know someone that does. It’s a long game but worth it.

I am not sure where you are, I am in London and the job market is tough! I have only got my jobs by sending super targeted emails, connections or headhunted.

Good luck x

I had a Brazilian boyfriend a few years ago who worked in a pub cleaning glasses in London, came here on a tourist visa and was then here illegally. English was quite good spoken unsure otherwise. He had lots of schemes to get rich (promoting footballers) but no firm plans. Previous job was driving long distance lorries in Brazil. I realised our lives were just too different.