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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Natural birth

294 replies

Weirdbigtoe · 02/10/2023 21:47

What is classed as a natural birth-is it vaginal birth with no pain relief at all?
I had a vaginal birth, but requested epidural. My mum to this day still asks why, I can’t remember being massively informed at the time, but just basically not wanting any pain, is this weird? It seems incredulous to my mum. It wouldn’t have affected my Dd would it?
Where I am they don’t have gas & air, the only option was epidural or not, hence why I went for it, if they had gas and air I would have had that

OP posts:
Mummy08m · 02/10/2023 21:49

Not really your mum's business, is it?

I would take an extremely dim view of my mum having an opinion on my birth choices. Luckily, she knows this and wouldn't

gotomomo · 02/10/2023 21:51

I personally think it's without pain relief, I didn't have any for dd2, it was fine. Guess you are in the USA? I was surprised they didn't have gas and air only more intervention based pain relief, I'm guessing the anaesthetist lobby doesn't want to loose business Grin

OhHelloTheres · 02/10/2023 21:52

I don't think of "natural birth" as just meaning without pain relief. There was nothing natural about my episiotomy and forcep delivery, despite me not receiving any pain relief.

Flora56 · 02/10/2023 21:52

I wasn’t aware that natural birth was a medical term. It’s vaginal birth or c section. You had a vaginal birth.

Original poster
Weirdbigtoe · 02/10/2023 21:55

@OhHelloTheres Yes, same here, didn’t get much say in that either

OP posts:
Original poster
Weirdbigtoe · 02/10/2023 21:56

@Flora56 Yes I know, but I’m asking why people say natural birth sometimes and what that means?

OP posts:
IkeandKyle · 02/10/2023 21:56

So called “natural birth” was historically extremely dangerous, leading to high mortality rates for both mums and babies. Natural does not mean safest, or best by any means. Inform yourself and make your own decision for you and your baby - nobody else gets a look in.

Amammai · 02/10/2023 21:57

You had what you needed at the time for your labour and delivery. I agree with the above poster that it has nothing to do with your mum and you have nothing to feel bad about.

Pain is different for everyone and different in every labour. Someone might come a long and say they breathed their baby out no problem without any pain relief…great for them. But not possible or even desirable for everyone.

Epidurals are very safe and effective for mum and baby. As far as I know, that method of pain relief does not have any side effects for the baby at all.

Thatcat · 02/10/2023 21:59

No, I don’t think it would have effected your daughter.

I had a c-section, I didn’t birth my child into the matrix by AI. It wasn’t unnatural for me to get my child into the world in any way I could.

Maybe tell your mum, she doesn’t have to understand. She did her way and you do it your way, and maybe she can mind her own biz.

IkeandKyle · 02/10/2023 22:00

As a PP said, “natural” birth has no definition in medical terms. Normal vaginal delivery (NVD) is probably closest, but there’s been a ridiculous drive in the past decade towards a totally drug-free birth without pain relief. Believe me they don’t give out any medals for this and there’s no evidence it’s better for baby.

WeWereInParis · 02/10/2023 22:00

Weirdbigtoe · 02/10/2023 21:56

@Flora56 Yes I know, but I’m asking why people say natural birth sometimes and what that means?

I think because it's not an actual medical term, it doesn't have one definition. Some people would use it to mean vaginal, some would use it to mean vaginal and without things like forceps, some would use it to mean vaginal and without pain relief, some would use it to mean vaginal and non-induced etc.
It's definitely referring to vaginal birth, but beyond that I think people may use it differently.

eandz13 · 02/10/2023 22:00

'Natural birth', to me, just means vaginally. I'd use the term/s 'non medicated/unassisted' if for whatever reason I was looking for a term that gave context.

Original poster
Weirdbigtoe · 02/10/2023 22:02

Yes I was induced too

OP posts:
AnneWhittle · 02/10/2023 22:03

exactly, it means different things to different people
its not at all wierd to not want to feel pain and I assume both you and your baby are healthy?
Not for your mum to have an opinion at all
If you ever have another baby, you might want to inform yourself a bit more, there are choices you can make...but they are choices for YOU to make!

SouthLondonMum22 · 02/10/2023 22:03

You didn't want to be in pain so accepted something completely safe so you wouldn't be in pain. Not weird at all.

I loved my epidural.

IslaWinds · 02/10/2023 22:04

IkeandKyle · 02/10/2023 21:56

So called “natural birth” was historically extremely dangerous, leading to high mortality rates for both mums and babies. Natural does not mean safest, or best by any means. Inform yourself and make your own decision for you and your baby - nobody else gets a look in.

Speaking of informing yourself, it was the lack of basic hygiene that made childbirth so much more dangerous historically. Such as doctors dissecting cadavers and then delivering babies without even washing their hands. The #1 killer of women in those days was infection commonly called childbed fever.

Also “natural birth” as in without intervention was historically much safer than birth with interventions even with the hygiene issues. Forceps- dirty and disgusting often killed the baby and mother. C-section- good luck surviving that in the 1700s!

happsy · 02/10/2023 22:04

I think your mum sounds so pathetic questioning you this way. Where does she display her medal for having no pain relief? Oh right she didn't get one. Why do some women think they are better if they had a vaginal, no pain relief birth?? It matters to nobody.

RoomOfRequirement · 02/10/2023 22:04

Natural birth isn't a thing. Because a C-section is not an unnatural delivery. As long as you and your baby are safe and healthy, it doesn't matter if it was vaginal or epidural or vacuum or literally anything else. Natural birth is just ANOTHER thing society holds over women's heads to make them feel bad if they didn't give birth alone in a field with nature.

CattingAbout · 02/10/2023 22:06

I think some peope just say 'natural birth' because they don't want to say the word 'vaginal' tbh.

Flora56 · 02/10/2023 22:06

IslaWinds · 02/10/2023 22:04

Speaking of informing yourself, it was the lack of basic hygiene that made childbirth so much more dangerous historically. Such as doctors dissecting cadavers and then delivering babies without even washing their hands. The #1 killer of women in those days was infection commonly called childbed fever.

Also “natural birth” as in without intervention was historically much safer than birth with interventions even with the hygiene issues. Forceps- dirty and disgusting often killed the baby and mother. C-section- good luck surviving that in the 1700s!

Show quote history

Yes, I and my baby would have been dead back in the day. Sadly you can’t breathe your way out of life threatening pre eclampsia. Thank goodness for modern medicine.

PPPPPPPOTTER · 02/10/2023 22:07

Natural birth really is what would happen if you had your baby at home. Go into labour, give birth without intervention, un medicated. Works for lots of people. Harder to achieve in a hospital setting. Unsafe for a small number of people. There's no judgement in it. But lots of people have a lot of trauma and even mentioning the words natural birth will make some people go nuts.

IslaWinds · 02/10/2023 22:13

Flora56 · 02/10/2023 22:06

Yes, I and my baby would have been dead back in the day. Sadly you can’t breathe your way out of life threatening pre eclampsia. Thank goodness for modern medicine.

Show quote history

Yes modern medicine has saved lives, but the poster claiming that “natural birth” was historically extremely dangerous leading to high mortality rates was glossing over the real reasons behind the high mortality rates. It wasn’t not having pain relief or being at home.

IslaWinds · 02/10/2023 22:15

PPPPPPPOTTER · 02/10/2023 22:07

Natural birth really is what would happen if you had your baby at home. Go into labour, give birth without intervention, un medicated. Works for lots of people. Harder to achieve in a hospital setting. Unsafe for a small number of people. There's no judgement in it. But lots of people have a lot of trauma and even mentioning the words natural birth will make some people go nuts.

Yes. That is generally how it is defined. Vaginal birth with no drugs or intervention after spontaneous labour. Can be at home or in a hospital- although 99% of hospitals can’t not intervene in some way so very rare.

It’s not a better way to birth but it is a way to birth that is as real as a c-section is a way to birth.

happsy · 02/10/2023 22:16

Natural birth is just ANOTHER thing society holds over women's heads to make them feel bad if they didn't give birth alone in a field with nature.

Not society, women. It's always women who are the ones judging. Always.

IslaWinds · 02/10/2023 22:18

happsy · 02/10/2023 22:16

Natural birth is just ANOTHER thing society holds over women's heads to make them feel bad if they didn't give birth alone in a field with nature.

Not society, women. It's always women who are the ones judging. Always.

100%. It is women doing the judging of each other and of all birth choices. I don’t know what it is but some women think anyone making a different choice is personally attacking their choice. We should live and let live.